Am I Setting Myself Up To Be Cheated On By Asking My Man To Wait Til Marriage For Sex?


Video: I am a 21 year old female who all of a sudden got the idea to wait.  But every time i turn around people like to point out how impossible that is …..not for me but for the guy. They say even if he waits for me he will still get “it” somewhere else. I’m young and the people around me are young. I’m not really sure if i have some unrealistic expectation or what. I guess my question to you both would be is waiting until marriage unrealistic? Can a man stay completely faithful the whole time? My idea to wait is not set in stone so please give it to me straight.

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18 replies
  1. Elle
    Elle says:

    Listen to your heart. I bet it was your heart that gave you the idea. Don't stop listening to everbody else. Instead tell them to shut the hell up. A man will wait for you and while he is waiting he will not cheat. You are worth that and deserve it. Imagine what will happen between a man and you that sees your value and wants honor your worth. Go ahead imagine. What other woman came into view. Not a one. Wait to hear from your heart again then follow it. Act a damn fool wit anybody dat is telling you something other than what your heart says. Go on, do it.
    My recent post WHERE IS THE BEST MUSIC COMING FROM?

  2. Nosa Ihama
    Nosa Ihama says:

    I agree with all the comments. But realistically, A man can Say he’s ok with it but then still sleeps round without you knowing it, and you feel u re both on d same page but actually aren’t !!!!
    Just saying

  3. Angel Counelis
    Angel Counelis says:

    AMEN!!! I am 23 going to be Ending a relationship due to him being a manipulator and I am going to wait until I get married to ever make love to a man! If he loves me he will wait! And if not I will know right off at that time that he is not the MAN for me! By weather he waits or not! If he chooses not to then he's not my guy!!!

  4. Queen
    Queen says:

    If he doesn’t wait then he’s not for you …. If he waits and honestly feels as if he will go else where to gt it he should be honest enough to let you know it .. So you can make the decision about it all …. If you wanna wait til marriage n he don’t … There is someone out their that will love you more , respect ur wished totally n wait with nothing on the side…….. Queen

  5. SJM
    SJM says:

    When you have sex, you're not only exchanging fluids, but you are also exchanging spirits. This bond should only be shared with the one you love – your husband/wife. Making the decision to wait is indeed a wise and healthy one.

    P.S. I did not see the video, ( because I was more interested in the comments) but I could pretty much predict what the Ma'ats take would be on this one…a wise one I'm sure. Peace.

  6. Ashleigh L.A.
    Ashleigh L.A. says:

    I'm the same age as this young woman and I agree with your advice. I'm sexually active but I respect the wishes of anyone that abstains or is celibate. Anyone that truly cares about you will respect your choices. No one should try to influence your choice. It should be made consciously.

  7. Harriet
    Harriet says:

    MAAAAAAAAAAD respect for this video and the young lady asking the question! I was 21 when I started having sex, and 22 when I stopped…I waited 5 years and started again AFTER I got married. Although things in my marriage did not work out, I went right back to my lifestyle of celibacy after my separation from my husband. I agree with Aiyana and Ayize…respect and honor yourself, and maintain that standard. A man will have a choice to either get with it or get gone.

    To save yourself some consternation, it would also be adviseable to let your lifestyle be known at the beginning of a relationship, before you invest too much feeling and emotion into it.

  8. Nicole
    Nicole says:

    Great Vid, Great Advice:)

  9. mochazina
    mochazina says:

    I would follow the logic that if he can’t control himself and abstain before marriage he’s MORE likely to not be able to control himself after marriage and cheat.

  10. ILoveToScrub
    ILoveToScrub says:

    Very good advice.

    Also U want a man who ALSO sees that value that U c in yourself.

    U want a man who WANTS YOU AND ONLY U, a man who is 100% INVESTED IN U so he has nothing so no one else can even get into the picture.

    If he can't wait then can U really expect that after you are married when things get hard? he will not run out or cheat? Now I am not saying that if both people choose to have sex before marriage that it can't work but if he can't see your value and respect U then idk.

  11. NewMe Now2000
    NewMe Now2000 says:

    I've been waiting for a while and it's truly a fulfilling walk. I always found it odd that some people who make the choice? to stay abstinate let others who are bedding everything in sight determine whether or not it's of any value or is feasible. Seriously, how would they know? I have learned so much and have been actually preparing for marriage and thinking past the wedding, which not enough people do. Also saying a man can't wait is an insult to him, like he's some mindless animal.

    NewMeNow2000

  12. Its Me Arie
    Its Me Arie says:

    It is not impossible. I am 21 and my boyfriend of almost 4.5 years and I are still waiting together.?

  13. Intjurban
    Intjurban says:

    Honest and beautiful advice given in this vlog. Sex is perverted if it does not honor the? best of one's self.

  14. xineo theoneix
    xineo theoneix says:

    I'm male and I'm the same way, my slight worry in the back of my mind is a woman not even giving me the? time of day because of my vow of abstinence until marriage.

  15. Christianchick TV
    Christianchick TV says:

    i LOVE? the way your husband looks adorely at you Aiyana.

  16. musiclover77able
    musiclover77able says:

    Thank you for this video.?

  17. Sally Akerti
    Sally Akerti says:

    Thank you! Love your vid.

    Great? advice.

Comments are closed.