Men Are Not Dogs….We Are Vultures (At Least Some Of Us That Is)
By llex Bien-aime
Something All women Should Know-An Unfortunate Truth.
My wife and I are talking about having a baby soon. She is so excited about the potential of having little girls, while I on the other hand only want sons. She thinks that I don’t want daughters because they will have me wrapped around their little fingers but that’s not quite it – I just don’t want my future daughters to deal with the Vultures that will surely come their way.
Yes, fellas – I am calling us Vultures. Men, like Vultures, are animals who prey on others. The Vulture seeks to attack weaker animals for the sake of fulfilling their own gain and as men, we are no different. They say that Vultures seldom attack healthy animals. Do we not do the same? We generally seek easy targets and women with some type of self esteem issue. I am sure by now healthy women would have noticed that many men stay away because if what we are looking for requires too much work to accomplish, we move on to an easier target.
I know that women do not like to hear a man call them weak and some of them think themselves to be stronger than they really are but that false belief opens women up to becoming lambs to the slaughter. Some confuse being well-educated, gainfully employed, and generally self sufficient as a protection against the Vulture but in all honesty, most men find that these things only mask other insecurities women have.
I am no clinical physiologist but the term “daddy issues” is real. So many women are trying to find love in the wrong places and in many cases will do some strange things to get it. They think that their actions will win the Vulture over, but it does not. The goal of the Vulture is to attack – and what better victim is there than a woman trying to win a man over while he does nothing to win her over. At that very moment (just like a vulture), it is as if he is flying in the desert and spots you from miles away. He can see the desperation of your actions in the same way that the Vulture can see the fatigue of the dying animal. In that very moment he knows that you are safe for the attack!
I agree.SOME men are both.I do have some issues but I'm not a vulture or a dog.
Wow! This article is just what I needed. I have been heartbroken for the past few months because after years of washing my hands of relationships, being celibate and alone by choice, I let my friends talk me into joining a dating web-site. I disabled my account after only a few months for a couple of reasons, but not before buying the line of bs that one of the guys sold me. I'm not blaming him for that because I am a grown woman, and I fell for it (even thought I thought I was waaaaaay above doing so) He seemed so perfect and I really liked just about everything about him (sadly, although I hate to admit it, I still like him.)__Anyway after 5 months of taking our time to get to know each other online and by text/phone etc. we finally met in person (he lives in another state). After what I thought was a great weekend, he changed into another person. Communications slowed to a crawl, and eventually I realized I had been played. He never really wanted to get to know me, just wanted to 'hook up' I have been so sad for the past few months as I work to get over this/him.
"He can see the desperation of your actions in the same way that the Vulture can see the fatigue of the dying animal. In that very moment he knows that you are safe for the attack!"
So true.. I have been that dying animal in the past. Ladies if you find yourself being a constant victim of vultures, maybe it's time for a little self love.
Ps I apologize. I meant clinical psychologist. This iPad is always changing words for me.
I enjoyed this piece…I've actually been thinking about this topic all night long; I grew up fatherless and I'd be lying to say that his absence didn't leave me subject to some foolish behavior in my relationships. Moreover, most "Vultures" are men who were also Fatherless and so they are only acting out the behavior they know to be true to them….it's so imperative to restructure black men and women to a sense of unity and family.
As the author of this piece, I will try to address the comments made. I will do the best I can to teach my sons not to be Vultures as well as teach my daughters that Vultures do exist. This article is not to disrespect black men as I am a black man myself. I know that men at one time or another have predatory ways about us. Most of us grow out of it and maybe SOME of us never have them but the law of averages shows that there are more predators than not. If this is not you, than cool. If this is not for you than cool. This is something that I wrote based on the many conversations with my female friends. Just trying to save some women from a great deal of heartache!
This makes a lot of sense. I observed a "vulture" in action just this past weekend. It happened right in front of me at a jazz festival. I felt so sorry for the "prey". The young woman became so agitated and tried so hard; she was about to cry for his attention. Initially, he refused to even acknowledge her after awhile and played the "angry" game. He gave in after his male friends persuaded him to stop behaving this way (for at least now). As for the young woman, you could tell she had low self-esteem issues.
Well he is correct in saying that he is "no clinical physiologist". I see what he is saying but I just don't like when it even appears that all men are put in one little neat category and that covers all of them. And besides, what difference is a name change? Dog, Ho, Vulture, predator etc. They all are negative and makes us look like we all are animals with no sense of meaning or purpose or the ability to simply love, honor and cherish our wives, girlfriends or significant others. I know that he spoke the truth for some brothers, but keep my name out of it. IRONICALLY, I am glad that I don't have any daughters (two sons) because I do know that Vultures do exist. lol lol.
Here we go with another beating up on black men piece. I take offense to being called a vulture. I am Divine. I think if we begin with that understanding in mind we can lift up black women and honor ourselves in the process.
The author didn’t say all men. I know for a fact that I’m not one so I took no offence to it…I’m fact, I believe the statement to be true considering how many of the dudes I know are vultures
*in fact
"what better victim is there than a woman trying to win a man over while he does nothing to win her over"
Profoundly true statement. I was married to one for over six years. Thank God I got away before he completely devoured me.
Great piece!
This article is on point. There are many vultures in the world and it is rightly said that neither education, money nor status will fix an internal illness. Predators can smell and easily spot a sick animal. If the author is worried about having daughters than he should teach them the truth, the only intermal stability, wholeness and wellness can fend off vultures. I'm concerned about the author having sons because he may raise them to be future vultures.
As a woman, I agree with this article. I used to wonder why my more unfortunate sisters would let men bed them with no commitment and cheat on them with other women. Then when he's decided he's had enough of her, he leaves! Other women never have these problems. The issue is the woman's self esteem. My husband and I deliberately spoil our only child – a daughter. We've treated her so well that when anyone tries to mistreat her, she knows it immediately. She doesn't suffer through it, either, after a warning, if it continues, she leaves them where they stand. Just like her mother!
My sisters, people will treat you how you treat yourself. Don't date until you can treat yourself well and know that you deserve it!
VERY inspired by this article to be honest w/me. Thanx for this!
As much as I hate to admit it……a lot of what was said here is true. I'm guilty of being a vulture
Wow Sirius…a welcome refreshing honesty statement…Thanks for being honest. Recently I was almost duped by a Vulture..this guy was a true scam artist, too (like one of those Nigerian lottery letters guy but the romantic kind…getting women to fall in love with him and then asking for money. (He calls himself James Cook btw) anyway, I luckily found out about his scam before I didn't anything stupid but I felt foolish for thinking I was in "love.." I told my friend (a guy) and he preceded to explain to me how guy's lie to get what they want and have no problem doing it. I don't know why but I find it so difficult to believe that another human being would just lie like that so boldy, take advantage of someone's need to be loved just to get some – whatever…but they do. But I refuse to lose my faith in people…despite the vultures I run into. 🙂