Women Like “Mr. BIG”…But That’s Not All They Want In Bed

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By Bellaisa Filippis

Women like “Mr. Big” and what it has to offer them but there are many other parts of your body that women like, and want, as well.

You see men tend to think “Mr. Big”, and it’s size, is what matters most to a woman in bed and that the actual act of sex and how they use that “Mr. Big” is what every woman is waiting to get to ultimately. But this is not the case.

There are a lot of other things that women think about in bed besides “Mr. Big” and these are the things that a woman is craving and wants to be totally satisfied in bed.

They want to feel your hands caressing them – and not just on their breasts. Your touch is a huge turn on for woman. Why do you think a lot of woman talk about strong hands being a quality they look for in men? They are craving your touch. The lighter the touch the more electric it feels and the harder the touch the more passionate it feels.

They want to feel your lips kissing them all over their body – and not just on their breasts. Kissing equates to appreciating and loving in a woman’s mind and it’s another huge turn on. When you kiss their neck or shoulder or stomach they equate it with you pay attention to, and desiring, those body parts along with their whole body.

Of course kissing on the lips should always be done as for some woman it can be more passionate then the actual act of sex.

They also want to feel your tongue – and not just on their breasts. The power of a lick on the neck, arm, leg, and any other body parts that do not normally get licked is out of this world. It actually gives those butterfly feelings that you get when you first start dating someone and getting intimate.

Licking is often over looked but it is an essential add on to turn a woman on and increase her desire and passion.

So you see while “Mr. Big” is definitely looked forward to in one way or the other there are a lot of other things that women look forward to in bed as well, and if you are skipping these techniques and heading straight to the intercourse then you are missing out on a lot of things that a woman actually wants along the way.

Ladies…What Does Your Kiss Print Say About You?.. Take The Test.

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By Koko Castle

It doesn’t matter what shape your lips come in. When it comes to sending a message, it’s all about the personality you express with that kiss. So take a look at the following kisses and see what romantic  message you send when you pucker up.

kiss personality

I’m Definitely a Diva.

You recognize this kiss by its pout and full lower lip. This is the kiss that says you know how to attract people and command their attention. You do well in the spotlight, and know how to flatter others so they like putting you there. Using this kiss will say I love laughter and fun. But it can also say I like to be in control, and don’t like anything getting in my way.

I’m Vocal about How I Feel.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it’s an open, balanced and well-defined kiss. This is the kiss that says you are a leader with strong convictions, a zest of life and a strong sense of who you are. Using this kiss will say I’m outgoing and fun loving and sure of myself but be prepared, this kiss may also say you are attracted to someone who is adventurous and challenging.

I’m Mysterious.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it is full but slightly compressed with a slightly stronger upper lip. This is the kiss that says you have a deeply passionate nature, but you are also intensely private. You are slow to show your emotions, and notice details most people overlook. Using this kiss says you are single-minded and decisive, but hints that you can be secretive and sometimes a bit prickly.

I’m Inspired and Inspiring.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it is well balanced but slightly opened, as though you are expecting something exciting to happen. This is the kiss that says you love to inspire others to reach for their dreams. You don’t let obstacles stop you; you find a way around them. Yet you remain friendly and outgoing. Using this kiss says you enjoy style, but beware this kiss also says you can be fiery and a little wild.

I’m a little Unconventional.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it’s well balanced, with a triangular-shaped lower lip. This is the kiss that says you have a quick mind, a engaging outlook on life and charm as well as style. You love art whether it’s found on a museum wall or in nature. Using this kiss will say I’m a champion for all things true, but it can also say expect me to speak my mind if I feel an injustice has occurred.

I’m Passionate.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it’s a very open kiss with a slightly stronger lower lip. This is the kiss that says you are an emotional person and lead with your heart. You enthusiastically embrace new ideas and eagerly take on new projects. You are often the motivating force in both relationships and business. But be careful, this kiss may also say you are impulsive and tend to over-commit yourself.

I’m Oh So Charming.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it is well balanced but slightly pursed. This is the kiss that says I thrive on creative conversation and making those around me feel happy. You are playful and fun, and attract success. Using this kiss will say I’m lucky to have you, and I love giving and receiving love. But this kiss projects fair warning that you expect to be appreciated.

I’m a Creative Thinker.

You recognize this kiss by the fact that it is slightly turned down at the corners. This is the kiss that says you are sensitive to others’ feelings. Your sense of humor is legendary, and you know how to enjoy life without leaving any collateral damage behind. Using this kiss will say you are a creative thinker, but it may also say that you tend to daydream and can be unpredictable.

Now you know what message you’ll be sending.

BLAM FAM what do you think?  Is this Kiss Print telling the truth about you?

Koko Castle knows something about kisses. She creates custom Kiss Prints at Koko’s Art in Portland, Oregon. My Big Kiss gives anyone the opportunity to send their unique romantic message.

6 Sizzling Ways To Bring The Sexy Back Into Your Marriage (…And Your Bedroom)

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By Ellie Johnston

The first year of marriage is like an amazing dream, the sex is usually good, the woman or man you have chosen is willing to do almost anything for you and you for them and you feel like butterflies are living in your body. Your body feels light and your head feels right. The constant fly past of imaginary lovebirds circling your head makes you feel as if all is right with the world. Your heart is fit to burst. The love is strong.

However, like everything in this world of ours if you use something too much it can break, become dysfunctional or simply fade away in to non-existence. Love can have this fading effect as well as your sexual relations with your partner. The big trick in this game is to keep both the sex and the love equal and continually try to keep your love life hot, hot, and HOT!

In a sexless loveless marriage something will eventually suffer. So, for this reason, you seriously need to concentrate on having a healthy sex life and love life.

So, just how do you bring the sexy back into your bedroom?

There are lots of ways you can do this. Here are a few…

1) Sexy Lingerie for her and sexy underwear for him

There are many styles of lingerie to suit many peoples taste including babydoll, corsets, pvc leather lingerie, chemises, bras and panties as well as sexy club wear style lingerie, stockings, etc. My suggestion is to try them all out at least once and find something you are comfortable and then go with that.

2) Explore each others sexual fantasies

Be vulnerable with one another. Share your secret desires. She may want to role play and dress up as a sexy cheerleader or a hot teacher. He may want to dress up as a doctor and inspect you with the tools of his trade.

3) Maybe you both want to explore sex toys

There is nothing wrong with a sex toy or two if you want to explore your sexuality with your partner. There are soooo many options that I would say it is impossible to not find something that tickles your fancy. Go to a sex toy shop or browse online together. Plan a “hot sex” night and bring out toys that you each bought to surprise each other. This can be so fun and will give you both something to look forward to and wonder about.

4) Play food fights and wrestling

Some men and some women love to be covered in food, jams, honey, cake cream, chocolate, raspberry and other sweet and delicious body condiments. The wrestling can be performed after you are covered in sweet gooey goodness. You trying to lick his off and him trying to lick yours off. You can have rules, no licking any erogenous zone before 5 – 10 minutes of sugar wrestling is done. Maybe even set a small alarm clock so there is a round one, round two and so on. The best of three rounds then it is a free for all. This food wrestling or food play is ok and can be fun to explore but as with many things revolving around love and sex, you have to be careful where your kids are (if you have kids) and make sure your Mothers are not on their way over to you. The last thing you need is to be covered from head to toe in cake mixture only to hear the doorbell ring and have the embarrassment of trying to explain why you are “playing” with your food.

5) Role Play

You can role-play and act like a stranger to husband or wife, and arrange to meet in a place you both do not know and dress up as a business man or woman and pretend not to know each other. Really get into it. The build up through the night will make for one wild sexy night. Maybe even be the naughty maid at home and your other half could be a butler and you steal away some sexual satisfaction together while cleaning “at work”. Or maybe if you are a woman you could be the lady of the house and the plumber has arrived to check your pipes but instead he starts checking your pipes. 😉

6) Naked resorts

You may think this is similar to swinging but it is not at all. Many people the world over like to try exhibitionism. They just show off their bodies, they probably get some excitement out of it but usually they only want to show their bodies and they do not necessarily want to have sex with anybody. They are quite different from swingers. Different strokes for different folks.  And you never know just showing off your body to your partner and to other individuals and getting used to your naked body could also be a marriage (and self image)  builder.

I hope you have taken notes! Now, get started!

Ellie Johnston is a sexy lingerie specialist. She helps promote a website that has many different types of sexy lingerie and sexy accessories called lingerie2order.com

Yes…Women Masturbate Too

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By Dr. John Anne

Female masturbation could easily qualify as one of the most controversial sex-health related topics in the world in any age. In most cultures, a woman masturbating is something that is unheard of. If it were ever found out that a woman pleasures herself in such a manner, then she would have to bear the brunt of ostracism in the very society she lives in. But the trends are changing slowly. In some cultures, the fact that women do masturbate to relieve their sexual tensions is coming out into the open. Women are increasingly talking about their little solo stints with as much frankness as men talk about their jack-off sessions.

Masturbation is the act of stimulating one’s own genitals by hand or by any other agency. The stimulation is generally done to the point of a climax, which may be quite similar to the orgasmic pleasure obtained in sexual intercourse. Both men and women masturbate; and as already mentioned above, men masturbate with more openness than women. But women also masturbate, and this article weighs the pros and cons of female masturbation.

Women generally masturbate by arousing their external genitals with their fingers. They would stimulate the vulva and the labia, with special pressure on the clitoris. Some women like to enhance the experience by introducing penis-shaped objects like cucumbers and bananas into their vaginas, and rubbing them in such a way that they would stimulate the clitoris. Women could use KY Jelly or Vaseline in order to make the contact smoother and better in feel. There are also several sexual toys that can be used, such as dildos, which come replete with vibrators operated by batteries. These vibrating dildos are considered to be the extreme when it comes to female masturbation.

It can be understood, therefore, that female masturbation is much different from male masturbation. For men, the only way of masturbating is by exerting different kinds of pressures on the penis (or anal stimulation), but for women, there are several areas along the genital tract that can be stimulated. Though the clitoris is the focal point, there are several other erogenous zones, including the famous G-spot within the vagina.

Also men need physical touch in order to masturbate. This is not the case in women. Women can masturbate even by mere thought, without even touching their genitals once. Women are known to masturbate without touching their genitals while reading erotic material, listening to soulful music or even by just looking at a painting or a piece of art. This enables women to masturbate even in public without being caught. In women, masturbation could become an entirely mental process, while in men the physical aspect of masturbation is much too important.

Apart from the immense pleasure it provides, female masturbation has several uses also. Today, since masturbation in women has come out in the women, some gynecologists are in fact prescribing masturbation to some women. It is interesting to see what the uses of masturbation are for women:

–  Firstly, masturbation helps to relieve sexual frustrations. Nowadays with almost all women having their careers and being forced to live solitary lives, the sexual seclusion has become a part of life. Masturbation can take part of a bit of that seclusion.

–  Women who have diseases like diabetes can find penetrative sex too discomforting. For such women, masturbation is prescribed to relieve sexual frustrations.

– Many women are deciding to remain single nowadays. There is also the scare of a lot of sexual diseases. Thus, women can look upon masturbation as an option.

–  Most women complain that their men lack the knowledge to give them satisfaction. Such women could masturbate themselves in front of their male partners to show them how to go about the foreplay and actual intercourse. In fact, the sight of a woman masturbating in front of him is a great way to increase his libido.

–  Women who are pregnant do not indulge in active sexual intercourse as there are a lot of risks involved. However, pregnancy is known to increase the libido in women. Such couples could mutually masturbate each other to relieve some of the stress.

However, there are also some risks involved with masturbation in women that are not existent in men. Women who masturbate actively must take care of the following:

–  Women must not insert their fingers in the vagina with untrimmed nails. The nails could damage the inner delicate lining of the vagina. Before masturbating, the woman must neatly file and trim her nails.

– It is dangerous to insert any fruits or vegetables into the vagina that are small in size. There is a risk of them getting stuck in the vaginal tract or even entering the uterus.

–  Any tools with sharp edges must not be entered in the vagina.

–  A woman who masturbates a lot could get so much hooked with it that she might find intercourse boring.

For women, masturbation could be a way to relieve their sexual stresses; but it is also a method of realizing their freedom. If done correctly and within limit, it could make the woman lead a better, stress-free life.

Dr. John Anne:  Read more about Female masturbation and other Secret Sexual Issues at http://www.mysecrethealth.com

Foreplay Please!!!! 8 Erogenous Zones Your Woman Wants You To Know

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By Linda Scheifer

Which are the best erogenous zones on a woman that drives her passionately wild? We all think of the usual: the clitoris and the breasts but, in actuality, there are many more.  Some will be obvious to you while others will be more subtle. Master them and your woman will worship you.  Just kidding.  Women enjoy a lot of foreplay before sex so focusing on foreplay will come to your advantage and will lead you as well to come to a more satisfying sex life. When you’re exploring these 8 zones remember to be gentle and go slow.  It’s very attractive to women when you’re thoughtful and move with intention.  Don’t forget how to stimulate and caress the two most common….and don’t ignore these 8 others.

1. Ears
The ears have a tremendous amount of nerve endings and a good way to engage in foreplay. You can lick, nibble and kiss the ears both inside and outside of the ears so that she is maximally stimulated. When you do this, whisper something sweet into her ears or blow softly into the ears.
2. The Lips
Many women find this is their top erogenous zone and most women are found to complain that the man doesn’t kiss her enough. They just love to be kissed so you can practice this and see the difference. Kissing is important and a part of foreplay that you just can’t ignore. Make the kiss really passionate and vary the intensity of your kisses with her. Use both your mouth and your tongue for a maximal effect.
3. Neck
Many women say that one of the top erogenous zones is their neck. You can, in the act of foreplay, kiss her neck and lick it. Suck on her neck to make her extremely aroused. Stroke her neck gently with one or both hands. Explore the different parts of her neck and note that the area near the ears is extremely sensitive. Go back to this hot area over and over again in order to drive her wild.
Think about all the passion and variety you can put into this area. Allow her to enjoy a varying intensity of nibbling, licking, caressing and kissing. Don’t go too far, however, or they will complain of a bruising on their neck.
4. The Back
Many guys don’t realize how underrated the back is when it comes to foreplay. The small of the back is especially sensitive as it contains a great deal of sensitive nerve endings. Begin the process by massaging her back with oils and then begin kissing the back, brushing your lips across it. The massage helps her unwind and sets the both of you up to have the best night of passion you’ve ever had. Don’t forget to run your tongue along the back as well as women particularly like this.
5. Legs
The two top places are the backs of the knees and the inner thighs. Filled with nerve endings, they are great sites for foreplay. Gently lick or kiss this area during foreplay and try not to be too rough as these are particularly sensitive body areas.
6. Buttocks
Women often feel nervous around their buttocks and feel better when men appreciate them. Squeeze her buttocks and fondle them as much as you can. Take the time to lick and kiss this area so that the woman knows you appreciate this part of her anatomy.
7. Feet
Feet are extraordinarily sensitive and can be part of foreplay games for couples. They are loaded with nerve endings and you can include the feet as part of foreplay games by sucking her toes, kissing her feet and licking her toes. Give her feet a brief massage to let her know you care. Feet have a tendency to be ticklish so you should be gentle with them and be aware when they are being tickled too much.
8. Hands and arms
Men don’t often think of these as erogenous zones but they are extremely sensitive. Women like their wrists licked, kissed and nibbled by the man and adore having their fingers sucked by him. The areas around the elbow are also very sensitive and should be focused on in foreplay.

 These are eight areas you definitely want to focus on in foreplay. Target these areas with love and passion and show variety in what you do.  Have fun exploring!

No Sex In Your Marriage? Husbands Slow Down & Pay Attention

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By Howard Guy

When you have no intimacy in marriage of the physical kind your relationship with your wife is on a slippery slope because while some people think they can divorce the notion of love from sex this is not what a marriage is about and sexless marriages have been proven to fail more times than they do not and even if they survive if the issue is not fixed both partners can end up frustrated, angry and bitter.

For husbands trying to discover why their wife has become so distant and uninterested in sex there is one bit of advice that you must heed and that is to slow down, do not force the issue and do not become angry, overbearing or depressed because trying to fix the problem like it is a nail and you are a hammer is not going to work when women’s emotions are so involved.

A woman’s emotional problems is at the heart of these issues you so it is not about physical appearance if you have put on a few pounds, it is not because their body has suddenly changed. Instead the vast amount of sexless marriages (18% of all marriages say some figures) are caused by one or more partners having deeper issues they cannot communicate properly, do not want to communicate or simply do not understand themselves. This can be very stressful to some women and one reaction is becoming sexually disinterested while these issues continue to dominate their mind and body.

So if you want an end to no sex in marriage you need to stop, listen and try to understand the reasons behind the excuses without making matters worse. This can be very difficult and rekindling the desires you used to have takes time and effort but when aroused again the benefits to your relationship emotionally and physically will last the test of time.

The Sweet Science Of Kissing

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17 years ago I first kissed my wife.  When our lips touched…something magical happened.  That moment left an indellible imprint on my spirt and is comfortably nestled in my heart and mind. Wendy Stragar’s ( YourTango.com) take on the science behind the “magic” that happens when two lips touch is much needed.  When you’re done reading it make a mental note that it’s important to give and get a kiss when you get home tonight.

“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.”- Ingrid Bergman

I love to kiss. When I think back to living in France in my 20s, the most memorable part of my time there was all the kissing that occurred. I got to kiss everyone: strangers, friends and of course, lovers. Participating in that social ritual that demanded that one come in close was what I missed most when I left. I had no idea that there was a science and study of kissing when I started this article and I must admit that I feel a bit miffed that we can consecrate a science to kissing, philematology, and people still balk at the idea of loveology. Still, the more I learn about kissing, the more legitimate the science becomes. Kissing is the building block of intimacy. Done with intention and passion, the kiss is the most profound of all our communication devices and the pathway to sustaining loving relationships.

Think back to some of the hottest sex you ever had and you might remember that you were fully clothed and that the sex happened entirely between the lips – and what lips we have for the job. It turns out when you study philematology that human lips have the slimmest layer of skin on the body and are among the most densely populated with sensory neurons of any bodily region, more so than fingertips or even genitalia. That isn’t the only place where the human body is wired to kiss. Half of our cranial neurons influence the kiss by releasing a cascade of neural messages and chemicals, which create the intense euphoric sensations and the vital signals about the sexual/mating potential.

And, no – it’s not just in your mind: everyone has a racing heart and finds him or herself breathless and maybe even a bit sweaty. It turns out that kissing is its own kind of fitness workout that both burns calories and requires significant muscular coordination. In fact, a total of 34 facial muscles and 112 postural muscles are used during a kiss. How can you not be completely present when you are deep in a kiss? It’s no wonder that ancient lovers believed that a kiss would literally unite their souls because the spirit was said to be carried in one’s breath. Two people fully entwined in each other’s kiss are united in connecting to the exclusion of all else.

Some philematologists would argue that kissing serves as a vital function in survival of the species. Try to imagine kissing someone who smells offensively to you. How our unique scent blends with a potential mate tells us volumes both consciously and subconsciously about our genetic compatibility or the lack of it. This is why the first kiss can sometimes be the kiss of death for a new relationship. If the scent attraction is off, the relationship is generally doomed. Our attraction through our nose may be our most primitive, but it is also the most important in finding out who are worthy partners.

The origin of the kiss remains a mystery, but the nourishment and oral satisfaction that kissing provides may well be linked to the long history of prehistoric mothers who, through the act of ‘mouth feeding,’ transferred pre-masticated food to their infants. No surprise then that in several languages the word for kissing is synonymous with pre-mastication and the word “sweet” is the epithet most commonly applied to kisses. Freud believed that our desire to kiss is a subconscious drive back to the suckling experience at the mother’s breast. Certainly the first and most loving kiss most of us remember was in the hands of the woman we called mom.

It is no surprise that kissing is good for you. Studies show that increasing the frequency and, dare I say the intensity of kissing in your relationship, is found to lower your stress levels and increase your satisfaction with both your relationship and your life. Another study showed that a little kiss before you leave home may actually save your life. Men who kissed their wives before leaving for work were in fewer car accidents and were in a higher income bracket than men who avoided this domestic ritual. Someone once said that kisses are like tears, the only real ones are the ones you can’t hold back; so in the pursuit of a better and more perfect study of philemagtology – don’t.

CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL ARTICLE

10 Things You Can Do To Satisfy Your Man Sexually

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By Greg Michael

You just can’t lay down in bed spread your legs and expect him to jump for joy. Great lovemaking does not automatically happen, you must do these ten things if you want your man to be fully satisfied in bed:

1. Open yourself both physically and mentally so that both of you can better achieve an orgasm. Some women think that it is just good enough to simply be naked in bed and great sex will happen. Not so. You have to be open physically and mentally by giving into the physical pleasure you feel, and making sure your mind is engaged in the pleasure as well.

2. When you are giving your man oral sex do not make it seem like you are doing him a favor. Give him a oral sex the way you would want him to do the same to you. Your attention to detail and your enthusiasm will come through in the act. If he feels you genuinely want to pleasure him, he will respond to you with the biggest orgasm.

3. Find out what his fantasy is and let him indulge in it — as long as it is something that you are comfortable with, and will not end up ruining your relationship.

4. Incorporate sex toys into your lovemaking. Find out what he enjoys and let him have it. Sometimes it may end up being something that you will derive a lot of pleasure from.

5. Put on your sexiest lingerie and do a strip tease for him. Make sure you have lit up some scented candles, and put on some soft music. As you dance for him, touch him in his sweet spots and be sure to tease him a little. Do not let him touch you even if he wants to, until you are completely nude.

6. Ask him if he would like to watch you masturbate and then give him a show that he must watch through to the end as if he were looking at you through a peep show window. The tension and excitement will most likely drive both of you into a frenzy that only a good orgasm will quench.

7. Surprise him by initiating sex. Most of the time men initiate sex even to the point that they feel that it has turned into one of their chores. It is a turn on when you initiate sex.

8. Turn him on by letting him know what you enjoy in bed. If you get the most pleasure when he penetrates you from the back, vocalize it during lovemaking. Men feel good about making love to you when you let them know that they are hitting your sweet spot.

9. Offer yourself to him blindfolded. Often this willingness to surrender and to trust him completely can heighten his sexual experience.

10. Do not be afraid to explore each other’ s bodies before, during, and after sex. As you well know, men are visual beings and are turned on when you let them see all of you — with the lights on.

To see more of Greg Michael’s work, visit SmartWoman’sGuide.com.

 

Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at are the owners of this site and are relationship experts and internet marketers who have been featured on the Oprah Winfrey Network, Dr. Drew’s Lifechangers, TV One, and other media outlets.

We help people build healthy relationships and GET FREE FROM THE RAT RACE by helping you to build a home based businesses online.

To learn how you can work with us, have a business around whatever your passion is, and EARN MONEY ONLINE…. CLICK HERE:http://www.prosperityteam.co/freevideoreveals/?id=amaat&tag=

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The Therapeutic Value Of A Hug

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By Gian Fiero

Have you hugged your child today? It was a popular slogan that was coined in 1969. I think it’s time to modify the phrase to: Have you hugged your loved one today?

Most couples report the perfunctory kiss upon their greeting or departure as their most consistent form of affection outside of sex. It’s not enough. We should never mistake or substitute sex for affection. Affection expressed through hugging is therapeutic and fulfills our basic, human need for touching or being touched. It also relaxes us and lowers our blood pressure. In essence, affectionate touching can improve and prolong our lives.

Couples should indeed put forth greater effort to be affectionate with each other. Those who do tend to report greater harmony, a closer bond, and fewer conflicts in their relationships.

In his book Touching: The Human Significance of Skin, Dr. Ashley Montagu examines the importance of touch on all aspects of human development. Through an analysis of the study of mammal, monkey, ape and human behaviors, he concludes that just as breathing is a basic physical need for these species, touch is a basic behavioral need and when this need remains unsatisfied, abnormal behavior is a likely outcome. He writes:

“Both the hugger and the person being hugged benefit because they have the immediate positive outcome of feeling good. Hugs are heartwarming and can have the effect of leaving one energized and rejuvenated. A caregiver’s hug accurately expresses to a child feelings of love, acceptance, comfort and a desire for closeness.”

He continues.

“Hugging is health-enhancing because it reduces tension and stress, aids the immune system, helps with sleep, assists in building self-esteem and best of all has no negative side effects. When we open our hearts and arms to others, we inspire them to do likewise.”

Former late night talk show host Arsenio Hall made the “man hug” acceptable. He greeted his guests – both female and male – with a warm embrace. It set the tone for the intimate conversations which followed. His guests seemed to be oblivious to the cameras and the studio audience as they revealed information about themselves to Arsenio that they probably would not reveal to another talk show host. Ditto for Oprah Winfrey. Her warm embrace is not only welcoming, but comforting to her guests.

There are many types of hugs that are given in different situations. The hugs that you see given at airports tend to be longer in duration. Hugs that are given to people that you have not seen in a while tend to be more enthusiastic. Hugs that are romantically inspired tend to be more intense and sometimes are given back-to-front (one person from behind who wraps their arms around the other), which carries sexual connotations. Then there’s the sideways hug which is essentially a one-armed embrace that shows friendliness and acceptance.

No matter what type of hug you give or receive, a hug is a hug and it carries emotional benefits. In fact, hugging is so therapeutic that there is a National Hugging Day (January 21) which was created in 1986 by Rev. Kevin Zaborney from Caro, Michigan. Zaborney created the day to promote “the emotional benefits of hugging.”

You now know that hugs are therapeutic pills that we can prescribe to each other. They supply our souls with the nutrients of affection that we all need for our mental health, and emotional well-being. Taking the time or making the effort to give more hugs is clearly a rewarding experience for both the person giving it, and the person receiving it.

Have your hugged your loved one today? If not, there’s no better time than the present.
Gian Fiero is an educator, speaker and consultant. He specializes in business development, career planning, and personal growth issues. He is affiliated with San Francisco State University as an adjunct professor, and the United States Small Business Administration (SBA) as a business advisor where he conducts monthly workshops in addition to lecturing throughout the country.

Sex Situations: What Do You Do When It Becomes Awkward?

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Anyone who has ever had sex has probably come across 1 or two or maybe even more of the scenarios listed below.  Instead of simmering in a pool of embarrassment read the below post from Madamenoire.com and get educated on how to deal with awkward sex situations. You may even have some solutions yourself that you want to offer to the Blam Fam.  Feel free to chime in…each one.. teach one.

By Toya Sharee

If only sex could be as seamless as it is in the movies.  In the movies bra clasps are unfastened effortlessly, the kids aren’t banging at the door and there’s no wet spot left afterwards that no one wants to lie in.  Unfortunately in the real world, sex has its fair share of awkward and mortifying moments that can be scary if you don’t see them coming.  Take a look at a few ways to avoid and overcome sex’s little malfunctions.

1. Queefing

You and your man are going at it hot and heavy when between your moans and murmurs you hear a familiar sound cut through the passion.  No you haven’t just cut the cheese, although it may sound that way. Passing gas and queefing only sound similar because they both involve air escaping from an enclosed space.  Queefing occurs when air is forced into the vagina as a result of little or no lubrication.  If you’re with a guy who makes a big deal over a little trapped air, he probably has a lot of growing up to do.  Otherwise, keep some extra lube handy.

2. Breakthrough Bleeding

Blood is usually never a good sign, especially during sex. Unfortunately, Aunt Flo may just decide to make an appearance in the middle of your sex session.  If your period has unexpectedly just started, there’s a good chance that your flow is light and maybe you’ll notice any unwanted spotting before he does.  Kindly excuse yourself and head to the bathroom just to investigate exactly what’s going on.  Usually simply being honest with your partner is all it takes.  Some guys will be a little grossed out, but most men understand that these things happen and a select few might even be happy to run the red light.

If you notice blood that’s not associated with a menstrual cycle, it could mean the rough sex you were just having was borderline brutal.  Ask your partner to be a bit more gentle with your fragile femininity.  Sex shouldn’t hurt.  Repeated pain or bleeding with sexual intercourse is not normal and could be symptoms of a sexually transmitted infection or other medical emergency so it’s important to see your doctor just to rule out any injury or infection.

3. Your head was in his lap, and soon your lunch was too.

It’s no secret that men love a good deep throat, and points to the ladies who push themselves to the limit in order to satisfy their men, but when your gag reflex goes wrong things can get messy.  Your gag reflex is triggered when the soft palate in your throat is touched.  It’s actually the mechanism that keeps you from choking and can be used to induce vomiting.  When some ladies get over-ambitious with their oral it can create a series of chain reactions that once started, cannot be stopped.

My advice: Aim right.  If you’re going to throw up, there’s usually very little you can do about it, but aim anywhere but his lap.  When the gag reflex is triggered the response can be pretty instantaneous.  Know your limits, and don’t push yourself beyond them in an effort to prove yourself. You don’t have to be a sword swallower to give good oral.  Your man might be a little pissed, but a little vomit never hurt anybody.  Actually, who am I kidding, there’s no recovering after that.  Clean up and make it a Netflix night because your mood is pretty much killed.

4. His penis comes out, the condom doesn’t.

There’s a reason why condoms are only about 98% effective.  Sometimes the most properly used condom can lose its way, but luckily there are back up plans that can help ease your fears. Rough sex, little lubrication and too much lubrication can all contribute to a rogue rubber. Before we worry about all the possible outcomes of that, let’s focus on finding the condom and removing it, since allowing it to live rent-free in your vagina can lead to infection.  Lie flat
on your back with your knees bent (imagine you are about to get a gyno exam) and have your partner help you locate the latex by inserting his fingers and attempting to pull it out.  The vagina is not an endless black hole.  It is a very elastic organ measuring from 3-4 inches when relaxed to 8-9 inches when aroused.  Nevertheless, if a condom does get stuck in there it’s only going to come out one way.  If this doesn’t work try squatting and using the same muscles you use to urinate to help push it out.  Get comfortable with your vagina and insert your own fingers for additional help.  If this doesn’t work, you may need to visit a doctor who has the tools necessary to locate and remove the condom.

If you are already using another method of contraception such as the pill or Depo-Provera, risk of pregnancy may not be a big concern.  If not, you can purchase emergency contraception (The “Day-After” pill) from a health center or pharmacy.  Emergency contraception is effective up to 120 hours after unprotected intercourse, but it is most effective when it is taken early.  Be sure to get tested for sexually transmitted infections as well.  The same advice goes for discovering a condom that has broken during intercourse as well.

5. The kids ask, “Mom, why were you yelling Dad’s name last night?  I thought he was in the room with you?”

As a sex educator, I believe that the earlier sex education starts, the healthier outlook a person has on human sexuality.  Understandably, this is never an easy conversation for most parents, but it does provide an opportunity to explain to children what a healthy sexual relationship is all about.  Depending on the ages of the children, this doesn’t have to be an intense conversation about contraception and pregnancy, but you could explain that when people are in love they express that love in a variety of ways.  In my opinion telling children that, “Mommy and Daddy were playing a game,” is misleading and confusing and only easier for you than it is for the child.  It can be tough to find a balance between answering questions honestly and preserving your children’s childhood, but your children will be better for it in the long run. Next time, wait until the kids are sleep or out the house, or yell into the pillow if you don’t want to be caught like a deer in headlights over next morning’s breakfast.

6. He’s ready, but his penis didn’t get the memo.

Many things can contribute to erectile dysfunction including alcohol intoxication, stress, certain medications, hormonal imbalances and a variety of physical and psychological conditions.  The last thing you want to do is add to his frustration by complaining or belittling him since this will only help aggravate the problem.  Keep in mind that it also may have very little to do with his attraction to you.  Sexual arousal is a complex combination of sexual stimuli, physical reaction and mental state.  If your partner is stressed or distracted because of work or other problems, this may affect his ability to perform.  There are others ways to satisfy each other besides penetration.  Simply talking about what may be on his mind, passionately kissing or cuddling while watching a movie might be way to get his mind of off whatever is distracting him and more on being intimate with you.  If his erectile dysfunction is a result of
a chronic medical condition, he may want to seek a medical professional for medication or therapy.

7. You wet the bed, but not on purpose.

Although the waters of female ejaculation still remain mostly uncharted, most medical professionals agree that is very real.  Female ejaculatory fluid is a clear liquid released from a gland in females similar to the prostate gland in males.  Most doctors agree that all women possess the ability to achieve ejaculation through stimulation of the G-spot.  Unfortunately, for most women the G-spot can be tricky to find (you may be able to find it by inserting the fingers inside the vagina and performing a “come here” motion behind the clitoris).  Once it’s found, stimulation can be uncomfortable for many women since the feeling of an approaching vaginal orgasm can be similar to the need to urinate.

If you accomplish female ejaculation successfully, keep in mind the amount of fluid may vary from woman to woman. If you are afraid that you’ll mistake urination for female ejaculation, avoid this concern by emptying your bladder prior to sex.  Otherwise keep a towel handy, and if at first you don’t succeed, try try again.

8. He came, left and got the t-shirt. You’re still waiting to board the plane.

In a perfect world, you and your partner would cross that finish line together and create fireworks simultaneously.  What usually happens though, is that the male partner often leaves his lady in the dust.  Biologically it’s easier for a man to achieve orgasm than a female.  We women are complicated creatures who achieve orgasms a little more strategically.  First things first, you might want the orgasm too much and are psyching yourself out of it in the process.  Pleasure is 50% body and 50% mind.  If you are looking at sexual satisfaction like the prize at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box, you’re missing all the great caramel coated popcorn and peanuts in between.  Focus on enjoying what’s happening instead of chanting, “C’mon with the cum on,” inside of your head.  Relax.

Also communicate and compromise with your partner.  Maybe allow him to perform oral sex on you first and bring you to orgasm, and then he gets to have his fun.  By having your orgasm first you are already lubricated making it easier for him to penetrate.  Also, since you’ve had your fun, you can focus on him getting his.  Keep in mind that men aren’t mind readers.  If you are allowing him to roam aimlessly on your body without giving him some pointers
about specifically what pleasures you, you are just as much to blame as he is.

Toya Sharee is a community health educator who has a passion for helping young women build their self-esteem and make well-informed choices about their sexual health.  She also advocates for women’s reproductive rights and blogs about everything from beauty to love and relationships. Follow her on Twitter @TheTrueTSharee.