We Live. We Love. We Grow: How To Mend Fences After A Big Falling Out

By Lana Moline

One of the things that I haven’t quite figured out totally is how to mend fences after a big falling out.  For me, I seem to still feel the impact of the hurt and bruises that came as a result.  Now I’m not talking about acquaintances with whom I’ve had words because those I can navigate through.  I’m talking about best friends who betray, family who turn their backs or loved ones who are just plain wrong for what they did.

I’ve asked myself whether or not it’s a forgiveness thing because long after I’ve forgiven them, both the hurt and hesitation to trust again still lingers.  I suppose that part is human but what I think happens is that I mourn what our relationship used to be before things changed.  I’m not naive to think that everyone will always remain in my corner but I thought that certain titles had value and being forced to remove someone from a position where they have been for a very long time is a bummer.

Here’s what I wonder: What do you do when the people you love and who loves you hurts you?  How do you handle it when it’s someone who will continue to be in your life, someone who isn’t expendable?  I know I’m not the only one who’s experienced this and who misses easier times and all the wonderful memories.  As an eternal optimist, I still reach to see the good in everyone.  I figure every action is justified even though I may not agree.  Whatever the reason, in the end I wish them well and heed the advice of my theme song that I sing almost daily Earth, Wind and Fire’s “Be Ever Wonderful.”  C’mon, sing it with me

gonna find a few always walk with you

many people claim, don’t always view the same

as you live today, what I wanna say

is be ever wonderful in your own sweet way.”

Listening to these lyrics again tonight rekindled the fact that often times good is returned to us in different packages from the ones that were sent out.  Our goal must be that we preserve our desire to continue to walk in peace and bless others along the way.  We live.  We love.  We grow.

Lana Moline is a freelance writer and poet who lives in Ft. Worth with her three kids and husband Emile. Married 11 years, both media professionals have vowed to maintain integrity in all aspects of print and broadcast journalism.Visit her at www.lanamolinespeaks.wordpress.com

1 reply
  1. Emile
    Emile says:

    To live, love, and grow despite the hurt, disappointment, and challenges
    that impact our lives. Now that my friend is faith and determination.
    To forge ahead in peace and blessings to all when the signs say to give up hope.
    Thanks for the beautiful words and continue sharing your gift of writing with the world.
    I Love You!!

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