What My Little Eyes Saw (Part 1)
By Farraday Miller
Telling you this story is like taking a shower and washing my hair. I want to erase all the toxins, the dirt, the oils, the sweat and all impurities that have taken up residence in my temple. The secrets that I carry with me are not my own. But ones I’ve had to keep because they were imposed by the choices of others. It would be years before I realized that everything I grew up in was a lie and everything that I was taught was rooted in wrong. I was forced to see people who I once held in high regard differently because their sins were surfacing and shattering my innocent thoughts of childhood purity. I was arrested by the image in the mirror and was ashamed at what I saw. There were too many partners to count and when I came to realize exactly what the word adultery meant, it was too late. I, just like both my parents before me, had already jumped into the lake of temptation and replaced all the right that we had been taught with our selfish need to satisfy our forbidden desire. It would be years before I recognized that what my little eyes saw caused me to be broken and led me to an unimaginable place of despair.
It truly takes a lot of courage to admit the hurtful truth about the wrong that has been done to another good person. But the admission is a really good start to steering your life back into one where you recognize where real love is & where your honest love should be given.
When we discover that life wasn't as it seemed, it's earth-shattering. But to know that someone feels you are worthy of such deep love & respect shows you that it's OK to give it whole-heartedly in return.
Yep, many of us learned about infidelity while we were still "knee high". We can't be delivered from these generational curses, until we begin to reveal them…..then maybe we can stop living with and spreading venereal diseases and emotional drama. Maybe then we can have our children with "the real daddy", and not the one we pretend is the daddy. Keep talking, my Sisters, until you're healed of all the ills our parents raised us with. Then let's get to livin' and lovin' in a way that is life affirming.
This is real talk. A lot of people are living lies in their relationship and desperately want to break free.
Thank you for writing this. I applaud your strength and courage. I was crying when I read it because your story is my story