Farai Chideya Talks About Dealing With Thanksgiving Family Stress & Relatives That Get On Our Last Nerves
AUDIO: Ahh….Thanksgiving is one day away and many of us are preparing to receive relatives or are on our way to see them. There’s nothing like family to bring back warm & fuzzy memories, remind us of what’s important in life, and bring out the child in us. There’s also nothing like family to kick up old issues, remind us of why we only see some folks a few times each year, and bring the “I’m a grown ass (wo)man dammit!” out of us.
Thanksgiving can be wonderful, nostalgic, and healing to our souls but it can be downright stressful as well. Listen in to this NPR interview where Farai Chideya talks with humorist Brian Copeland, the star of the one man show “Not a Genuine Black Man,” and psychiatrist Ivan Walks, about ways of dealing with holiday anxiety.
CLICK HERE FOR AUDIO: 01 Dealing with Holiday Family Stress 1
To Read the transcript of this discussion, CLICK HERE.
We started out alternating houses. Then there were times we decided to celebrate in our house alone. You have to do what is best for your household. Family will learn how to adapt and adjust. You teach people how to treat you and they too will learn to move on. (hopefully) My parents are here this year. We asked all family members to contribute a dish instead of one person doing all of the work. We learned to work through the past issues and now family time is absolutely wonderful. Forgiveness, love, taking the high road, and simply accepting people for who they are works wonders. Once you know and understand people, you know what to expect from them. Happy Thanksgiving everyone and take the time to share with others what you are grateful for.
Since we are Newly Weds!! Last Year we went to My Wife's Family for ThankTaking. This Year It is with My Family. My Ultimate goal is to be able to bring both Families together under one roof so that we wouldn't have to pick and choose where to go. It will get frustrating and it will get old attempting to compromise and make others happy with your presence. I Love Spending Time with Both Of Our Families because that's how I was raised in a family oriented enviornement may not have been the perfect family settings but we were together. So as a Husband I Feel It is My Duty to Unite Both Families to Co Exist together in the same fashion as many of Our Afrikan Ancestors have Done. I didn't have the intention that it would only be at our wedding that both families shared the same space.
My family is very dysfunctional but my husband's is like the cleavers on leave it to beaver. If I had it my way though I'd rather be around my family 99% of the time because pretense and pretend perfection is not my cup of tea. But, I'm learning to put my marriage first like the Ma'at's teach. It ain't easy.
I've been married for 6 years now and from day 1 my husband and I decided that we would alternate whose family's house we would go to each year. But, every year that we don't go to my mom's she acts all sad and runs a guilt trip on me just for doing what's best for my family. I usually break down and find a way to get over there and spend some time with her and that side of the family (and no she is not lonely….there are LOTS of folks over there ALL the time)
I'm resolving not to do that this year. I'm just too tired!