One Lie Too Many. How Much Is Too Much?
VIDEO: Do you keep finding yourself in relationships with habitual liars, abusers,or (you fill in the blank)? Do you find yourself attracted to people and situations that bring misery to your life? When we continue to find ourselves in the same situation again and again—each time with slightly different characters—we must stop and ask the oh so necessary question: What is the same and who is the same?
So often we find ourselves saying things like: “Why do men always____?” or People always treat me like____!” In reality, the people are changing from situation to situation but the behaviors and experiences we are having are the same and we are the common denominator in each situation!
In this show we help a viewer work through some messy stuff in her relationship by advising her to take a deep look at herself to see why she keeps attracting the same old junk.
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I'm sorry that this sister is in this situation. Much grace to you, Sweetie, 'cause you're gonna go through some difficult times with this brother. It's a generational thing that needed to be fixed prior to taking a mate.
For those who are entertaining these situations prior to marriage……if this is what you want, keep pursuing it. If it's not, get busy doing the work of having what you want to have. Look at your family and the issues they have. Take some notes, and google some of the things you see. Get some books on the issues and read, read, read. Then you must do the work of digging out from under the mess your family put you under (make sure you get some "how to" books). While you're doing all of this, THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DATE!
When you see happy married couples and wonder how they got that way………..this is how. (Either that, or they grew up in a healthy family). They did the work of digging out from under the mess, and came out on the other side. They learned to keep the mess out of the marriage and the house and don't allow it to come anywhere them or their children.
And they lived happily ever after in the hood as an example to others of how to do what they did and have marital and family success.
Omg!!! Every time I watch a video from you guys I can feel the love you have for one another just jumping at me! I can feel the love between ya'll is real! It's strong! It's positive! It's inspirational! I pray that one day I can have that same type of connection with my spouse! May God continue to bless you both & keep sharing the knowledge with us!
he may be on drugs
Woah! I can't believe what I just heard. I know that it's real, but this seems like it certainly could have been avoided :(. I can't believe this dude. After just hearing the beginning of the problem, I was thinking exactly what the Ma'ats said later. They COULD NOT have gone to premarital counseling. I'm not a counselor, but I still could have told them, to wait a few more years and straighten things out. These days good counselors have you do a credit check, take sexual transmitted disease tests, do family trees, a bunch of stuff so that you aren't caught off guard. Marriage is a huge decision, and you need to know who you plan on spending the rest of your life wife. My heart goes out to you sister and I hope that dude gets his act together some day. That is completely unacceptable. Especially with kids involved. I don't even know what else to say. God please help this couple, because they really need you. God bless!
Just my personal opinion based on personal experience, but this guy shows way too many signs of an abuser. The lies, the put downs, the "I'm Sorry's", the threats to leave you broke and homeless…that's abuse (economic & emotional). He knows your history and that's exactly what an abuser plays on. He was showing his true self before you got married, it's just a matter of paying attention to the signs. It's not what someone says, it's what they do, it's their actions. I agree with the Ma'ats…if you were just dating, I would say RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But since you're married, good Lord…lots of prayer, and lots of counseling, for both of ya'll, because we already know that dude has issues, but you have some "stuff" that needs to be addressed too. Please be strong…
No disrespect…but he sounds like a loser! It's never to late to start over. It sounds like his issues are to large to overcome. I agree with the Ma'at's you both need counseling. I'll be praying for you.