Are You Willing To Go The Extra Mile For Your Partner Sexually?
by Kristen Mark
The statistic that CNN reported indicating over 40 million Americans were stuck in a sex rut and more than half of Americans were dissatisfied with their sex lives would leave one to believe that maintaining a good sex life isn’t that important to the majority. I recently analyzed some data that made me think the opposite – maintaining a good sex life is very important to the majority.
I collaborated with colleagues from Good in Bed in partnership with Pure Romance, Men’s Health, and Women’s Health to conduct a survey and collect data from over 4,800 men and women on a variety of “what if’s” regarding sex and relationships. When I was analyzing this data, I quickly began to notice a theme in the results; both men and women were really willing to go the extra mile for their sex lives to flourish.
Here are just a few examples demonstrating this trend I observed in response to the survey (note: participants could choose more than one response option, so not all numbers will add up to 100%):
What Would You Do If…
- Your partner wants you to try something that makes you feel sort of embarrassed in bed: More men (53.2%) than women (39.8%) would indulge their partner, and both women and men would give it a try (66.1% of men and 77.0% of women).
- You find out your partner watches porn regularly: 63.9% of men and 46.8% of women would ask to watch it with them.
- Your partner wants to watch porn with you: 75.5% of men and 69.1% of women would say go for it – that porn spices up a relationship, and 35.8% of men and 31.8% of women would want to look online for porn together.
- Your partner wants to engage in BDSM behavior: 24.2% would think about it and 54.9% would have a discussion with their partner about it.
- Your partner wants to have a threesome: Although more women (37.3%) than men (15.1%) would say “absolutely not”, the most common response from both men and women was to talk through it (41.7% of women and 48.2% of men), with thinking about it indicated by 28.0% of women and 35.8% of men.
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Interesting study, I think. I would imagine that many new & old relationships fizzle out because 1 partner has become less interested in sex with the other partner (for whatever reason). Sex is an important aspect of intimacy within most relationships among people who are able to have sex. When the physical connection that sex promotes – is removed from an active relationship – a couple/partners either develop other ways to counteract that missing component or endure through the lose in some other way (most times negatively).
The key thing I did notice is that most people were willing to either "try" or at least have a discussion. It's totally off-putting when you're excited, but your partner isn't in the mood & doesn't want to try at all to please you. There's only so much of that type of rejection a normal, sexually intimate person can take.
OOOOOooooo Lord! This article is way to spicy for me but it is a lot to think about. These are real issues that relationships face. Mine is no different. I would consider some things on the list but participating in BDSM Behavior or having a threesome is OUT the question. Although I love my spouse with my whole heart, I have to be true to myself. I don't get down like that. I feel like participating in activities such as this is very harmful to a marriage. Plus in my opinion is just plain ole filthy.