I Don’t Condemn Anyone For Choosing To Divorce & I Believe No One Should Condemn Me For Making My Marriage Work
By Neysa Ellery Taylor
For the past 72 hours, I’ve been taking body shots. No, not the type of body shot that involves drinking liquor off some strangers belly. I am talking about the world of boxing and the body shots that come from having hard blows hitting you in the stomach. That is the body shot that I am referencing. Why? Because I decided to share my testimony with a nationwide audience. That’s why.
I’m not going to go into a back story here, you can google my name if you want the details or just search my name on the blog. It’s all there for you to read. And actually that is how the problem arose. I decided to share my test and resulting testimony with a large audience. And that made some people very angry and very opinionated.
But opinions are like assholes – everyone has one, right? So it’s fine. Disagree with me. I don’t mind that. As a journalist (that is my full time gig) people disagree with me all the time. I am used to that. But I must say I wasn’t prepared for the onslaught of negative energy that came from my latest autobiographical post on blackloveandmarriage.com. The most negative remarks even went as far as to call me a bad mother. That remark had me ready to “vaseline up” but instead I took a break. But now I am back and ready to address it.
Here’s the deal: As I said before I’m not the poster child for marriage or infidelity. I in no way condemn anyone for choosing to divorce just like I believe no one should condemn me for making my marriage work. I don’t know what God told you to do, just like you don’t know how He spoke to me. You can choose to discredit my encounter with God if you’d like. I don’t have to convince you of anything. You know why? He wasn’t talking to you! He was talking to me. And I listened and stepped out on faith.
I share my story not for elevation or to be put on a pedestal. I share my story because:
1. It helps me heal. Writing helps me process and move forward. Publishing means you get to come along for the ride.
2. To show that God is able to repair a marriage. Even a jacked up looks like it’s over marriage.
3. To illustrate that in the midst of trials, you can grow and change for the better. (Damascus anyone?)
4. To show that forgiveness is real. God forgives me daily (actually much more often then that – I’m kinda a hot mess) and I am trying to learn to share that forgiveness with others.
5. To give hope to others. If there is another person out there going through a trying situation and hearing the voice of God in the midst of it, I want to let them know that it’s ok to trust that voice REGARDLESS of what everyone says.
That’s it. That’s why I write and publish. Am I looking for praise? Nope. But I will gladly accept prayer.
So for all the people that disagreed (hated on) my post, sorry that I riled you up. But I am just getting started. Your angst does not change my purpose or my pen. I am trying to live my life His way. All I’m trying to hear Him say at the end of my days is “Well Done.”
Neysa Ellery Taylor lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her husband, Chris, and their 4 children – Asyen, Maya, Preston, and Patrick. An Emmy-Award winning journalist, she hopes to share her passion for marriage and God through her writing. You can read more of her work at www.myriadthatisme.blogspot.com