The Very Awkward First Kiss

By Miss B. Haved

First dates are a mess — a big, huge, filthy, uncomfortable mess. Just give me a set of stirrups, a small, cold room and a hospital gown and I’d feel more at ease.

At some point during a date, you look at the other person and think one of two things — “Is he going to try to kiss me after this date?” or “Please don’t try to kiss me after this date.”

 A diagram of the first kiss

It’s really kind of silly when you think about it. You meet someone for the first time, they buy you dinner and a couple of drinks and you end your time together with one of the most intimate things two people can do together? You don’t lock lips with your dentist after you see him for the first time. You don’t swap spit with your boss at the end of the day (most people don’t, anyway). Why is it somewhat implied that you’ll kiss someone you’ve only known for a few hours just because you spent a couple of hours together?

To kiss or not to kiss: What’s more awkward?

Those of you who saw Enough Said starring the late James Gandolfini and Julia Louis-Dreyfus likely remember that excruciating moment at the end of the date when Gandolfini leans in for the kiss goodnight and Louis-Dreyfus pulls back and says that’s she’s not sure yet. Brutal. Just brutal. This scenario proves that not kissing can be just as awkward as kissing someone you barely know.

To kiss or not to kiss can drive a gal to distraction. I’ve been in both situations, but I must admit my dating experiences seem to end up in the “How am I going to get out of the kiss goodbye” category.

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