It's Easier To Avoid Than To Resist…
VIDEO: This husband writes that he has a good wife yet he still deals with attraction to other women. Is this normal or does this brother have issues?? What do you think B Intentional family? Marinate on this question and let us know how you feel. QUESTION: Do you want to know if your mate is attracted to someone else? Is this helpful or harmful to share with each other?
@ D. Horne
thanks for the comment…if you find yourself thinking about someone outside of your spouse when, where, and how you shouldn’t be ….then the attraction is to much. Infidelity begins in the mind….so it’s best to confront it there first.
.-= Ayize´s last blog ..The Bottom Line Episode 8- “Are We There Yet …in our relationship” =-.
Well, Yes its very helpful because thats let you know what your man is attraction are and if you can't do anything to grab that attention than you need to movie on. I wonder when is the atraction to much and when should you worry if this is pass just okay.
Yes this also can make a mess of things but it depends on if you have good communcation first.
Yes,i know my partner is attractive to someone else,because he is a men,he is human,that o.k…i’m also attractive to someone else,only by eyessight,i’m gratful that my mate,still can identify beauty…when he cutting his eyes,or looking back at some one else ,it not a threat to me,cause he would say that a nice looking ladies,i reply,she is…i would really have my guard down if only my mate think,i’m attractive…I think that a good thing to keep the marriage exciting,and keep the line open for communication,to look back and have a good laugh…there no need of feeling that emotion of discomfort in your marriage,when you have that confident within yourself…I got this in control…Live and let live….
Great point Tawnya, but do you think there comes a point where it may need to be discussed?
.-= Aiyana´s last blog ..You Down With Public Displays Of Connection? =-.
My husband and I are discussing this question. My husband says he doesn’t want to know if I am attracted to someone else and he is neutral on whether it is harmful or helpful to a relationship. I am not sure if I want to know if my husband is attracted to someone or not, I see both positives and negatives to that information. I guess I am also neutral on whether its harmful or helpful, I think it all depends on your connection in the relationship. Some people deal well with total honesty, others would not like to know EVERY thought of their mate. So…. I guess its helpful with the couples that operate on a full disclosure/total honesty plane and harmful to those who dont do well knowing or acknowledging those kinds of feelings.
@Harriet
Once again we get back to that honesty piece. I applaud you and your husband for negotiating the “realness of relationships”. In working with couples…my wife and i experience a reoccurring theme of folks not wanting to be “found out” by their mate about feelings, attractions, desires, etc. etc. they may have toward another person. It’s that secrecy that fuels the fire….and i feel if honest dialogue was there it would be a lot easier to work through it together. While some folks may “walk it out”…my wife and I “talk it out” when it comes to this issue. It’s because of the closeness and realness of our connection that we too “affair proof” and “divorce proof” our relationship.
To answer your questions: if a man approaches me and tells me he’s attracted to me, I tell my husband. I keep him in the know about my relationships with other men for accountability purposes, and the same vice versa. I haven’t found a recurring theme of me being attracted to other men, though. Not that it hasn’t happened, but I don’t sit and ruminate on it, because I don’t want any kind of emotional bond to be established between me and another man.
I think it helps our relationship because we are totally honest with one another (yes, he has told me about other women as well), and thus we keep each other in check, and we effectively “affair proof” and “divorce proof” our relationship through that honesty.
.-= Harriet´s last blog ..Take Off The Mask! =-.