Black Man…. Own Your ISH!!

The title of this video really says it all. Black men are Kings. Black men are all dat. And guess what? Black men—we have to take responsibility for ourselves, our stuff, our families, our communities and our impact. #Bottomline #StopplayingStartpushing

Black men it’s imperative that we be accountable and take ownership of our ISH! Take the first step to healing and accountability by joining me at our upcoming online Relationship Round Table. This Round Table is FOR MEN. Hurry….Only 10 seats available. Join us this upcoming Wednesday Nov 8th from 8-10pm where I along with my wife Aiyana Ma’at will lead a group through a transformative group where the fellas will get a chance to share their relationship challenge……receive insight from us and the other brother’s in the group….and be inspiried to revolutionize how you show up for your wife and children. VISIT http://www.BlackLoveAndMarriage.com to get your seat TODAY!!!

It’s Not About Oral Sex…..Or Is It?

It’s Not About Oral Sex…..Or Is It?

I am in need of guidance. I am a 34 year old black male who has been dating a 24 year old mother of one. We spent our first few months talking, as I wanted to get to know her. I live in Houston and she in Sherman. So it does take some effort to see eachother, but it’s never an issue. I love her deeply and she knows this. I respect her and am committed to her and her daughter. We have wonderful communications. We always manage to work things through and we never hold grudges. I love the way I feel when i’m around her . She has expressed the same feelings towards me. All in all, we are good.

Here’s the rub. When we first started talking/dating, we would speak a little about sex, but not too much because I know what I can do in the bed and I didn’t want sex to become the foundation that we built our relationship on. But during that time, she would hint a few times that she can’t wait to do oral on me. Fast forward. I have not gotten it. Not even once. I make baths and massage this woman, I give her oral and whatever else she dersires in bed. I have asked her as politely as I can about it. Her previous response was “I will once I get comfortable.”

I have never been a cheater, but most of my life I have been cheated on. So this bothers me, I am a clean person. I even shave. So last night I ask her to tell me straight up if she is pulling my chain because my desires matter too. I give her oral with pleasure. And for her to have once bragged on it , yet has not done it to me yet, really hurts. I’ve asked all the important questions. Her response was “I think we should wait until we are married so it can be something special.”

That pissed me off in ways unknown. I don’t defer her wants and needs. Yet I have to wait, even longer? If i am the best manshe has ever had, as she claims, then why must I wait when I’m sure whe was slobbing other guys genitals in her past relationships? It make me feel unappreciated, unacknowledged, unattractive, unimportant, and insecure. It’s not fair. I’ve been a good man. Now the negro in me that has laid dormant in me since birth, is very tempted to find a woman on the side just to please me in that area. I spend my money, We talk for hours everyday. Yet I can’t get this one simple thing I ask for?

The only thing that is preventing me from doing it is the fact that i love her. But this cannot continue or she will lose me. I believe In “we instead of I”. I live that way in our relationship. I refer to her daughter as our child. I also belive in “you play how you practice”. This is truly hurting me on a deep level. If you guys have the time. Please help me figure out what to do.

For INDIVIDUAL & COUPLES COUNSELING with Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at CLICK HERE.

We Dare You To Compromise In Your Relationship

Relationships are all about give and take. It’s those folks who are soooo committed to standing their ground that end up standing alone. Learn to compromise yall….it’s critical to your relationships longevity.

Pushing Through Chaos To Experience Connection

Pssst. We’ve got a secret for you. You’ve got to prioritize your relationship. There will always be stress of some sort that you’re dealing with (even the good kind). Always! You can’t wait for things to quiet down. You can’t wait until you handle this bill or that situation. You can’t wait! You’ve got to be intentional about connecting even when you’re confronted with challenges. Connection is the lifeline of your relationship and will sustain you and your sweetie during the toughest of times. But, guess what you don’t get out what you don’t put in. So, CONNECT! Like your life….or YOUR RELATIONSHIP depends on it.  😉 Stop Playing Start Pushing.

Is It Ok For A Wife To Have A Hickey?

Sometimes couples in the heat of the moment get real passionate and leave evidence of their sexual rendezvous. Do you think that it’s ok for married couples to leave a passion mark…..a hickey? Is it all good or is it…. inappropriate? Let us know your thoughts…

Self Esteem 101. STOP Comparing Yourself!

This is for my sistas! From the time we are little we begin the self demeaning act of comparing ourselves to others. It can become a habit and really suck the life out of you and where you’re trying to go. So, just stop! Love, know and accept yourself and the sky is the limit!

Is Your Relationship Environment Toxic?

“When a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment it is in–not the flower.” There’s a lot us married folks that can learn from that statement. We need to stop focusing on and trying to fix our spouses and pay attention to how we contribute to a loving and positive (or nasty and toxic) environment. You have more power than you realize. Stop Playing. Start Pushing.


Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at, licensed clinical therapists and high school sweethearts, have been together for 22 years and married for 14. Together, they are the founders of B Intentional LLC, a personal development & relationship education company. Known for their signature down to earth and “keep it real” style. Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at have been featured on Dr. Drew’s Life Changers T.V. Show, Michael Baisden Show, Roland Martin’s Washington Watch, The Matt Mcgill Show, The Oprah Winfrey Network, and many more. While they are grateful for an abundance of opportunities to work with people all over the country committed to transcending self limiting barriers and elevating themselves and their relationships to a higher level, their most valued and important accomplishments to date are their 5 beautiful children who keep them busy, focused, centered, and laughing!

My Abandonment Issues Are Holding Back My Love Life

Your relationship with your parents has a permanent presence in your present relationship whether you like it or not. This fan wrote in with questions about how he can overcome the abandonment issues he has with his mom and commit to his lady. Awareness and acknowledgement is the first step. We all have some kind of mommy or daddy issues. Being in a committed relationship is the perfect place to work to heal some of that….if it’s the right relationship. Listen in…

 

Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at, licensed clinical therapists and high school sweethearts, have been together for 22 years and married for 14. Together, they are the founders of B Intentional LLC, a personal development & relationship education company. Known for their signature down to earth and “keep it real” style. Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at have been featured on Dr. Drew’s Life Changers T.V. Show, Michael Baisden Show, Roland Martin’s Washington Watch, The Matt Mcgill Show, The Oprah Winfrey Network, and many more. While they are grateful for an abundance of opportunities to work with people all over the country committed to transcending self limiting barriers and elevating themselves and their relationships to a higher level, their most valued and important accomplishments to date are their 5 beautiful children who keep them busy, focused, centered, and laughing!

My Husband Wants To Snuggle…But I Don’t Do All That

What do you do when cuddling isn’t a part of your emotional make up? How do you meet the need of someone who really wants physical affection when you’re not an affectionate person? This is a question we received from a viewer. Listen in to hear our advice.

Family Meals Create Strong Children

By Ayize Ma’at

Recently I spoke for Men’s Day about the role and responsibilities men have to their wife and children. My children were in attendance and I wanted to see if they retained the lesson and grasped the significance of the principles that I spoke on…the principles of Ma’at. Peek into a conversation at our dinner table about it…

Remember, taking the time to eat together will create the greatest opportunities for connecting in, teaching and listening to your children. Strong children are created on purpose.  Stop Playing. Start pushing.

 

Ayize Ma’at is the Co-founder of Blackloveandmarriage.com along with his wife Aiyana. Husband. Father. Brother. Son. Uncle. Philosopher. Entrepreneur. Therapist. Teacher. Speaker. Entrepreneur. Thinker. Real. Laid Back…..These are all words that have been used to describe Ayize. Ayize is a certified Functional Family Therapist & Licensed Graduate Social Worker. He is also a certified Marriage & Relationship Educator specializing in couples & family work. When Ayize is not developing creative interventions to more effectively help others he can be found kicking back watching football, catching up on the latest Youtube videos and chilling with his Queen–Aiyana and their 5 beautiful & brilliant children.