Join Us Tonight at 9pm EST And Learn How To Heal Your Relationship When Someone Has Cheated

An affair of any sort can have a devastating effect on a relationship. Although the common misconception is that the most affected person is the one that was cheated on, that is not always true. The person who cheated has a lot of personal changes to make if the couples decides to stay together and weather the storm. The healing process is an emotional one and takes some real work from both people

Most people don’t know what to do or where to begin. Not to worry. We will show you HOW TO BEGIN the process of reconciliation.

Is it difficult? Yes. Impossible? Absolutely not. Bring your wine, click the link below and join us tonight at 9pm EST and we will show you how to heal your heart from the hurt of infidelity.

Are You A Slave In Your Relationship? It’s Time To Get FREE!!

The moment you begin to rationalize infidelity and make it a “normal” part of your relationship….your relationship is OVER.  When your feelings about his/her adultery are dismissed and trivialized to the degree where you begin to “accept” the other wo(man)…you are doing yourself a major disservice.  STOP IT!  Stop being a slave in your relationship.  It’s time to mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and maybe even physically GET FREE!!!

If this is you and you know you need help but don’t know who to turn to….CLICK THE LINK BELOW and let us guide you on your journey to healing.


5 Conditions That Make Your Relationship Affair Prone

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By Dr. Richard Nicastro

An affair takes an enormous emotional, physical and spiritual toll on any committed relationship. The very foundation that a relationship is built upon–trust, commitment and loyalty — are shattered, and the post-affair relationship is sometimes unsalvageable because the sense of betrayal runs so deep.

In most instances, affairs don’t happen without warning signs. The person contemplating an affair doesn’t wake up one morning and on the spot decide to betray his/her partner. Becoming affair-prone occurs gradually, and often people are unaware that the seeds of infidelity are being planted.

It is impossible to accurately predict if a person will decide to cheat on his/her partner. There are, however, certain conditions that, if set in motion, can lead to you or your partner becoming affair-prone.

Despite our best intentions at the start of the relationship, under certain circumstances (sometimes painful, extenuating ones), almost anyone can be vulnerable to having an affair. Therefore, becoming aware of the conditions that lead to this vulnerability should be a priority for all relationships.

5 conditions that can make you or your partner affair-prone:

A misunderstanding of normal relationship phases

All relationships and marriages go through a series of changes, some painful. For instance, relationships often begin in the honeymoon phase, where excitement, passion and an intense connection with your partner is the norm. Around the two-year mark (this varies from couple to couple), your relationship leaves this blissful phase and enters a stage where conflict and disagreements are more likely. The personality differences between you and your partner become more apparent and you may find that the relationship is starting to feel like a series of painful compromises and negotiations. It is easy to feel disillusioned and affair-prone at this point, especially if you misinterpret these inevitable changes as evidence that you’re with the wrong person.

Avoidance of important issues

Failure to address issues that are important to you or your partner can erode intimacy and cause you to feel lonely. It is a painful irony to feel alone while in a relationship that is meant to offer intimacy and connection. Lily from San Diego described the destructive effects of avoiding important relationship issues:

“I told my husband over and over that I felt ignored by him. I wanted to spend more time with him every day, and I needed him to be more affectionate with me. But every time I tried to talk to him about this, he became angry and said we have a good relationship and there is nothing to complain about. Over the course of our three-year marriage I began to develop a close friendship with a male coworker and I started fantasizing about being with him. I felt trapped.”

Ignoring each othe’s needs has a cumulative effect–feelings of neglect, hopelessness and resentment slowly build and drive a wedge between you and your partner. When your needs continually go unmet and a sense of futility sets in, you will be vulnerable to having your emotional and physical needs met outside the relationship.

Becoming passive about passion

The passion between you and your partner will not remain steady throughout the life of the relationship. Very often relationships start in sexual overdrive. Over the years, this degree of passion levels off and you may find that the practicalities and mundane aspects of life have replaced the intense fire that once existed.

If the physical and sensual aspects of your relationship are ignored for extended periods of time, your relationship will suffer. If you believe that your relationship should remain spontaneously passionate, without effort (like when you and your partner were first dating or married), then you erroneously believe that the sexual energy that once existed cannot return. It may feel that the only path back to passion is outside of your relationship. The antidote to this affair-inducing mindset is for you and your partner to actively take steps to increase the passion in your relationship, something all couples must do at some point.

The opposite-sex “friend” phenomenon

When you prefer to get your emotional needs met from a “friend” of the opposite sex, rather than your partner, you have moved into an affair-prone danger zone. There are several reasons why you may take this path: the friend gives you the attention you no longer receive from your partner; this friend supports and affirms you in ways your partner used to but no longer does; you feel recharged by any feelings of physical attraction you may have toward this friend. Friendships should complement your marriage (or romantic relationship), not replace it.

Rule of thumb: If you say things to this friend that you wouldn’t say if your partner were in the room, you’re headed down the road of becoming affair-prone.

Negative relationship role models

For better or for worse, we’ve learned how to be in relationships from observing the unions that surrounded us throughout our lives. If you grew up in a family where loyalty and commitment were top priorities, and conflicts were dealt with rather than swept away, you’re apt to bring these pro-relationship qualities to your marriage or relationship. If, on the other hand, you observed infidelity, deceit and a lack of commitment, you may struggle with similar patterns, especially when your relationship hits a rough spot. This does not mean that you are destined to repeat the same affair-prone behaviors as your parents or caregivers. Awareness of these early negative relationship patterns and remaining mindful of how they influence your behavior will give you the means to creating a committed relationship where intimacy is a priority.

Couples are often faced with any one of the above five issues at some point in the course of their relationship. This is to be expected. However, when most (or all) of these conditions are in place, you (or your partner) have entered an affair-prone danger zone. Become conscious of these conditions and discuss this with your partner. This type of focused, active awareness will help you and your partner uproot affair-prone tendencies and replace them with the seeds of commitment and loyalty.

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I Ain’t Happy… And I Ain’t Leaving

By Jada Am I happy? No.  Am I leaving? No.  Do I close my eyes, hold my breath, and clinch the seam in my skirt hoping that the truth will miss me?  Yes.  But the truth never misses me.  I know my man is cheating on me.  How do I know you ask?  I know because he told me.

He did that damn dance of denial for the first three years of our marriage until I discovered her stank a$$ panties tucked inside my pillow case.  Can you believe that bullshit?  I couldn’t either.  I snapped. I almost knocked him out with the porcelin flower vase on our night stand….in my mind that is.

Really, I just asked him how could you…You dirty, non-committal, dum a$$, evil, motha-fuc!a.  Guess what he said….I’m sorry. Husband….Fu#@ your sorry because you Fu(@ed me everytime I closed my eyes, held my breath, and clinched the seam in my skirt hoping that the truth that I knew way before now would miss me.

Am I happy? No?  Am I leaving? No?  Am I healing? Yes.

*Note* The name of the author has been changed to protect her identity.  Should you find yourself in a similar situation feel free to connect with Ayize & Aiyana Ma’at for therapeutic support by CLICKING THE PIC BELOW. relationship experts

You’ve Got To Face Infidelity To Fight Infidelity

By Babara Longsworth

The pain that one feels when he/she was cheated on by his/her spouse is immeasurable. And infidelity is one of the reasons why many marriages end up in divorce. When your spouse has cheated on you, there are a lot of questions that would come to your mind such as were you at fault and why your spouse went astray. If you are the wife, you may be asking yourself, have you not loved him enough? Did you not satisfy him enough? And many other questions that are hard to fathom for a lot of individuals who have encountered this type of marital problem.

It is hard to accept the situation when you are betrayed by someone you have given your trust to. This betrayal can cause a lot of anxiety, as well as physical and emotional pain. How can you overcome this excruciating pain? This kind of pain can possibly cost you, your life’s happiness. This is especially more hurtful when you know that you have given your all in this relationship.

There are some individuals who are in denial when they learn about their spouse’s infidelities. They try to ignore the issue and pretend that everything is fine. Will this kind of reaction help to solve the issue? Will the problem go away, if you just brush it off? The answer is NO. It is a fact that knowing and accepting the truth will hurt a lot, but you have to understand that denying a fact will be more hurtful, in the long run, than accepting the truth.

You need to learn to accept the things that are happening to your marriage or relationship because this is the only way you can rise above all these obstacles. And in order to overcome the pain you may wish to seek professional help. A professional relationship coach may be able to help you and guide you on the right path in order to heal the pain that your spouse’s infidelity has caused. Talking and listening to someone who has experienced what you have experienced, and ended up successful in overcoming the hurt, can be beneficial to you and your family.

You have to remember, you cannot resolve a marital problem, such as infidelity, by ignoring the issue. You have to face the problem and deal with it. It’s helpful to remember that you’re not the only one who is experiencing this type of situation. It is a fact that a large percentage of marriages have dissolved because of infidelity. We cannot deny this and few can avoid this possibility. But there are some things you can do to overcome it and be healed so that you may live the life that you deserve. One filled with serenity, happiness and love.

If You Really Loved Me …You Wouldn’t Hurt Me

VIDEO: Have you ever had someone hurt you in a relationship but swore up and down that they loved you? Your response was probably “if you really loved me you wouldn’t hurt (lie, steal, cheat) me”. What if we said that’s not true. Listen to this video and hear how it’s possible for love and hurt to coexist. “Note* We are not excusing inappropriate behavior…we are examining it.”

I’m Afraid To Re-Commit After The Affair

By: Daryl Campbell

The two of you did your very best to get on with the marriage after an affair. It isn’t that you’re pretending as if nothing took place.

What your mate did damaged you terribly. There is no denying this needless to say however the both of you are still in love with each other. Nobody really wants to terminate the partnership so your most effective strategy is to try to get some sort of counseling plus work to alter your current ways of life. Your significant other asked you for forgiveness and also seemed to be sincerely remorseful for what they have put you through.

Therefore you did accept the apology understanding that there’s a great deal of mutual labor in front of you in order to save the marriage after an affair. The two of you appeared to be aware of that initially, however as time passed you couldn’t help but observe a few of the old routines coming back in regards to your own partner’s tendencies. One example is their secretiveness seems to have came back. To be sure it isn’t as awful as it was when they were unfaithful nonetheless it is still present.

At this point your mind starts flying. All the old suspicions you experienced regarding the mate’s faithfulness are coming back stronger than ever. You don’t desire to head down this path just as before because you are pretty sure this time around you honestly may decide to throw in the towel. No person needs to stay in constant anxiety wondering if their own other half is out there doing something they’ve got absolutely no business doing. Indeed countless husbands and wives finally end up getting divorced rather than going through the headache time and time again.

When you talk to your partner about their secrecy they will say they genuinely were not conscious it was happening and promise to be much more translucent with their activities.

Saving the marriage after an affair sorry to say is not normally likely to be one smooth simple path to healing. There is going to be a considerable amount of fits and starts.. After all making way of living adjustments especially after anything so distressing as adultery will be very difficult for both individuals. Nonetheless there are several questions you could ask yourself combined with observations you can make to see if your relationship is actually making progress. These will help considerably in determining whether your fears and misgivings are warranted.

1. Are They Really Changing? 

Is the significant other giving you empty rhetoric or have they made a real attempt to improve their own habits? If that’s so how sizeable has the change been? Turning over a new leaf isn’t very easy and there is bound to be jolts as you go along therefore it is ok to take that into account. However, if the actual change is few and far between or they fall back into the bad habits too often then this is only going to make your current suspicions more intensive.

2. Clear And Forthcoming

For your relationship to succeed after an affair will mean that your spouse should be very honest and clear in their dealings to you. The wall that is built as a result of infidelity in marriage needs to disappear. No more obscure statements such as “I’m heading out for a little bit.” Instead if your mate is serious about rebuilding the trust then it gets down to letting you know exactly where they’re going, how long and a phone number you are able to get in touch with them. In case your husband or wife has a cellular telephone then they should let you know that it is going to be on.

3. The Apology Plus The Follow-Up

You understand your spouse as a result only you’ll be able to measure the caliber of the actual apology they give you along with the degree of truthfulness and commitment in order to fix your spousal relationship. One thing is obvious. You have to see your significant other taking a highly active role in fixing the problems which may be at the root of their betrayal. This specifically means not letting them make a myriad of lame excuses as to why they did it. There is a huge difference between doing that and genuinely exploring on where the marriage came undone.

You Got To Know When To Hold Em’ Know When To Fold Em’

VIDEO: In life and in relationships there are moments when you find yourself at a crossroad… tired of living like you’ve been living, scared as hell and unsure of what your next move should be. This young lady shares the turmoil she’s been experiencing in her marriage and asks what she should do. Confusion is all around it seems…but I once read somewhere that Confusion is the mental and emotional outgrowth of knowing exactly what needs to be done, and having that knowledge clouded by the belief that you are not good enough, smart enough, or strong enough to do it. There is a fear that if you do what needs to be done, you might not get it right or that somebody will get mad at you, etc. The natural response to this self-defeating mental chatter is for the intellectual mind to shut down resulting in what we call confusion. The truth is that when we find ourselves at these crossroads in our lives we need to trust the small still voice within, do what is necessary, and trust and know that you will make it through.

My Wife Of 15 Years Cheated On Me…And I Went To Jail

What would you do if you found out that your wife of 15 years had been cheating on you?  Check out this video and see how this husband responded.  Do you think their relationship is over and impossible to put back together? Listen in and let us know what you think.


Viewer Letter:

Hi. I am a 40 year old male and my life and marriage changed drastically last year. My wife of 15 years had sex with another man. I found out in April that they had been talking on the phone several times a day and that she had sent him pictures (of what I dont know) I went to jail in April when I found out because I slapped her. I was wrong for putting my hands on my wife but I regret that to this day. I found out the truth about them meeting at a hotel from the guy wife she told me she had found a hotel receipt in his pants dated May 1st plus a letter came for my wife that i read and it was test results from her OBGYN so when i saw the test that were given I asked her about it and she told me the truth in August about yes she did sleep with the guy and she is sorry but she says she didnt know if i loved her or wanted her and if she wanted me after i slapped her, remember I found out in April.She says it only happened once and it will never happen again and before I slapped her she would not have sleep with him. My wife and I are still together and we are trying to work things out but its hard. She became pregnant and I feel it was his baby but she tells me it was our baby but she didnt want anymore kids. I dont believe herbecause she told me before that it may be his but she said she was saying that because she was stunned by the etter from the OBGYN and she says she thought his condom may have broke but she knows it didnt and she regrets hurting me and our family. How do I trust her? How do I trust her again? How can I believe she wont cheat on me again? I do love her but right now im still disappointed in her decisions.

Is It Cheating If…..?

By Robert Weiss, LCSW

Once upon a time infidelity was pretty easy to identify. If a person was having sex outside of his or her primary relationship – with a neighbor, a coworker, a casual acquaintance, a prostitute, or perhaps a total stranger – then he or she was cheating. However, in today’s world of social media, chat rooms, digital pornography, interactive webcams, instant messaging, “adult friend finder” apps, sexting, and the like, the definition of cheating is somewhat murky. Is a live, in-the-flesh interaction still required, or does a webcam encounter with someone half a world away count equally? Does masturbating to Internet pornography qualify as infidelity? What about flirting with sexually available people via Facebook or smartphone apps like Blendr and Ashley Madison?

Let’s face it, for many people, especially those of us over thirty, it’s a new and confusing world. That said, I offer here a simple, straightforwarddefinition of sexual infidelity, developed through more than two decades of work with betrayed spouses and their ultimately remorseful mates.

Sexual infidelity is the breaking of trust that occurs when sexual secrets are kept from an intimate partner.

At the end of the day, sexual infidelity is not so much about the physical sex act – either in the real world or online – it’s about the fact that you are keeping it a secret from your partner, the one person in the world with whom you supposedly share everything. If you’re looking at pornography and your spouse knows about it and is OK with it, then it’s not a problem. But if your spouse doesn’t know, you’re cheating. If you’re chatting on Facebook with an old flame from college and your partner knows and doesn’t mind, so be it. But if you’re keeping these interactions a secret from your partner, you might want to re-think what you’re doing. Basically, if you’re hiding any sexual or romantic behavior from your significant other, you’re engaging in infidelity. It’s just that simple.

Is It Really Such a Big Deal?

Sadly, many cheaters don’t realize how profoundly their secretive sexual behavior can affect the long-term emotional life of a trusting spouse or partner. Usually when the cheated-on partner finds out about the infidelity – and they almost always do – it’s not the extramarital sex that causes the most pain; instead, it’s the fact the partner’s trust and belief in the person that he or she is closest to has been shattered. It makes no difference if the cheating occurred in person or online through the use of porn, webcams, social media, or some other digital technology. In other words, a “virtual world” affair is every bit as painful to a betrayed spouse as an in-the-flesh affair. No matter where or how the infidelity took place, learning about it is incredibly traumatic for the cheated on partner. One study shows it can even result in acute stress symptoms characteristic ofpost-traumatic stress disorder.[i] That’s pretty serious stuff.

In some ways the trauma that arises when a cheated-on partner learns about his or her significant other’s infidelity stems from the fact that while the cheater has obviously known about the extracurricular sexual activity all along and may actually be feeling some relief once caught, the betrayed spouse is usually blindsided by the information. And even when the partner was not fully deceived and had some prior knowledge of the infidelity, learning the full extent of the behavior may be incredibly painful and overwhelming. After all, cheating is usually an ongoing pattern rather than an isolated incident, and knowing about a singular affair with a coworker is scant preparation for learning about a spouse’s enduring array of porn use, webcam trysts, prostitutes, and other affairs. Plus, it’s not just anyone who’s causing this pain. The injury – the trauma – experienced by betrayed partners is amplified by the fact that they have been cheated on by the person they most counted on to have their back. “Betrayal” really is the right word for this.

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