How To Manage Conflict In Your Marriage

By Ian Williamson

No matter how happy a married couple looks like, their marriage is not without occasional conflicts. Having conflicts in marriage life is normal. It isbrought about by the natural differences of the couple. However, if the gravity and frequency of conflicts inside a marriage keeps on elevating to new heights, the risk of destroying the marriage is always there.

Managing conflict is an important ingredient of a healthy marriage. Listed below are some conflict management tools which apply to different situations related to conflict resolutions inside marriage.

-Mind the person, not the differences

Most often than not, serious marriage conflicts are related to smaller things that add up and eventually burst. Marriage entails that the spouses love each other for who they are and small annoying things should be taken for granted. Understanding each other especially with little things will help trengthen the relationship and give a general sense of belongingness to both the spouses.

-Do not compare

It is never a good idea to compare your spouse with the spouse of others, even if it is intended for fun. The grass ain’t greener on the other side of the fence. There’s good and bad in all people, but the problem is that people tend to see the bad traits in their spouses. Marriage means belongingness and spouses should make their partners feel that they belong together.

-Stay in love

Entering in marriage does not mean the end of fun. Couples tend to be more serious when they enter in marriage, thus, leaving out all the passion and the fun. Keeping the feeling of being in love is the main foundation of a successful marriage.  However happy a couple is inside a marriage, there will come a time when they will face conflicts. But being in conflict with each other is not the end of it all. Here is some more useful advice in dealing with conflicts in marriage.

-Control instincts

People tend to resort to anger, hatred and disrespect when confronting their partners. Remember that conflict resolution does not necessarily have to entail violence and hurt. Talking with an open heart and an unclouded mind will really help resolve the conflict.

-Reaffirm one another

Couples should reaffirm their willingness to resolve the conflict by saying in their own words what the other one is saying and act according to the resolutions which were made.  Differences do not necessarily have to end in conflicts and conflicts do not necessarily have to end in a cold and heartless marriage.   Always find love in marriage and everything will fall in place.

3 replies
  1. Nancy
    Nancy says:

    Going from 0-10 is easy for a lot of people. It is so crucial to find ways to counteract the rapid rise in heart rate and the steam filling up inside. Sometimes i could just scream. What good would it do? Control your instincts control your instincts control your instincts.

  2. Rael
    Rael says:

    Excellent post!!! Although making comparisons is a part of human nature, I had to learn the hard way that my husband don't want to hear about what another husband is doing.

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