How To Get An Emotionally Unavailable Man To Commit

by Black Love And Marriage.com on February 21, 2012

in Singles & Dating

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By Chris J Roberts

There are men who simply enjoy the art of dating. Their lives are full and they only want to have fun in the dating circle. What if you were the woman he constantly turned to for fun? Do you think he would reconsider to make a commitment? Possibly; but keep in mind that the road to commitment with an emotionally unavailable man is long and hard.

If you are willing to put in the time and effort to get a commitment, you could be the woman that makes him see relationships in a different light. Keep in mind that you need to show him. Nothing you say will convince him. It must be something he sees with his eyes and feels in his heart.

Men commit when they feel the woman in their life enhances their life without demands and complications. No amount of time or conversation will change a man’s mind about being in a relationship. Your job is to let him see that you are the woman that makes his life fun, exciting and stimulating.

A non-committal man will avoid a nagger like the plague. If you constantly remind him you are the best thing that has ever happened to him, he will cease to hear your words. He doesn’t want to be convinced that you are the woman for him; he needs to feel it. Nagging him will most certainly cause distance between the both of you and eventually he will avoid you and your frustrating conversations.

You will have to change your thought process to be with a non-committal man. You need to let him have his space and not question him about it. You will have to become understanding of his need to have his friends and toys. When he decides to spend his time with you, make the best of it. Don’t remind him of how long it’s been since you’ve seen him or heard from him. Simply enjoy the time he has made for you.

Use your time together to establish a relationship that gives him something no one else gives him. Allow him opportunities to talk to you with a level of comfort he doesn’t experience with anyone else. Encourage his thoughts and opinions with criticism or judgment. Allow him to relate to you on a level above and beyond physical attraction.

If he knows that he will have fun, exciting and intellectual experiences when he is with you, he will seek out your time for those experiences. Patience is the key with Mr. Emotionally Unavailable Men. Be patient, understanding and unpredictable. Keep him guessing what’s next with you and give him a new experience every time he’s with you. Mr. Unavailable Men is looking for new ways to have fun. Give him what he’s looking for and he won’t look any further.

 

{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

1 life's_a_female_dog June 5, 2013 at 9:07 pm

I have to agree that staying with a man like this is a piece of work. Do I think men like this can eventually commit to a woman? Yes, of course. But it won’t be because of her loving care that made him change. It will be something of a greater power like a serious life experience that motivates him to change. And if she has a eye opener about herself as well, they may can work out. But this situation is probably rare. I also do agree that women who stay with men like this have issues that they need to address in their own lives. I don’t believe that every woman who stays with a man like this stays because she has no self worth though. Sometimes she is on the fence in the relationship always challenging him because she does know her self worth but is inexperienced and was taught through familial experiences that this is how relationships work. And until someone helps her to see that this isn’t all there is, she will stay with him. But when she finally does see, if she still stays, then she probably doesn’t have self worth or just doesn’t care at all.

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2 Jane May 23, 2013 at 3:38 pm

So what if you are that girl and your EUM proposes to you and then cheats on you? Is he distancing out of fear or does EUM equal player?

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3 CRT January 22, 2013 at 2:04 pm

For this to work- patience is the key. Enjoy the time together and keep yourself busy with your life until your next date. :)

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4 MariJ September 24, 2012 at 7:28 pm

So you're basically saying to be available to him whenever he wants and to excuse his unavailibility and settle for what he gives you? HELL NO. I'm sorry, but a woman who does this has low-self worth and doesn't value her time enought to realize he doesn't see you as valuable either. Usually women who stick with men who are emotionally unavailable are emotionally unavailable themselves. Move on and find someone who is open and healthy.

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5 @msprissy209 February 22, 2012 at 9:27 am

I am on the fence with this article…I see both points those that say its too much work and the authors point….I would have to seriously think about this…often time I don't think these type of men should even date…..they will always find drama being emotionally unavailable__

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6 Jules February 22, 2012 at 2:56 am

What a piece of work, sounds like another full time job, only with this one there is no surety you will get paid..lol. Whoever wrote this, just wow..roflmbao.

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7 azaleeeshe February 22, 2012 at 12:35 am

Ummm Next…to bend to someone's needs like this who HASN'T proven he is worthy of you is a NO F'ing No! #FAIL

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8 Jamila February 22, 2012 at 12:19 am

I needed that! thank you.

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9 Mrs_Sthomas February 21, 2012 at 10:52 pm

I agree with u, notanoption. To All Women, say “next” because there are million men out here who are ready to commit. This article was a bunch of B.S. if I wasted my time on a man who was not ready to be in a relationship, I would be unmarried and single. I’m now happily married.

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10 notanoption February 21, 2012 at 10:05 pm

Find a man that wants a relationship instead. Don't waste time on unavailable people period.

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11 jackieholness February 21, 2012 at 9:49 pm

No patience for that…what.so.ever…
My recent post After the Altar Call Release Party Pics!!!

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12 Tia February 21, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Great read! As I read this article I laugh to myself….because I am that woman who has tried to convince a non commital dude why he should be in a relationship with a wonderful woman like myself:) My, my, my if I would have read this article just 4 months earlier it would have set me free ! Nevertheless, lesson learned and I’m moving forward. Thanks Mr. Robert

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