When I was 9, I met this girl at summer camp who 8 years later became my first love. We were together a little over 2 years and ever since then, she’s been my only love. At the beginning of this relationship, I came out to my mother and she was FURIOUS! After her, I dated women for a year then got back with the guy that I dumped for her. I’ve been dating guys mostly and have talked to two women.
By Lana Moline
There are a slew of commercials geared toward recapturing our youth. Sometimes the messages are overt but most often they are hidden in the imagery. I ask myself sometimes as I watch television who the target audience is as soon as the advertisements begin to roll. I suppose appealing to the desire in most people to remain active and alive equates sometimes to youth and that bothers me somewhat. Sure, I am the first person to support health and enjoyment in life which is the premise that most of these message fall under. However, the part of it that I have a problem with is that it somehow diminishes the honor of maturing and authenticity. I recognize that perhaps this approach is what sells but the message that it sends is one that repeatedly perpetuates juvenile behavior and a society of adult followers.
If we examine the world as a whole before internet and rapid changing technology, we may remember the honor in ritualistic family tradition. Girls couldn’t wait to turn 13 because maybe their parents would allow them to wear lip gloss. Boys couldn’t wait to turn 16 because then they would learn how to drive. Eighteen was a big deal because some teens were officially permitted to date and we all know what 21 is equated to in this country. However somewhere along the way 40 became the new 30 and 30 became the new 20 and so on. With this, the sense of duty to give, show and command a regal respect of wisdom is lost.
What this ultimately means in today’s society is that the line of progression is receding and the natural order of human growth and development is confused and that is unfortunate. Personally, there is nothing more beautiful than gaining insight into wisdom that I have yet to possess. I absolutely love to listen to elders who have gone through and conquered some of the things that I am facing as a woman, mother and wife. That simply makes my life easier because it gives me a key to the next phase of my journey. It is crucial to our existence that elders relish in the knowledge that they have gained and embrace what that means for others who look to them for guidance. When this happens as it should it confirms that God will direct my path the same way He directs others.
I Corinthians 13:11 – When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
Lana Moline is an integral part of the Blackloveandmarriage.com writing team, freelance writer and poet who lives in Ft. Worth with her three kids and husband Emile. Married 11 years, both media professionals have vowed to maintain integrity in all aspects of print and broadcast journalism.Visit her atLana Moline Speaks.
By Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at
Hey Fam! We are soooo excited and pleased to announce our new Relationship Renovation series that will be kicking off in January 2014!
As we sat and talked and evaluated how 2013 has been for us and what our goals for 2014 should be we kept coming back to the idea that we want to connect more, help more, and do more. Yes, that’s what we said—In 2014 we want to:
CONNECT MORE…..to you
HELP MORE……for you and
DO MORE……with you 🙂
We said “How can we be the most helpful and make the most impact?” We asked you on Facebook and Twitter and via our other social media platforms and YOU ANSWERED. You said you wanted to talk with us more about very important topics that so many of you are dealing with in your relationships. We received such great feedback and so many different topics that we decided to begin a Bi-Weekly Relationship Renovation Series.
- This is where we will discuss important, juicy, fun, and fundamental issues that are relevant to relationships of all kinds.
- This is where you will have the opportunity to participate! How? You can be “on” with us to share your story or ask a question as it relates to the theme of the Hangout. You can also share by asking questions when we have our “Ask Us Anything”Hangouts. And, of course you can chat with us during the Hangout as well.
- This is where you can come every 2 weeks to “go to school” and get insight and answers on all things relationships!
So, save the date for AYIZE & AIYANA’S FIRST RELATIONSHIP RENOVATION HANGOUT WHERE WE WILL TALK ABOUT HOW TO TURN UP THE LOVE & SEX IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP!
WHEN: THURSDAY, JAN 12, 2014
WHAT TIME: 9PM
For our first Hangout–We’re looking for singles or couples that would like to be featured on the Hangout. You should be willing to either share your story around sex and intimacy and/or ask a question. No questions are off limits. Any issue you have when it comes to sex and intimacy in your relationship(s)–past or present—BRING IT. We want to hear it!
Interested? Send an email with your issue or question to firstname.lastname@example.org or by clicking here: http://www.blackloveandmarriage.com/ask-the-maats/
***ATTENTION*** YOU MUST PUT THE WORDS GOOGLE HANGOUT SOME WHERE IN THE SUBJECT LINE OR IN THE BODY OF THE EMAIL PLEASE!!! REMEMBER, WE DO ADVICE VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE AND IF YOU DON’T LET US KNOW THAT YOU’RE RESPONDING TO THE GOOGLE HANGOUT CALL FOR PARTICIPANTS THEN YOUR EMAIL WILL GO TO THE BACK OF A VERY LONG WAITLIST OF FOLKS WAITING FOR US TO ANSWER THEIR VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE.
TO JOIN THE HANGOUT ENTER BELOW:
By Sharon Rodriguez
I believe in acknowledging my wrongs publicly. Who knows, maybe my mistake will help open someone else’s mind or heart.
Today I went to my God Fathers funeral. It was a beautiful Home going service in honor of a wonderful, loving, God like man who touched many lives. When my own father died 28 years ago I was so hurt and self absorbed that I lost contact with this…my God Family. Big mistake. He, my Godfather was hand picked at my birth to guide me and assist me after my Dad was no longer here. I was just to young, dumb to take advantage of the gift that I was given.
Today I realized that I just lost my other father and to make it even worse I had not been around to love him, hug him, experience him and even learn from him all these years. My children who have no living grandfather would have had one. I feel like I lost my Dad all over again. It hurts.
I will not make that mistake with my God Mother. She is still beautiful, graceful and gracious. She hugged me and said “don’t ever stay away from me again.” I promised that I would not. My name was even in the program. The family that I had not been in contact with for over 25 years still acknowledges me as one of their own.
Don’t wait until it’s to late. Love your family, whether by birth or the chosen ones and let them know it. You never know when the opportunity will be lost for this lifetime.
By Pierre E.
Fear causes us to make alot of unwise decisions, especially when it
comes to relationships… The fear of feeling left out.. The fear of
being single at a certain age (as if being in a relationship is an
achievement).. The fear of a person we “think” is perfect for us,
ending up with someone else.. The fear of missing out on our
childbearing years, and never being able to have children, etc. …..
This type of fear creates desperation…. A desperation that causes us
to disregard all wisdom and intellect, and try to force things into
place in our lives.. (which ultimately leads to pain and heartache).
But if we would trust in God, we’d see that we don’t have to try to
create our own blessing… Proverbs 10:22 says that “The blessing of
the LORD makes rich, and he adds NO sorrow with it.” ….. God knows
what we like! He knows what we find attractive. He even knows the very
number of hairs on our head (Luke 12:7)! So when GOD blesses us with a
mate, He’s gonna make sure that we receive everything we wanted, and more! We don’t have to chase anyone, we don’t have to settle for just
anyone who comes our way, nor do we have to randomly date trying to
find Mr. or Mrs. Right… All we have to do is wait on God… A
slow-cooked meal beats the microwave!
Psalm 37:4 “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the
desires of your heart.” ……. Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the
kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things [Your heart’s desires] will be added to you.” …….. The only relationship
we need to work on, is our relationship with the LORD…. Stay
encouraged (reader), aaaaaand wait……
Pierre E. is a minister, writer and Christian Hip-Hop artist from Los Angeles, CA. After pursuing a career in secular rap music, acting, photography, modeling, club promoting, etc. He discovered that the true meaning of life is only found in Jesus Christ. None of Pierre’s job titles could bring him the peace and joy that he longed for. It was only when he accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior (in February, 2012), that he experienced joy unspeakable. Pierre now dedicates his life to spreading the Gospel of Christ.
Check him out at the following:
- Website: http://www.justpierre.weebly.
- Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/
- Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/
- Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/
Fear is necessary…it alerts us to physical and emotional danger. Although it’s a part of who we are, sometimes we allow past experiences to assign fear to anticipated experiences when it may not even be necessary. Simply put…we’re afraid for no damn reason. A lot of times, fear is an involuntary response based on past conditioning, that we wish we didn’t have. Sorry…the roots of your fear run deep so it’s gonna take some time to get over whatever issues have you emotionally petrified. Really and truthfully eliminating fear is NOT THE POINT. The more important point is, how do you deal with fear when it has you in it’s grip. In this video we share an experience where fear held us hostage…and we also share a similar experience where we acknowledged the fear and stood tall and faced it. Check it out and let us know what you think.
By Marcia Greer
The first thing you need to do long before your children are born or before starting a new job is to make a list of your priorities. Do you want to be a partner by 38? Are you determined to attend every recital performance of your child? Success will not come without some sacrifices. As a result, you don’t want to be caught in the middle of a struggle between of an important business meeting or your child’s birthday without understanding the risks in avoiding either.
Your dedication to balancing your life and work is pertinent. You need to make sure that you are willing to do anything it takes at work and at home to make everyone happy and satisfied. That said, you also need to make sure those around you know you’re dedicated to them as well. If you have to miss a child’s soccer game or a spouse’s art showing, communicate why. Assure them of your love and support. Promise to make it up to them, and then follow through.
You need to find at least a couple hours for yourself each week. This can be as little as a spa treatment or an hour watching trashy TV. You need a moment alone to rejuvenate and feel ready to take on the challenges of the week ahead – don’t feel bad about that – everyone does!!A Solid Support System
Nothing can be accomplished alone. If this means relying on your partner or hiring a nanny, do it! Do not be afraid to ask for help. Hiring a nanny your trust will keep your kids safe and secure. There is no reason for you to feel guilty as long as you make time for each child. It could be as simple as making dinner and eating as a family when you get home from work. Hiring someone does not mean you are failing. On the contrary, a solid support system will make you feel better about your decisions in the long run.Be Prepared for Anything
You never know what will happen. An emergency at home could tear you away from a business trip. An important work party could be on your anniversary. You have to be prepared to roll with the punches and expect things to get sticky at times. Life is not perfect, and you do not need to expect it as such. As long as you understand the risks involved by balancing a full time job and motherhood, then you will be fine.As you can see, the balance is not possible when you use a combination of the above. If you are willing to accept the given challenges, then anything is possible. Just remember that family should come first in times of need and special occasions.
by Aiyana Ma’at
Are you confused about what your next step should be? Are you unsure about what you are here on this earth to do? What makes you smile? What makes your heart beat faster? Where do you find yourself getting that chill up your spine when you experience “that thing”?
Your purpose is closer than you realize.
Join us (Ayize & Aiyana) and learn how to discover your purpose and put ACTION to your passion by clicking the link below. It’s an opportunity to work with us directly, share your passion, and make money. No Excuses yall…
CLICK HERE to start working with us today.
What’s up fam…before we tell you what’s good I’ve got to say that my wife is a big a$$ scaredy cat. She looked back about a thousand time while recording this video all because she was afraid of some squirrels. Can you believe that…smh
Alright on to what this post is really about….
We are so excited about this opportunity that we had to share it with you. In fact …we’d be doing you a disservice if we didn’t share it. The opportunity to speak your voice, give life to your passion, and build a 6 figure/month business from home is right here in your lap. Guess what…you can build it around whatever your interest are.
Yup you heard me….you can finally DO YOU and make money. This has NOTHING to do with tea, herbs, vacuums, or any of the other MLM products that are out there. This has EVERYTHING to do with reawakening your passion, blogging about your passion, inspiring people with your passion, and receiving concrete training on how to monetize your passion.
It’s so simple that you can actually have your blog set up faster than a FB profile.
I know it may be hard to believe but it’s real yall. You’ve seen the success we’ve had from blogging (T.V. shows, Radio Shows, Magazines, etc)….we want to help you do the same.
Doesn’t matter if you’re a complete newbie with a vague idea of what you wanna do and be to a seasoned business owner, blogger, or brand ambassador. Either way—we’ve got you.
We want to help you remove all the confusion so you can focus on your passion. Our gift to you is SIMPLICITY as you raise your blogging voice….SUPPORT as you make your mark…..and SUCCESS as you manifest all that you’re supposed to be.
CLICK HERE ….enter your email…and let’s take this journey together.
Join us (Team Made To Manifest) and let us help you give life and “legs” to your passion.
Stop Playing and Start Pushing
By Ayize Ma’at
Live your best life. Live your life with purpose, meaning, and intention. It’s easy to just go along to get along. It’s easy to not stick out, fit in, blend in, and meet other people’s expectations. Yeah, it’s easy allright. It’s a slow easy death. Death not just to your dreams and desires but your soul. We’re all here to get a particular and very specific job done. God won’t whisper in your ear what he whispers in mine and she won’t whisper in mine what she whispers in the next person’s. Why? Because we’re ll unique and have unique gifts to give. Don’t live your life for somebody else….there life is already taken. DO YOU!!