Many people are kinky and some are more kinky than others.  When you’re married should there be limits to how kinky you get and how kinky you expect your spouse to get?  Do boundaries still exist?  Is it o.k to say no to your husband or wife if they want to engage in a sexual act that is unsettling/uncomfortable to you.  Should you be sensitive to your spouse’s limitations and accept them for who they are and where they are in there sexual development?  Check out this video where we help this lady out who’s wondering if she should give in to her man’s desire to go from fingers to fisting.

 

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There is no worse let down for a man than to be in an amazing sexual experience only to be turned off by something that his partner knowingly or unknowingly does to send his arousal from seven to zero. Through a poll of about 100 men, I have compiled a list of the top five things women can do to turn men off during sex, and all of these things can be avoided with proper preparation. Take a look at what men are saying will send their libido south during sex.

1. Bad Hygiene
Bad breath, poorly cleaned genitals and bad bodily odor were at the top of the list for things that can turn a man off during sex. To avoid sending your partner running for the hills, make sure to brush your teeth thoroughly before sex as well as shower. If you believe your vagina is harboring a smell that is unnatural to your natural scent, consult your doctor to ensure you do not have a pH imbalance caused from a buildup of bacteria or from an infection.

2. Lack of Confidence
Complaints about feeling or looking fat, being unsure of sexual skills and complaining about it and being afraid to be seen naked in the light are all confidence issues that men wish would be left outside of the bedroom. Having confidence in yourself while in the nude and during sexual performance helps your partner to enjoy your company as much as he would want to with no limits. If you are insecure about your weight, adopt a cleaner diet consisting of green veggies, lean protein and low carb and low sugar intake. If you are unsure of your sexual skills, take a few sexual technique classes or read up on new techniques to spice up your skills. Watch adult performers use tricks that you may be able to use in your own personal life, and above all, ask your partner for guidance and help in aiding in the enhancement of your sexual skills.

3. Too Much Talking
Communication during sex is vital to know what does and doesn’t work for your partner, but when the talking goes outside of the sexual moment into other topics or when the talking becomes a list of demands, a man can only stand it for so long. If you would like to vent about your day or talk about who will be rearranging the furniture, leave that conversation for before getting into a sexual situation or afterwards. If you would like to tell your partner how you want to be pleasured, use wording that is less demanding and give suggestions (e.g., can we switch to this position? This feels much better than that. I love it when you do this that way, etc.)

CLICK HERE to read more.

By Tyomi Morgan

It is of no surprise to me that the average couple only spends one to four minutes on foreplay before jumping right into the penetration portion of intercourse, considering we live in a day and age where everything is quick, on the go and instant. Somewhere through the decades, we have lost sight of what foreplay is really for. We’ve substituted it with quick, lackluster oral stimulation and saliva to lubricate, but did you know that foreplay is what turns women on and ensures a lasting sexual experience? Let me explain…

Men are easily aroused by sight and sound and can become erect and ready to enter within three minutes. However, it takes women a bit longer to become stimulated and ready to be penetrated (anywhere from 10-15 minutes). Foreplay is a set of physical and mental acts that help ignite the desire for sex, as well as help lower inhibitions in your partner to help you gain his/her trust. When a woman is stimulated before actually being penetrated, her vagina will produce secretions that will help lubricate the area to reduce friction during movement, and her cervix will widen and recede further back toward the uterus to allow a better fit for the penis (the vagina at a resting state before arousal is only about 2.75 inches deep).

If a woman experiences dryness or pain during sex, more than likely her partner hasn’t warmed her up before trying to start the race.  It’s just like jumping into a car in the middle of winter and driving it without letting it warm. Chances are your car will run slow for a few minutes and you may be causing damage to your car in the long run.  When you skip foreplay, you put your partner at risk for tearing, bleeding, pain and a rough experience. More foreplay equals a wider cervix and more lubrication, which encourages better and longer sex.

So, if you are looking for a few quick tips on how to incorporate more foreplay into your sexual experiences, look no more!  CLICK HERE to get your quick tips.

By Kristen Droesch

It’s an old joke that you should always stretch before sex, but nothing could be closer to the truth. Stretching and exercising will go a long way to improving your sex life. And what better way to combine the two than with yoga? Here we have five yoga moves to stretch you out, strengthen your body and get you ready for the big moment.

Move 1: Sat Kriya Meditation
Position yourself with your heels beneath your buttocks. Raise your arms over your head, interlocking your hands with your index fingers pointing to the ceiling. Use the chant “Sat Nam.” On “Sat” pull in your bellybutton, and release on “Nam”. You should focus on pulling energy into your body and releasing it peacefully, as well as lifting and lowering your pelvic floor.

Why you should try it: A form of meditation, this move strengthens core muscles as well as the perineum.

Move 2: Child’s Pose
Again, begin with your heels beneath your buttocks. Your big toes should be touching, and your knees set as wide as your hips. Exhale as you lower your torso to your thighs, and move your arms either straight out of front of you (palms down) or aligned along your bent legs (palms up). Lengthen your spine from your tailbone to your neck and relax into the pose. You can hold this position for anywhere from 30 seconds to several minutes.

Why you should try it: This simple but effective position relaxes you and allows you to center yourself, making for a much more enjoyable time together. Remember, the mind is the sexiest organ!

Move 3: Downward Facing Dog
Begin on your hands and knees. Lift your hips, slowly straightening your arms and legs. You should end in an inverted V position, with your heels touching the floor (but only if you can. If you feel resistance, stay on the balls of your feet). Keep your hands flat on the floor, shoulder-width apart and hold the pose for several breaths.

Why you should try it: This pose hits several important pre-coital points. It will relax the body, stretch the back and pelvis, and just generally boost your confidence (who wouldn’t feel confident in such a powerful pose)?

CLICK HERE to read more.

By Amy Jo Goddard

Given the latest attacks on women’s sexual and reproductive rights and the responses of many critical thinking lawmakers about men’s sexual rights, I thought it was high time I posted the actual Declaration of Sexual Rights.

I’ve often heard people’s surprise at the idea of having sexual rights. I hope you’ll give some thought to the eleven rights that my colleagues at the World Association for Sexology drafted back in 1999 in order to bring into the light how important it is that we address sexuality as a fundamental part of who we are and of our total freedom, equality and certainly, our pursuit of happiness.

DECLARATION OF SEXUAL RIGHTS   Adopted by the World Association for Sexology, Hong Kong, 1999.   Sexuality is an integral part of the personality of every human being. Its full development depends upon the satisfaction of basic human needs such as the desire for contact, intimacy, emotional expression, pleasure, tenderness and love.   Sexuality is constructed through the interaction between the individual and social structures. Full development of sexuality is essential for individual, interpersonal, and societal well being.   Sexual rights are universal human rights based on the inherent freedom, dignity, and equality of all human beings. Since health is a fundamental human right, so must sexual health be a basic human right.   In order to assure that human beings and societies develop healthy sexuality, the following sexual rights must be recognized, promoted, respected, and defended by all societies through all means. Sexual health is the result of an environment that recognizes, respects and exercises these sexual rights.

1. The right to sexual freedom. Sexual freedom encompasses the possibility for individuals to express their full sexual potential. However, this excludes all forms of sexual coercion, exploitation and abuse at any time and situations in life.

2. The right to sexual autonomy, sexual integrity, and safety of the sexual body. This right involves the ability to make autonomous decisions about one’s sexual life within a context of one’s own personal and social ethics. It also encompasses control and enjoyment of our own bodies free from torture, mutilation and violence of any sort.

3. The right to sexual privacy. This involves the right for individual decisions and behaviors about intimacy as long as they do not intrude on the sexual rights of others.

4. The right to sexual equity. This refers to freedom from all forms of discrimination regardless of sex, gender, sexual orientation, age, race, social class, religion, or physical and emotional disability.

5. The right to sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure, including autoeroticism, is a source of physical, psychological, intellectual and spiritual well being.

6. The right to emotional sexual expression. Sexual expression is more than erotic pleasure or sexual acts. Individuals have a right to express their sexuality through communication, touch, emotional expression and love.

7. The right to sexually associate freely. This means the possibility to marry or not, to divorce, and to establish other types of responsible sexual associations.

8. The right to make free and responsible reproductive choices. This encompasses the right to decide whether or not to have children, the number and spacing of children, and the right to full access to the means of fertility regulation.

9. The right to sexual information based upon scientific inquiry. This right implies that sexual information should be generated through the process of unencumbered and yet scientifically ethical inquiry, and disseminated in appropriate ways at all societal levels.

10. The right to comprehensive sexuality education. This is a lifelong process from birth throughout the life cycle and should involve all social institutions.

11. The right to sexual health care. Sexual health care should be available for prevention and treatment of all sexual concerns, problems and disorders.   Sexual Rights are Fundamental and Universal Human Rights

Most of these rights are either currently being violated systemically in the U.S. or proposed amendments and bills will be in violation of them, should they pass.

In case you missed it, Oklahoma State Senator Johnson proposed the “spilled semen amendment” to the Oklahoma state personhood bill, which grants rights to an embryo. In an interview she said that, “Anytime a man spills semen anywhere than in a woman’s vagina he would be deemed as violating this proposal.” Check out the full interview on NPR where lawmakers debate our sexual and reproductive rights.   This is a serious slippery slope. Pay attention!