Stop Taking Your Spouse For Granted!
By Ruth Purple
If there’s one thing that I have learned in this life is you don’t own it. It ca be take away from you without notice or preparation. Therefore, never hesitate to show your affection and love. I remember not so long ago, my good friend Gina went to my office looking very haggard and staring blankly at the wall.
I asked her what happened and her reply really broke my heart. “My husband died of stroke last night, it was all so sudden and I don’t know what to do.” She paused for a while and continued… “If only I could’ve taken care of him more maybe this wouldn’t had happened.
Maybe if I reminded him of his medication or give importance to his diet he would still be here with us. I never even showed him the love that he deserved; it was all so sudden…” she ended up sobbing until she cannot talk anymore. I gave her the biggest hug and showed her my deepest sympathies.
Regret is a very painful emotion to have. Good for you if you had the chance to redeem and save yourself from it but what if you will never get that chance, like in Gina’s case? So before its too late, show your affection because what comes after regret is guilt and guilt can do a lot of damage in your well-being or your life.
So here are some reminders on how to show your affection. To show your affection don’t sweat the small stuff or blow it up. Yes, it can be very annoying if he doesn’t put the toilet sit down or the way he messed up your closet or how his snoring keeps you awake at night.
But these are the things that can be dealt it with in a mild manner; making your partner feel bad because of these trivial things is very unnecessary. Be more considerate and give a lot of respect, listen more, it’s funny that you sometime treat your waiter or your bank teller with more respect than your spouse.
Be kinder than necessary to your partner. Another way to show your affection is by not taking your spouse for granted. Celebrate his birthday, who knows it might be the last one that he’s going to have. Take care of him- if your husband loves to eat, bring him his favorite food, buy him new undergarments (men usually have no time for this) or just do something nice.
To show your affection, you need to learn to forgive. If he done you wrong. Talk to each other and learn to compromise. If you cannot learn to forgive then tell him so and make proper arrangement, don’t keep him hanging around and spend the next 10 years of your married life getting even or alienating him.
See the goodness in each other. People do and can change for the better. It’s just sad that sometimes people see the goodness of their partner when they are already gone. It’s ironic that sometimes people give more respect when the person is already dead rather than he is living.
It’s satirical that sometimes some people appreciate their partner more when he is gone rather than he is alive. Heed my words; when he is gone, the silence in your home can be unbearable and the house that you kill to be nice and tidy will be meaningless without his mess.
Again show your affection while you can- hug more, kiss more, say I love you more because it will be such a tragedy when you finally hugged him but he cannot hug you back. To show your affection try to consider that every moment that you spend with him might be the last moment.
Seize the day and seize your love. Show your affection, don’t hold back.
I had a cousin who lost her husband in a similar way. She wished for the first year after his passing that she told him she loved him more.