Sex Is Better In Somebody Else’s Bed

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By Ericka So’uter

Hey, did you hear the story about the married couple who had too much sex? Of course you didn’t. That’s one problem married people do not have, especially the ones with kids.

Still, we all manage to squeeze in some sexy time, but not without major effort. It’s not easy to go from housework (dishes, laundry, picking gum out of the carpet) to hot and bothered during the typical day.

But a new survey by Zoosk.com promises that mind-blowing sex is just an airplane ride away.  In the poll, 69% or men and 72% of women say sex on vacation is way better than sex at home. To that, I say “Ah, Duh!” Here’s why.

It has nothing to do with sandy beaches or sun. It has everything to do with solitude — which only happens if you are smart enough to leave the kids at home with grandma. Think about it, no one feels sexy after changing a diaper filled with runny poo. And nothing kills the mood quicker than watching a toddler pick his nose or having to play ref between two grumpy, hormonal tweens. Forgetting all those pesky parenting responsibilities for a day — or five — is the ultimate mommy R&R.

And with time away, I guarantee you will remember all the reasons why you fell for your man in the first place. Imagine having a conversation that has NOTHING to do with potty training, report cards, or his neglecting to take out the trash…AGAIN!

Though, 15% of people did say they worried about running out of things to talk about while on vacation. My advice? Try dirty talk. If it doesn’t get you in the mood, it’s a least worth a few giggles. Point is, relax.

CLICK HERE to read more.

How Often Do You “Love” Yourself? – 7 Signs You Masturbate Too Much

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By Dan Drake

Yes, I said it. Masturbation. It’s one of those things most of us rarely talk about publically but most of us have done or continue to do privately. Exploring our sexuality is a normal part of our development, and masturbation is a typical part of this journey.

If masturbation is so common, why is it so hard to talk about? If it is a normal part of sexual development, how come we can’t talk about it openly with our friends and family?

There are perhaps as many answers to this question as there are people on earth, but the simple answer is this: masturbation is typically a solitary behavior. Many people learn to masturbate when they are at an awkward, insecure phase of development. Consequently, it becomes a behavior that’s done in secret. Add to this a family, community, or faith tradition that labels masturbation as bad, and we can come to view masturbation as shameful. Even our over-sexualized society stigmatizes masturbation.

Have you ever found yourself laughing uncomfortably when someone brings up the word in conversation? Are you painfully aware of how many times I’ve written the word masturbation so far?

Here are a few warning signs that your masturbation might be entering unhealthy territory:

1. You masturbate to the point of self-injury. There is no magical number of times in a week or amount of time masturbating that is optimal, but if you masturbate to the point where you are harming yourself, chances are you are doing it compulsively.

2. You feel the need to masturbate successively. If you simply need a physiological release, once should suffice. If you masturbate three, four or ten times successively this will most likely indicate that you are using masturbation to medicate emotions or escape. This should be a clue to check in with yourself and see how you’re using masturbation.

3. It is interfering with your relationships. Are you single and use masturbation as a way of avoiding intimacy or putting yourself out there romantically? Are you married or in a committed relationship and find masturbation preferable to engaging your partner for sex? Have your partners expressed concern about your masturbation habits? For some, it can feel far less threatening to turn to masturbation rather than intimacy, fears of rejection or abandonment, and connection. If used in this way, masturbation can sidetrack relational intimacy.

4. Masturbation negatively impacts how you feel about yourself. When you masturbate, are you more in touch with your body, your sensations, and your spirituality, or do you feel more numb, lonely, and spiritually disconnected? If you feel less connected after masturbating, you might want to take a look at what role masturbation is playing for you.

5. You feel shame about it. Whether the shame is surfacing because of your religious beliefs, societal messages, or family views, shame can be extremely damaging. Shame frequently leads to even further secrecy and maintaining a double life where you look good on the outside but don’t feel so good on the inside. It is really important to talk to someone about this shame, since it typically deepens over time.

CLICK HERE to read more.

4 Types Of Sex You Definitely Want To Have

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By Sinclair

#1 – Sex after Abstaining
Some things are worth waiting for, including mindblowing sex. While the qualifications for incredible intimacy vary, for many new couples, the wait period is often dependent upon having gone on “x” number of dates, having been together for a certain length of time, or having fallen hopelessly in love.

Equally wait-worthy: holding out for super sex once you’ve started sleeping together, as Mike*, knows: “I was going out with a girl and knew that we’d get better in bed with time – and we did. At first, we were all elbows and over-thinking. I knew she wasn’t letting herself go. But slowly, we fell into stride and things were amazing. Most guys don’t realize that much of a woman’s sexual pleasure comes in having a strong comfort level with her man.”

While temporary abstinence isn’t for everyone, there are benefits to holding off on all out intercourse. Comfort is key for both partners in having phenomenal sex, and this is often based on familiarity, how good you feel about the relationship, and whether or not you hold the same sexual values.

Furthermore, stoking the flames of your libidinal desires for a prolonged period of time can make for even hotter action when the two of you finally do decide to go all of the way. Couples just have to make sure that they’re on the same page with this type of sex, which can only be done through intimate discussions, where you share what sex means to you and the role you want it to play in your relationship.

This is especially important in making sure that a partner doesn’t misread a lack of sex for a lack of interest, because for most this is certainly not the case. There are simply lovers who believe the tortoise does win the race when it comes to sexual relationship success.

Waiting for great sex is not always easy, but good things do come to those who wait. A little bit of patience can make for major rewards, allowing you to focus on other intimate joys, a.k.a. coping mechanisms, like erotic massages or oral sex, until you’re ready for fireworks that will have you both hungering for more.

#2 – Kiss & Make Up Sex 
Nothing can get you in the mood like a good… fight? That’s right – when you argue, your pulse soars, making you feel warmer, charged, and more alive. While not an ideal form of foreplay, the best part about fighting with your partner is, hands down, the make up sex. It is unquestionably the sweetest way to end your argument and keep your relationship in perspective, helping you to appreciate what you have to lose.

“I find it very healing,” shares Stella.* “It tends to be really good and more passionate. Make up sex reinforces our love and need for each other and why we’re staying together, trying to make things work out no matter what. When I’m back in his arms after a heated argument, I feel safe – and a huge sense of relief.”

 With lovers’ guards down, make up sex can be some of the most lustful loving ever known. In fact, some people, like Aaron*, have intentionally sought out such sex for its aphrodisiac qualities – it’s that good:“I was dating this woman whom I would intentionally piss off so that when we had make up sex she would “get out of her head” and have unbridled fun. For example, if we were in the kitchen, I would start complaining that she didn’t know how to cook. Even though she was an aspiring Donna Reed, I’d intentionally start riding her about not being a world class chef. I knew it pressed her buttons. This would inevitably lead to her trying to “one up me”. These little arguments over frivolous things created great sexual tension.”
*note* By no means are we at BLAM advocating creating issues so that you can have make up sex.  We simply want you to know that make up sex can be GREAT sex.

Few would argue that makeup sex isn’t necessary, if not downright hot, in getting back to a better place after a fight. The trick can be, though, how to initiate it. If you’re the one who has been wronged or upset during a spat, you’ve got it easy – you can just march over to your lover and state, “I forgive you,” before going in for a smooch.

If you’re the person in trouble, however, you’ve got your work cut out for you. So in expressing your “I’m sorry,” be sure to buy flowers for your love with a thoughtful card, or send an email or IM the next time you know your love is online, acknowledging you’re a dolt and asking if there’s any way you can make it up – in bed.

You can also simply take her hand, kiss it, and ask for forgiveness. You can rub his shoulders, kiss the top of his head, and ask him if you can just get past this. Basically, think about how you can charm your way back into your love’s good graces. And more than anything, don’t try to push matters. Your partner’s anger will wear off eventually, but will have to run its course – you can’t force making things okay again, including doing that with a roll in the hay.

#3 – Only Give or Only Receive Sex 
‘Tis better to give than to receive is more than just a cliché. Many lovers thrive off of the one-way gesture, where one partner pleases the other to no end, getting nothing in return, for the mere fact that it is nothing but nice. The one-way is among the easiest ways to shake things up and show your partner how much you appreciate him, how much you love her, and how much you really value the other’s pleasuring and happiness, as was the case for Adele*:

“The love of my life is amazing to me in so many ways – kind, generous, and selfless. So I decided to surprise him one night at 4:23 am by slipping into a very sexy new piece of lingerie. I lit a few candles, rubbed my hands with a lotion he loves, and began my “THANK YOU” using only touch and no words. It was a very erotic experience for both of us, and a way to show him that I enjoy pleasing as much as I enjoy being pleased!”

To make sure that your partner doesn’t feel guilty and attempt to return the favor, let him know that this moment is all about him. Tell her that she can show her gratitude at a later date. Stress that this is all about your love’s pleasure and nothing else – and if you’re the receiver, relax and enjoy it!

While it can be difficult being the sole focus of attention, especially in that it can make you feel vulnerable, you must allow yourself to surrender to the sensations being lavished upon you. It is as important to be a good receiver as it is to be a giver. We get a lot out of doting on our lovers, fulfilling their every need and pleasure.

After all, the one-way helps you to totally tune into your partner, breeding generosity and taking your intimacy to a higher level. The action is no longer about “me” and what can “I” get out of this, but is about selflessly loving the other, even when you’re too tired to be intimate, want something low key, or not in the mood. Ultimately, it’s a gesture with many happy returns.

CLICK HERE to read more.

 

 

 

My Husband’s Confession

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By Lana Moline

I asked my husband out on a lunch date with the intent of interviewing him to find out something that I perhaps did not know.  After many years of marriage, I will admit that my creativity has matured but in all of my years writing, this was my first time thinking of this.  It was so cute because he was excited and a little nervous.  I think he was sold when I told him that we were eating at one of our favorite restaurants and I was treating.

The nice thing for me is that it brought me back to when we dated.  When I got dressed, I looked past all the comfortable clothes that I wear often and came out with something fierce because I wanted to make sure he did a double take – and he did.  From the moment we were seated, he stared uncontrollably to the point that I blushed through my interview.  So here’s the thing.  I asked him a series of questions just to get a feel for what he was thinking but truth be told,  my plan was to hear his answer to only one question which is “why do you love me?”

We spoke about his goals which were consistent with what I already know of him.  He shared his vision for our family and that warmed my heart and he even dropped some knowledge about the key to relationships.  He said that “relationships thrive when there is a shared interest, a joy for spending time together, mutual respect and a spirit of cooperativeness.”  That moment reminded me that he is a cool dude who is just fun to hang out with and that’s when I asked my question.  It went something like this:

Me:  Why do you love me?

Him:  Because you are brilliant, attractive, smart and kind

Me:  Why do you love me?

Him:  (Without hesitation) Because you are beautiful, considerate and ambitious

Me:  Why do you love me? (I asked 3 times in a row)

Him:  (On cue) Because you are a good cook, you love music and have a desire to grow.

The more I asked, the more answers he had for me.  Although I had set out to find out something that I didn’t know, my entire date reminded me of what I was sure of – He loves me.

Ask your someone special to share why they feel the way that they do about you.  I promise you, it will make the world of difference in your life and in your relationship.  Let me know how it works out for you.

Lana Moline is an integral part of the Blackloveandmarriage.com writing team, freelance writer and poet who lives in Ft. Worth with her three kids and husband Emile. Married 11 years, both media professionals have vowed to maintain integrity in all aspects of print and broadcast journalism.Visit her atLana Moline Speaks.

Will Sex Get Him To Commit?

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By Kim Conant

You may imagine that agreeing to have sex before you have a monogamous commitment from a man could lead to the commitment you seek. Wrong. If he gets to have sex with you before commitment, you lose some of your power to get him to commit. After all, why should he commit further if he’s already having sex with you? Yes, you may answer, but with sexual intimacy he’ll fall for me even more. Wrong again. With sexual intimacy before commitment, all you know is that his cock is in love with your vagina. You are beautiful, feminine, and have a gorgeous, fully shaved vagina. Of course, he’s in love with your sexual organs! What man wouldn’t be? But you want his love for you to come before his love for your sexual organs. My husband loves me (and tells me) and loves my sexual organs and tells me. But he had to like and love and commit to me first, before he got to experience mine, which he instantly loved, too.

By the way, “instant commitments” don’t count. If you’ve teased him to the point of nakedness or of being only an undergarment away from nakedness, and then ask him, “You do love me, don’t you?” do not be fooled by the answer “Of course I do.” That is his manhood talking. At this point his brain has been kidnapped by his throbbing manhood. All his brain blood now resides in his swollen one, and his is totally in charge of what his mouth says. “Of course I love you” means “Of course I love your sexual organs.” If you let a Good Man have sex with you before commitment, you risk losing that Good Man because you were too easy; you weren’t selective or demanding enough.

Be patient. Get the commitment first. You need to have sex only with a committed Good Man.

It may take you several weeks or several months of dating a man to determine whether you want to have sex with him. This is not an unreasonable time frame for such an important decision. Again, it is totally appropriate to share your thoughts with a man regarding your qualifications of a Good Man and your fundamental needs. Also discuss how he sees your relationship, both now and in the future. If you decide that sex with this man is appropriate for you, then mutually commit to monogamy and go for it. If he is unwilling to commit to monogamy, do not agree to have sex with him.

Kim Conant, the author of Sex Secrets of an American Geisha: How to Attract, Satisfy, and Keep Your Man, Hunter House Publishers. Looking for relationship, dating and sex tips? Visit Py’s website at http://www.AmericanGeishaHouse.com. 

Are You A Flirt: 10 Signals That Say You’re Interested

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By: Sundaresh Shivaswami

Not only are there specific signs of flirtatious behavior in men and women, there are actually five stages of flirting.

The ten signs of flirting below are part of the nonverbal communication or body language that men and women often send each other.

Some experts say 90% of communication is nonverbal. We send nonverbal messages through body language and flirting to attract people of the opposite sex for a romantic dalliance…or to communicate that we’re not interested. Flirting isn’t all about sexual innuendo and attracting possible mates: babies flirt with their parents to ensure survival and people in the service industry flirt with their customers.

Reading body language is an important way to communicate with others and pick up on their unspoken signals. Whether you’ve spotted an attractive stranger across the room, are on a first date, or have been married for decades, these signs of flirting will help you decipher nonverbal body language and cues. These flirting signals are common, and often unconscious.

10 Signs of Flirting in Men and Women

Flirting is all about sending messages or nonverbal communication.

  1. Raised eyebrows. Research shows that when a potential mate appears, people raise their eyebrows slightly. This sign of flirting can be an unconscious sign of interest on the flirter’s part.
  2. Eye contact. You know she’s interested when she not only makes eye contact, but holds it for a significant amount of time. If you’re across the room from one another, regular brief instances of eye contact may be strong signs of flirting.
  3. Hair flick. Women will flick their hair – you see this in movies all the time. Even women with really short hair can flick their hair. Remember Cameron Diaz in the first Charlie’s Angels movie? Total hair flick after she met the bartender – and her hair was almost as short as his!
  4. Playing with accessories. This signal from the opposite sex involves playing with earrings, twirling hair, and fiddling with necklaces. Men may offer similar signs of flirting: playing with their neckties or jingling the change in their pocket.
  5. Leaning in. If he leans close to you, he’s giving you a nonverbal message that he wants to be closer (this may seem to be an obvious sign of flirting, but it’s often misread).
  6. Open body language. This is a significant sign of flirting for both men and women. The opposite of open body language (closed body language, which is easier to describe) is turning away, crossing arms or legs, or pulling back.
  7. Sideways glances. You’ve seen the demure sideways glances – and perhaps you’ve even thrown a few. When you’re attracted to someone, it can be difficult to meet their eyes. Sideways glances are a strong sign of flirting.
  8. Looking at lips or body parts. When you find yourself looking at his lips or jaw, you may be sending a flirting signal. This may be an unconscious sign of flirting – when you’re attracted to someone, you can’t help but to check out their assets!
  9. Laughter. You laugh at their jokes, no matter how silly or unfunny. This sign of flirting isn’t all about attracting mates. Laughter can endear you to your boss or babysitter, which may make them acquiesce to your requests.
  10. Light touches. This is a fairly obvious sign of flirting. Lightly touching someone’s arm, knee or shoulder shows interest. It’s a nonverbal signal that you’re open and friendly.

A lot of people feel flirting is part of the universal language of how we communicate, especially nonverbally,” says Dr Jeffry Simpson of the University of Minnesota. “With a lot of it, especially the nonverbal stuff, people may not be fully aware that they’re doing it. People may emit flirtatious cues and not be fully aware of how powerful they are.”

Sex and Pregnancy: From A Woman’s Point Of View

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By Shayla Moore

Let’s get one thing clear, there’s no such thing as ‘normal’ when it comes to your feelings! Every woman will feel differently about sex and intimacy during her pregnancy, and if you feel a certain way then 9 times out of 10 do what you want (or don’t want) to do. Some women find they become even more randy when they’re pregnant, whereas some aren’t interested at all. Whatever feels right for you, go with it. There are a few physical conditions to consider, but as far as emotion goes, there’s no right or wrong way to ‘be pregnant’.

If you want sex,

Pregnancy is a time for wildly fluctuating hormones, these may make you feel surprisingly horny! If you do, there’s no reason to stop having sex, so long as your pregnancy is normal. However, you may have to make a few changes to your sex life as your term progresses. The missionary position is likely to be difficult or impossible as your bump gets bigger, you could try lying on your side with the belly supported, or go ‘doggie style’. This means you’ve got more freedom to move and can feel more in control. Now is a good time to experiment with different positions and lots of pillows, you may need to prop up your body. Many men find pregnant women particularly erotic, enjoy the attention if your man gets suddenly horny! Also, regular sex can help prepare your pelvic muscles for a smooth birth and your hormones often mean vaginal lubrication is better than ever before.

And if you don’t,

It’s not uncommon for women to go off sex as they start to feel ‘more mother than lover’. Often, towards the later stages of pregnancy sex may become more difficult simply because of the bump getting in the way, you may prefer other forms of intimate touch than full sex. If you’re experiencing discomfort or pain you should let your partner know and try other ways to relax together. Many women enjoy massage as a way to relax and feel close to their partner, just remember that during labor you should avoid highly scented oils or lotions. Touch and physical contact is an essential part of a relationship, and just because you don’t feel like having sex doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy sensual feelings.

Things to check

If yours is a ‘high risk’ pregnancy (check with your doctor or care-giver), you may be advised to avoid sex, particularly in the later stages of pregnancy. This includes a history of premature labor, miscarriage or other complications. Opinion is divided as to whether sex and orgasm can influence labor, again, check with your care giver if you’re unsure. As far as sex toys go, generally speaking using vibrators externally should present no problem but is best avoided inside the vagina.

About the Author Shayla Moore is a writer for http://www.oasislingerie.com She has many intresting topics and ideas for all to read about. Check out more of her articles.

Kinky Is O.K. With Me – 15 Tips To Spice Up Your ‘Vanilla’ Sex Life

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By Aunt Becky

Sex, especially when you have it with the same person every time, well, it can get a little … old. Sometimes, you gotta dig deep and figure out how to spice up your sex life. I have a suggestion for you: add a little kink to your vanilla sex!

Here are some easy ways to “get kinky with it” (it takes two).

1) Buy a blindfold, or use one of his neckties, to cover his eyes when he gets home. Lead him to the bedroom and have your way with him.

2) Use the necktie to tie his hands to the headboard of your bed so he can look, but not touch. Great way to start a sexy strip-tease.

3) Speaking of sexy strip-teases, why not try one out? Pull out the patent-leather f*ck me boots and get twirling and whirling around your guy.

4) Grab the tallest pair of boots you own, put those and some sexy lace undies on, and when he gets home from work, meet him in the hallway, shove him against the wall, andtell him he’s been a naughty boy — and he needs to please YOU tonight.

5) Grab a full-length mirror — one of those cheap ones from Target will do — and position it so that he can watch you as you go down on him.

6) Use the mirror to watch yourselves as you have sex.

7) Make a sex tape. Just be sure YOU are the only one in possession of it.

8) Watch the sex tape as a pre-game to get you both in the mood to do it again.

9) Try sexy spanking – it’s a hell of a lot more fun that it sounds.

10) Get into some mutual masturbation. Side-by-side. Not much is hotter than starting a hot night off with some mutual masturbation.

CLICK HERE to read more.

Sexual Healing: 6 Health Benefits From Having Sex With Your Spouse

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by The 1 Ms. H.B.I.C. Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up; let’s make love tonight. Get up, get up, get up, get up; cause you do it right! Marvin Gaye was on to something with his 1982 hit Sexual Healing. Sex can heal or prevent certain ailments. Having sexual intercourse with your spouse is a wonderful and beautiful way to bond. I know that most women are stimulated mentally and if things aren’t right in the relationship, they lose the urge to have sex. However, most men are the opposite. Men are stimulated visually. And, I’ve recently heard that it’s a scientific fact that sperm builds up in the testicles every 72 hours. So ladies, now you see why men want to have sex more than you do, in some cases. Instead of moaning and groaning about it, choose to flip the script and reap the many benefits that Sexual Healing can offer:

#1. Ladies, the next time you have a headache and your spouse wants to have sex, don’t turn him down. Did you know that having an orgasm may relieve that headache for you? It works for men too. Immediately before orgasm, your hormone oxytocin levels rise higher than its normal levels. This releases endorphins which can eliminate most headache pains.

2. Sex is a form of exercise therefore you will burn calories and lose weight. Sex also increases testosterone and that can lead to stronger muscles and bones. Your heart beat raises from 70 beats per minute to 150 beats per minute when you are sexually stimulated and aroused. That’s alot of calorie burning!

3. Sex can reduce the risk of heart disease. Researchers from Queens University conducted a study in 2001 that focused on cardiovascular health. Their studies showed that men who have sex 3 or more times a week cut their risk of having a heart attack or stroke in half.

4. Sex makes you happy. At least it should! 🙂 Sexually active couples enjoy life more. And, Dr. Oz, of the Dr. Oz Show, says that having a healthy sex life with your spouse will actually help you live longer.

5. Sex can reduce stress. Studies have shown that after you orgasm your muscles relax. Those same studies also show that couples who engage in sexual intercourse frequently, fulfilling their urges at least twice a week, are less anxious, violent and hostile. It can be considered the perfect tool to find relaxation and comfort after a long strenuous day at work.

6. Last but not least, sex can boost your immune system. Now, this is only if you are having safe sex in a monogamous relationship, preferably marriage. Orgasms can increase our infection-fighting cells up to 20% says Dr. Dudley Chapman, clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Ohio University College of Osteopathic Medicine in Athens, Ohio.

Sexual pleasure isn’t all fun and games. It can actually improve your individual physical and emotional well-being and definitely improve your physical and emotional well-being as a couple. Continue to strive for the best fulfilling, monogamous relationship you can have. It benefits us more than we know. 😉

B Intentional Family, Did you know there was so much to gain from making love to your spouse? Are there any benefits I misssed? Share what you get physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually from connecting sexually with the one you love.

The 1 Ms. H.B.I.C. (Head Beauty In Charge) is the founding owner of Real Talk With The 1 H. B. I. C., a full entertainment blog site. She is passionate about love and life! Follow her on Twitter.com/the1mshbic or contact her at The1ms.hbic@realtalkwiththe1hbic.com.

Are You Sleeping With A Stranger?

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By Ruth Purple

Another year has come by, and with this, you cannot help but to assess certain things, like how you’ve done the previous year, in your career, your relationship with your friends, your growth as a person. You try to see if you have really grown, financially, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. From this you try to set new goals again for the new year, to get that promotion, to buy that car, to go to that country, to have that amount in your bank. It is human nature to yearn stability, but with today’s career- driven world, your romantic relationship hardly gets the attention it needs, and before you know it, you don’t really know the person you are sleeping with.

Here are some signs that you have not been giving the right attention to your marriage.

Your partner surprises you… and not in a romantic way. Before you finish each other sentences and you “just know” what you husband is all about. But lately, you are surprised with what he is up to or what he is all about.

What you need to do: Give each other a moment. Set time every day where you and your spouse can talk about what happened during the day. This could be during breakfast or dinner, or the time when you are getting to bed. Give at least an hour or two talking about what went through your day or his day.

You don’t know his friends or have any friend in common. All the while you thought he was hanging out with his childhood buddy, whatsisname, but lately, you found see strangers in your living room, and in the garage with your honey-bunch, then take this as a red- flag that you have not been giving your relationship the attention it needs.

What you need to do: Ask your partner to go out, hang out, grab some beer and bring his friends along, and your friends along. While it is also healthy that you give each other time apart, it is not good for your relationship to go around with different circles. See to it that you know who his friends are, and that he interacts with your friends, too. Having friends in common is healthy for your relationship.

Your talks are all about obligation, if not chores. This usually happens to long- term couples. This is where your partner has become your roommate or housemate, who has to split the bill and work load around the house.

What you need to do: while obligation and chores help the house running smoothly, it can also put your relationship on the rough spot when put this as the centre of your relationship. Relationships are not about chores and obligations, give time to nurture your partner’s emotions.

Your sex life has become stale, or is non- existent. This may creep you out, because you swore when your relationship was young that you will not become that couple who never had sex, but now, you see yourself being that couple, where sex has become a special- occasion chore, or that thing you need to do every Friday or Saturday night before the late night weekend news comes on.

Aiming to be successful is great, but try to assess what comprises or defines success, because you might be heading the wrong way, and before you know it, you are losing the most valuable aspect in your life.