Strong Family 101: Do You ‘Give Thanks’ WITH Your Family Consistently?
By Aiyana Ma’at
A few years ago the Creator placed on my heart the need for my husband, Ayize, and I and our children to create a time to come together purely to give thanks to God for all that He has done, is doing and will continue to do in our lives. I expressed what I was feeling to my husband and he was like “Cool”. So profound! Lol.
You may be thinking “Oh, yes this is wonderful. We do it all the time in our family”. And, if you do that’s GREAT. It really does make a profound impact on you and everyone who participates. It’s one of those things that you can’t truly appreciate until you get into the posture of gratitude and experience it. And, I’m not talking about giving thanks together at church or in a public venue outside of the house. I’m not talking about saying “Thank you Lord!” in passing while you’re around your family and I’m not talking about when you bless your food before a meal together. I’m talking about creating a ritual where your family comes to know that, for example, on Monday evenings at 7pm the lights dim a bit, soft meditative music is played to signal to your household that it is time to give thanks, one child knows it’s his job to light the ______candle (whatever you want to call it—unity candle, gratitude candle, etc.), another child knows it’s their job to pour libations, and the life changing power of giving thanks begins.
So, let me pause for a second for those of you who are reading this right now and are thinking “What is the big freaking deal? Is it really that serious? Is having an attitude of gratitude important? Well, I can only speak for myself and my family. Being grateful literally transforms my energy, my atmosphere, and my internal feelings. It just shifts my perception of my life and centers me in what is most important.
Unlockyourhappiness.com has this to say about gratitude:
Is having an attitude of gratitude important?
When it comes to experiencing a better life, Gratitude is considered to be a ‘biggie’. Some of the self-improvement gurus even talk about a Law of Gratitude. Many people keep a daily gratitude journal in which they write up a gratitude list of things to be grateful for that day. And apparently lots of people carry a gratitude rock in their pocket to remind them to express gratitude during the day.
The vibration of gratitude
It is said that having an attitude of gratitude carries with it a vibration that raises one’s own power of positive thinking so that we attract towards us all things good. Our desires are more easily fulfilled, and we experience a happier and healthier life.
Some would regard this as New Age thinking, and dismiss it out of hand. Some believers would say, ‘don’t deny it if you haven’t tried it’.
While I must admit that my family and I haven’t been as consistent as I’d like, it is something that always brings calm, peace, joy, coziness, and the love of God in our home when we do it. I also know that even when my 4 year old is flip flopping all over the place and I have to keep telling my 5 year old to sit down please (in my fake it til you make it sweet mommy voice) they are learning and absorbing from me, my husband, and the atmosphere.
Never underestimate the impact you can have on your family—your kids and your spouse. I, for one, will use as much as I can in any way that I can to influence my family as much as I can. Will you?
BLAM Fam, What are some of the things you do or will start doing with your family to GIVE THANKS? There are so many ways. Share them with us!
Aiyana Ma’at is the wife of Ayize Ma’at, mom of 4, and co-founder and owner of this website, BlackLoveAndMarriage.com, as well as PurposePusher.com. Aiyana is a Seeker, Motivator, Risk Taker, Explorer, & Overcomer. She is a self-described PurposePusher and does her best to live her life with self-awareness and intention. Some of her official titles include licensed psycho-therapist, certified marriage educator & relationship coach and speaker. She is clear that a part of the call on her life is to help bring insight and awareness to others so that they can “get out of their own way” and create the lives they want to have.
I believe that prayer is a necessity in a family's everyday life. Without it, there is destruction. Thank you for this posting. 🙂
I usually keep my thanks and gratitude to myself but it'd be nice to share it with hubby and make it a habit before we build a family.
My recent post Marriage Monday: Divorce is Too Easy
Thank you so much for sharing your lives with us. Your family is such an inspiration to me.
Yes, we play a graditude game sometimes. We go around the room round robin reading from our graditude journals for normal daily stuff or off the top of our heads if we've just had an amazing experience.