Common Says Erykah Badu Was His First Love And His First Heartbreak

By Danielle Canada

From Hip Hop Wired

Rapper Common is dishing on personal parts of his life including details of his two year relationship with Erykah Badu.

The Chi-town emcee recently taped an episode of The Wendy Williams show where he revealed that the seductive songstress broke his heart when she ended their relationship.  Common says,

“She handed it to me. I was in my hotel room on tour and …she called me and was like, ‘Hey, I don’t wanna be in this relationship no more. I’m liking somebody else. That was my first love and my first heartbreak.”

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These Are My Black Marriage Role Models

By Briana Myricks

My marriage means so much to me. It’s a union between myself and my best friend. Going into the marriage, we didn’t have the best role models within our immediate family. Don’t get me wrong; we have a few. There’s my uncle and aunt, who have a great marriage and did it the right way (marriage, house, then a child). There’s his sister and his brother-in-law, who both were in the military and live a great life that my husband and I both would love. I would include his parents and my grandparents based on their marriages now but both of those were rocky in the beginning years. My parents, who married my stepparents when I was young, both have experienced divorce.

This was a huge concern for me once we got engaged. With the scary statistics of divorce, I felt anxious about finding marriage role models. Who would we look up to? Who would we model our relationship after? How would we go from being married at 20 to still being married 50 years later? While none of these examples have hit the 50 year mark yet, these celebrity spouses have become my black marriage role models:

Barack and Michelle Obama: How refreshing to have a black president and a black first lady. Their love just warms         my heart. They are truly each other’s backbone, and it shows. They’ve been together since college, and you can just tell they have a bond like no other. To have that type of marriage in the forefront, not just for me, but for all of America to see, is just a blessing. They complement each other so well, and I can just feel the love they have for each other. I want to have that effect on people. I want them to know when they see my husband and I that we truly love each other.

Beyonce (Knowles) and Sean (Jay-Z) Carter: They may not have been listed first, but this is my all time favorite couple. I’m a Jay-Z fanatic. Not a groupie; I really enjoy his music, so much so that it inspired a tattoo of mine. Their relationship makes me grin from ear to ear. They’re very private and secretive, even going as far as getting married on the low. I love watching interviews to see if one is going to mention the other. They giggle when the other is mentioned. They can work together and support each other without everyone being in their business. You can imagine how absolutely excited I was to find out they were expecting. I want to keep my marriage between my husband and I.

Will and Jada (Pinkett) Smith: The entire Internet universe went crazy when rumors were spreading that this couple was heading for splitsville. I feel like I was the only person in my network who just knew it wasn’t true. Now I don’t know Will and Jada like that, but I can just feel the energy their relationship has. They are each other’s cheerleaders and campaign managers. They can joke, they show public displays of affection, and they’re awesome parents too. I want my marriage to be as fun as theirs.

Mariah (Carey) and Nick Cannon: Surprised to see this couple on the list? You shouldn’t be. They’re defying all the odds. I’ll admit, I thought it was an odd pair, but hey, their relationship is their business. Now new parents, Mariah and Nick don’t care what anyone says about their marriage. They are focused on loving each other. And Nick just loves his wife to pieces! I don’t want to let what anyone says affect my marriage, just like them.

Kimora (Lee Simmons) and Djimon Hounsou: Besides being an absolutely stunning couple, I love how they make the blended family work. Djimon accepts Kimora’s daughters, Aioki and Ming, while also loving their son Kenzo. The fact that they have a relationship with Kimora’s ex Russell is just worth applause to me. I come from a blended family, and I have to say, I would’ve loved if my parents could’ve been like this. I admire how comfortable they are with each other’s careers.

Oprah Winfrey & Steadman Graham: Okay, so not a traditional “marriage” but a romantic partnership nonetheless. I’m a powerful, headstrong woman myself, and I’ve been focused on taking over the world since I was 5. My husband doesn’t feel threatened by that at all. He just supports me. Steadman isn’t in the way or intimidated by Oprah’s success. He lets her be herself, and I admire that so much.

Our families may not have provided us with a lot of good examples of marriage, but as long as these couples are in the media giving positive vibes about it, I can really believe in happily ever after.

Briana Myricks became a freelance writer and blogger after being laid off unexpectedly. She blogs about life as a young newlywed at 20 and Engaged.

Steve Harvey’s Wife Helps Teens Steer Clear Of Pregnancy And Prostitution

By Team Blam

We’d like to give a special shout out to Marjorie Harvey who on October 28th – 30th in Atlanta, Ga., will be conducting her second annual Girls Who Rule The World Mentoring Weekend.  The Harvey Foundation will host 100 “diverse” teenage girls from the Atlanta Metro Area and help them navigate the pressures of teen issues such as pregnancy and prostitution.  You’re probably thinking as we were…”What..teen prostitution?”  According to some statistics Georgia ranks third in the nation for teenage prostitution.  Wow!!!

In consideration of the grim statistics Marjorie spoke on the importance of getting involved.  She said, “To me it’s just a moral responsibility that we have, we’ve got to start doing something, each and every person that can,” she added. “I’m doing what I can, but that means you and any and everybody else that will get involved, we’ve got to get involved in these girls lives to get them to understand regardless of what mistakes that you’ve made, we’re here and we can move forward and turn things around.”

Yall know that we here at BLAM are all about turning things around for our relationships, families, and community.  We are proud of the young women who have shown the courage to take this positive step toward their growth and development.  And guess what…if you know of anyone that may be interested in being one of the 100 teenage girls that participate in this program IT IS NOT TOO LATE TO APPLY.  THE APPLICATION DEADLINE HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO SEPTEMBER 12, 2011.

Application Requirements

  • Eligible participants must be girls 13-18 years old
  • Currently enrolled in an accredited school at time of submission
  • Live in metro Atlanta, GA and/or surrounding areas
  • Complete application & Submit 300 word essay
  • Commit to minimal two year mentoring program
  • Commit to attending full mentoring weekend
  • Attend mid-year retreat & commit to mentoring process

Once again…kudos to Marjorie Harvey to investing time and energy toward the development of teenage girls.  If you or someone you know may be interested in applying for the Girls Who Rule The World Mentoring Weekend CLICK HERE for more details.

So Official! Beyonce And Jay Z Announce Baby On Board

Last night at the VMA’s Beyonce in stunning fashion “freed” herself by exposing the secret she’s been hiding from the public for some time…..she’s pregnant.  After performing “Love On Top” she dropped the mic, unbuttoned her jacket, and began rubbing her belly….instant classic.  Jay Z was grinning from ear to ear as the audience clapped and cheered.  This moment…their moment was definitely memorable.  Congratulations Jay Z and Beyonce on your pregnancy.  We at BLAM wish you health and happiness as you continue to build your family.  To check out their announcement….see the video below.

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, Beyoncé

Black Love Real Love: Nick Ashford And Valerie Simpson

In memory of Nick, who passed away August 23rd 2011 at age 70, we’re paying tribute to the love between Ashford and Simpson by displaying some of their pics and tunes.  The two met at a Harlem church in 1963 and immediately felt a connection with each other.  As there love blossomed so did there desire for music.  The pair formed a group and began and began pursuing their musical dreams together.  Question….Is your love  “Solid As A Rock”? or Is your spouse “All You Need To Get By”?

Boris Kodjoe Tweets Advice On How To Be A Man And How To Love A Woman

By Team BLAM

Happily married actor, Boris Kodjoe in response to a friends tweets about what to look for in a man, chimed in with a list of his own on how to be a man and how to love a woman.  We give major props to Boris because he unashamedly represents marriage in a positive way and has no problem affirming his wife Nicole Arie Parker.

“- Embrace your imperfections

– Laugh at yourself. A woman likes a man who doesn’t take himself too serious.

– Fix or build something with your hands. It’ll show her that you are capable of taking care of a home.

– Know how to cook and clean. It’ll show her that you don’t need her but that you WANT her.

– Get your passport and travel. A man needs to see the world.

– Communicate without cursing. You don’t need to curse to make a point. Cursing shows lack of substance.

– In bed, take care of your woman first. When she’s satisfied you are DA MAN!!!

– Stay in shape. It’ll show her that you care about yourself and therefore are able to care about her.

– Take care of your responsibilities. Anything less is unacceptable. A boy is irresponsible, not a man.

– Open her her door and pull out her chair. It shows her that you honor traditional values. Trust me, she will do the same.

– Be present! Take her in with your eyes and ears. Your attention will make her feel loved and she won’t ever nag you.

– Read a f—ing book! (Sorry, violation of ‘no cursing’ rule) But seriously, ignorance is a major turn-off. Book on tape will do.

– Have an ambition. You don’t need to be rich but you need to show direction and motivation. Keep a job!

– Last one for today: Treat a woman the way you would want your daughter to be treated. Anything less is unacceptable.”

Ladies you may want to show this list to your man! Fellas if you’re reading this, take note.

VIDEO: Jada Pinkett Smith Talks About Her Successful Marriage And The One Secret That’s Kept It That Way

By Team BLAM

VIDEO: Recently, Jada Pinkett Smith sat down with CNN’s Piers Morgan and dished about her hubby and some of the keys to a successful marriage. Living very public lives in the limelight of Hollywood Will & Jada have been married for 14 blissful years and truly give marriage a good reputation. Listen in as Jada gives some much needed marital advice.