An Open Letter To All The Baby Mama’s

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By Neysa Ellery Taylor

I mean, really, get over it. I know, I know… Easier said than done. But for real, get over it. Why? Because it’s no longer about you – it’s about your kids. Now before you get all bent out of shape, calling your girlfriends and organizing a picket line on my lawn, let me tell you – I was a baby mama at one time. I had my oldest daughter BEFORE I was married. And she wasn’t an infant when I tied the knot. She was old enough to be in several wedding pictures walking around and had a matching outfit. And I was preggers with my 2nd when I got married. So I have some “baby mama street cred.”

And let me tell you, I wasn’t always so smart. I remember cussing out my baby daddy (now hubs) on many an occasion. I remember being so hurt that I didn’t want to see him at all – even if it was a moment when he was coming to pick up his daughter. I was ANGRY, hurt, and emotional. Just ask my friends or my sister-in-law. She had to talk me down many a night when I tearfully wondered, “What the hell happened?” But after many nights of “woe is me-ness,” I had to realize that even if my child’s father no longer wanted me, I should be happy that he wanted to spend time with his child. That is when it shifted. It wasn’t about me anymore.

Was he perfect? Umm, no. Far from it. He made tons of mistakes and so did I. Hell, he still isn’t perfect and neither am I. But the one thing we’ve always had in common is that we put our kids first. Always.

So enough of the autobiography, this is my letter to you: Get over it. Being a baby mama/single parent/single mother/fatherless family is hard work. It is tiring work. And often times, it’s thankless work. From the emotional hardships to the fiscal ones, being a single parent is hard. So why make it harder?

Yes, there are deadbeat dads in the world. Yes, there are fathers who conceive babies and then seemingly fall off the face of the earth. But this post isn’t about that. This post is about dads who want to be involved. Single mom, get over it. I understand. I know, “you loved this man and now he’s gone.” Or “What about the promises that he made to me?” Or “but it hurts to even look at him.” I get it. I’ve been there. But the Word says in 1 Corinthians 13:11 “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” It’s time to grow up. It’s not about you any more. It’s about your child.

I mean think about it logically:

1. Aren’t children better off knowing the love of two parents?

2. Doesn’t your child deserve the best foundation you can possibly give them?

Most moms that I know would answer “yes” to both of those questions. So why are you trying to be a wedge between your child and their father. Let me tell you what it is: Selfishness and Pride. Your pride hurts because you have been left behind. And that is giving root to your selfishness. Believe me, that’s not a good combination.

So stop, take a moment and do an assessment of your former lover/child’s father:

1. Is he a decent person?

2. Does he use drugs?

3. Is he trying to spend time with his kids?

4. If he has other kids, how does he treat them?

5. Would any harm befall your child if he spends time with them?

If all of the answers to the previous questions are positives, then let that man see his kids. It’s really that simple.

So if you need a few action steps, here you go:

1. Get some spiritual counseling to help you deal with your feelings of loss over the relationship. Really, go talk to someone. Spend time with God, not praying for your boo to return, but praying that from this moment forward – you can be the parent/person that He wants you to be.

2. Call the father of your child and ask him to meet you at Starbucks so that you can talk about how to be great parents. If your state has it, take a sample parenting plan with you and just work through the sections. Be open and receptive to the father wanting to spend time with the child. Work to achieve a 50/50 balance with the father.

3. If the father has moved on, ask to later meet her. Make sure she is of good character. If you see an issue (drugs, bad parenting skills), bring it to your ex’s attention without malice. If there is no issue, then praise GOD that your child is around good people. ***Note: you don’t have to like his new boo, but you do have to respect her.

4. Move on. Think about it. Your child is now spending more time with their father. You have something that tons of single parents would love to have – MORE TIME! Take advantage of it. Do some soul searching? Concentrate on yourself. Learn to love again.

Remember: this is about your child. Real mothers, loving mothers, go through the steps because they want their children to have every advantage possible. And you will be rewarded. You are rewarded when you see that report card, when your baby graduates without having had a baby of their own, when your child gets baptized, or when a random adult says “your baby has such good manners.” Those are the times when it is all worth it. Those are the times when you get your pat on the back. And that’s the moment when you know that you have indeed moved out of the way, so that your child can flourish.

Neysa Ellery Taylor lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her husband, Chris, and their 4 children – Asyen, Maya, Preston, and Patrick. An Emmy-Award winning journalist, she hopes to share her passion for marriage and God through her writing. You can read more of her work at www.myriadthatisme.blogspot.com

How Does A Baby Change A Marriage?

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By Sally aka Mrs. Trophy Wife

When you’re pregnant for the first time, everyone gives you the side-eye and says, “This baby is going to change your life and your marriage forever. FOREVER.” In cynical tones, they describe the horrors of nighttime feedings, the distance you feel from your spouse, the way this child is going to be your entire world, and how things will never, ever be the same.

And they’re right…in some ways. But what I really wish is that the cynical tones and horror stories would stop. It’s almost as though society sets up us for failure in our marriages after a child is born. A picture is painted of the incredible difficulty in raising a child AND being a wife, and no one talks about the beautiful aspects. When the rare person comes along and says that they prefer this life to their previous one, everyone thinks they’re lying.

I clearly remember being 37-weeks-pregnant and laying in bed with Braxton Hicks contractions. I was timing them and watching the TV on mute as Taylor slept. He had just driven four hours from Savannah to see me. I was already living with my parents in anticipation for Sully’s big arrival, and Taylor was gearing up for his impending deployment in a mere three weeks. I was absolutely terrified. I’d heard how hard a child is on a marriage. I’d heard how hard a deployment is on a marriage. How in the world were we going to survive both at the same time? I didn’t have much time to think on it because my water broke the next week, and suddenly, we found ourselves in the throes of new parenthood and reality.

I won’t lie and say that it was super easy at first. I was incredibly emotional, and every little word or action could set me off. Taylor laughed while I pumped breastmilk for the first time, and I almost burst into tears. Um, of course he laughed. That shit is funny looking. But after a couple days, we settled into our routine. Taylor would wake up every morning and make me pancakes with Sully on his arm while I napped. I’d take Sully mid-morning while Taylor ran to the gym. Then, we made time to focus on us.

And therein lies the key.

So simple, right? Focus on each other.

But it’s so hard. This new, tiny being is your world. Truly. In every sense, this baby depends on you…for love, for life, for food and shelter. For EVERYTHING, while your spouse is self-sufficient. Your husband can fix his own dinner. He doesn’t need his butt wiped. He doesn’t vomit on you after every meal. He doesn’t look to you to swaddle him and rock him to sleep. He can provide for himself. He has his own wants and needs. And there it goes…you let your focus on his slip through the cracks because he doesn’t need you like this baby does. He feels your focus redirect towards your child, and while he probably finds it beautiful, it also makes him distance himself some. He gives you some space. Steps in when you ask. But slowly and surely, your connection fades.

Ten years down the road, you look at him from across the kitchen table and think, “I don’t even know this man.” All you have in common are the children because they are all you’ve paid attention to for the past ten years.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. Yes, this child and all that follow will require more time and attention that you can imagine. Yes, they need you, but so does your spouse. And you need him. And your child needs a loving, stable family. Taylor and I decided that nothing is more important for Sully and Baby Dos that showing them a mommy and daddy that are in love, that will be there for each other, and that will always provide a comfortable, safe home for them. I don’t want my children growing up to think that screaming, yelling, and being hurtful is the way that a mommy and daddy should fight. Of course, they’ll see us argue at some point. But we have promised to never hurl words like stones and say things we’ll regret. I’m not just blowing smoke up Taylor’s ass. He truly has stepped up to the plate to be an amazing husband and father.

We met at eighteen and nineteen.  We will be parents for the second time at twenty-four and twenty-five. Are we the same people we were when we met? Of course not. But instead of growing apart, we’ve grown together. We’ve shaped each other. Our lives have been on the fast track, and I can hear people snickering now. “Just wait. In ten years, you’ll be as jaded as everyone else.”

But I disagree. Time and age are not the issues. The focus on our marriage, on each other, our needs; those are the issues. We check in with each other. “What do you need from me? What can I do to help you? Are you happy?” Is our marriage perfect? No. And anyone who thinks they have the perfect marriage is probably doomed to fail because they don’t believe their marriage needs work. All marriages need work. EVERYDAY. And people that say a good marriage shouldn’t need work are kidding themselves. Because work is what makes a good marriage. Without it? You have a rift that will just continue to grow. A marriage cannot run itself. I think, unfortunately, media today teaches us that it can. And when times get tough, that’s when you make a break for it.

I never want that for me, my husband, or my children. My husband is my world. My children are my life. And I vow to all them that I’m here for the long run and will always, always be the mama and wife they need from me. And in return? I get an amazing, thoughtful, husband and hopefully, children that understand the love and respect required for a functional relationship.

Again, our marriage is not perfect. I’m not here to tell anyone what they need to do to fix their own marriage. But hopefully, my words can provide a little hope to the mom-to-be, the new mom, or maybe a wife that’s feeling like there’s no hope in her own relationship. There is. It takes work, time, and commitment from both parties, but there’s always hope where there is love.

Sally aka Mrs. Trophy Wife is a twenty-four-year old, crunchy mama to two-under-two, and married to the love of her life. Visit her at her blog Military Mama where she tells the story of her crazy life as one-half of a military couple as they flounder through raising two crazy boys.

I Was Frustrated, Disappointed, And Mad As Hell…BUT…What A Difference A Year Makes (Part 2)

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By Neysa Ellery Taylor

Yesterday, I wrote about the day my husband’s sons were born. I wrote about the range of emotions that I felt and how ill prepared I was to handle those emotions. Today, I am writing about 365 days later. Today is the boys’ birthday. Who would have thought that I would be ordering cake for little ones that I now call my sons? But today that’s where I am.

I wish I can say the past year has been an amazingly glorious time of reconciliation and growth. While that statement is true, I have to note that for each step we’ve taken forward, there have also been some pretty big potholes that we’ve had to overcome.

Like the fiscal aspect. It goes without saying that kids are expensive. When you are pregnant, you get a baby shower with cake, games, and gifts. These gifts help offset the huge financial hit of having a baby. Well, imagine having TWO babies, years after you’ve given away all of your oldest kids’ baby stuff without a shower. From formula to diapers to clothes to cribs, it’s been a tough fiscal year.

Then there is the legal hassle. Call me crazy but I thought that since there are 365 days in a year, one parent would get 182 and the other would get 183. In this age of all sorts of blended families this should be easy, right? Ummm, not so much. This has been a painfully slow, nerve racking process that still isn’t over.

An unexpected problem has been the interference from family. We’ve had the oddest people to totally overstep their boundaries and basically act a fool. For the first few months of the twins’ lives, they were not allowed to come to our home. Because of that my husband and I had one rule – no extended family should meet the boys until the immediate family meets the boys. Not because we were hiding anything. Not because we were ashamed of anything. But we as a family unit had to come to terms with this first. We were the ones who were going to be here day in and day out. And we deserved a few moments to define ourselves and unify before we had to deal with anyone else. That went out the window when family – family that we thought would be rallying around us – decided to ignore our wishes. And not just once but repeatedly. So some family have been dropped from our “family circle.” If you can’t respect my husband as head of our household, and abide by the rules we set for all of our children, then you can no longer darken my door. Harsh? Maybe. But I can not concerned about what extended family thinks when I am fighting for the survival of our family unit.

The question I get asked most often is “how do you and the other woman interact?” I guess in this age of Basketball Wives people expect me to continue the drama. And why write if you aren’t going to keep it honest? While I wish I could say that I’ve been all Joyce Meyer-ish, I’ve gone “Real Housewives” more than a few times. For the longest time I wanted an apology. I wanted her to look me in my face and admit her wrongdoing in the situation. I wanted her to look past her wants and think about the kids and what’s best for them. But alas, we aren’t there. And honestly we may never be there. I may never like her – ever. But I do have to respect her as a parent and eventually forgive her – not for her sake but for my own. But for now, we rarely cross paths. It’s better that we keep it real church-like. You know “let the Lord watch ‘tween us whilst we are apart.” And that is a good first step.

And finally, I’ve embraced my title as mom-mom. Is it made up? Yep. But it’s mine. In the past year I’ve learned that I can love God enough to trust him. I’ve learned that people really can change. I’ve seen my daughters show such compassion and care for their brothers. I’ve learned that forgiveness is real. And I’ve learned that in just 1 year – just 365 days – that my life can be fuller than I ever imagined. I get to live Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Read Part 1 HERE

BLAM Fam: Neysa’s story epitomizes the essence of our company tag line: “Stop Playing. Start Pushing.” For those of you that are going through similar situations or much less….Are you being intentional in your healing and/or growing process?

“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.” ~ Dale Carnegie


“Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer.” ~ Denis Waitley

Neysa Ellery Taylor lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her husband, Chris, and their 4 children – Asyen, Maya, Preston, and Patrick. An Emmy-Award winning journalist, she hopes to share her passion for marriage and God through her writing. You can read more of her work at www.myriadthatisme.blogspot.com.

I Was Frustrated, Disappointed, And Mad As Hell…BUT…What A Difference A Year Makes (Part 1)

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By Neysa Ellery Taylor

A year ago, the phone rang and I received  phone call that I knew was coming but that I dreaded nonetheless.  My husband called to tell me that his mistress was in labor.  Of course, I knew this day would come.  I mean I’m not slow.  I knew that she was pregnant with twins and that unless she was hit by a bus, chances were she would deliver one day.  But as much as I understood that logically.  I did not understand that emotionally.  But lo and behold, the phone rang.  And with the words, “she’s going to the hospital”   I knew that my life was changing although I didn’t know if it was for the better or the worse.

I thought I was ready for this day.  I thought I had prepared.  Our marriage had reconciled and while it had bumpy moments, we were slowly but steadily moving forward.  We had a nursery ready to welcome them to our home.  But I wasn’t ready.  In my mind, the plan went like this.  She’d have kids at the hospital.  After they arrived, we would travel to go see the babies in the nursery.  We would immediately start paperwork for paternity and visitation.  And life would continue.  That was my plan.  But in reality it went something like this.  My husband went to the hospital.  I stayed home with our daughters and almost drove myself crazy.  Big things were happening.  Life changing things were happening.  Things that directly affected my life were happening and I could do nothing about it.  That drove me crazy!  I am a do-er.  I plan, I execute, I do.  Inaction is never an option for me.  But in this instance there was nothing useful that I could do.  So I cleaned my house.  I hung with my daughters.  And then I washed all of the baby clothes that friends had given me.

I washed and gingerly folded clothes that for a child that didn’t come from me.  With each tiny little hanger that I placed in the closet, I wondered what was going on at the hospital?  Would my marriage make it through this situation?  Would my daughters see this as a form of weakness or a lesson in faith?  Would my husband be able commit to being faithful?  How would I feel about the babies?  How would my children feel?  Will my family ever accept the situation?  Am I ready to be a parent to babies again?  Will this woman ever understand the enormity of what she’s done?  Does she finally get it?  Will she use the children as pawns?  I asked this and a million other questions.

Throughout the night my husband would call me with updates.  I wish that I could say that I handled it well.  I wish that I prayed and said loving words of encouragement and understanding.  I wish I could say that.  But instead I’m going to tell the truth.  I cussed him up one side and down another.  After dealing with the affair, after learning of the impending births, after preparing the nursery, we hadn’t emotionally and spiritually prepared for this moment.  And all the hurt that I thought I was past and over, came flooding back in that moment because I knew what it was like to have his child.  I knew how special that moment was.  I knew that in the moment where your child is brought into the world you look at them and want them to have every advantage under the sun.  You want their lives to be free from hardships, especially hardships that you helped to create.  And for the first time, when my husband felt the emotions of holding a child for the first time I wouldn’t be there to share in that moment.

The moment he shared with me was later when he sent me pictures of his sons.    As I looked at the images I searched for signs of him in their faces.  I asked all the required questions, “what are their names?  How big are they?  Are they healthy?”  I had no emotional connection to them.  That wouldn’t come until much later.   But I had hope  – hope that the storms we had already weathered had made us strong enough to weather this tsunami.  And I had faith – faith that all the painful lessons that I learned weren’t in vain.  Faith that however this story ended that God would see me through.

*Check out Part 2 tomorrow to see the miracle that can happen when you allow yourself to go through the process.*

Neysa Ellery Taylor lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her husband, Chris, and their 4 children – Asyen, Maya, Preston, and Patrick. An Emmy-Award winning journalist, she hopes to share her passion for marriage and God through her writing. You can read more of her work at www.myriadthatisme.blogspot.com.

Give Away! Win Self Esteem Boosting Book & Tee From Mom Author: “Mama When Will I Be Popular?”

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By Team BLAM

We are soooo excited! We had the awesome opportunity of interviewing Thomasina Johnson, author of the inspiring book “Mama, When Will I Be Popular”. Thomasina is not just an author, but a wife and mother of 7 beautiful children which she homeschools. She currently attends college in her “spare time” to receive a degree in journalism and is also very active in her local community.

Thomasina, has been writing since she was a child. Her short stories and poems were always the delight of her life. She sought refuge in a pen and paper, to express any and all emotions of her life. Thomasina also openly admits that she has had to struggle with her fair share of “bullies” in one form or another. That is what brought her to a place where she can encourage her own children as well as others to “hang in there, life gets better and makes you stronger.”

Read on to get an inside look at this Super Woman Wife, Mom, & Author as BLAM got up close & personal to find out where the inspiration behind the book comes from.

BLAM: Please tell us a little about yourself, who you are, and what you do.

Thomasina: My name is Thomasina Johnson, I am a wife of 11 years and mother to 7 beautiful children and a published children’s book author. I write books that inspire!

BLAM: I know you’ve been writing since you were a child. Have you always wanted to write books for children?

Thomasina: Actually no, I started writing poems and eloquent letters. Ha,ha,ha

Writing was my refuge a means of expressing feelings. It wasn’t until I had children that I felt the need to tell their stories and reach them and others through mine.

BLAM: What is your book “Mama, When will I be popular?” about?

Thomasina: “Mama, When will I be Popular” is about a young girl who triumphs over teasing, through the loving insightful words of her mom. The message is you can make it past this stage in your life and you don’t have to focus on your here and now letting it change who you are. But you can be stronger because of it and build character that you will take with you in your future.

BLAM: You openly admit that you have had to struggle with your fair share of “bullies” in one form or another. Are some of your past experiences reflected in the book?

Thomasina: Definitely! I have been the odd one and I was greatly impacted by the hurtful words. The page that reads:

“I’m too short. Too tall. Too big. Too small. My hair is not pretty to the other kids at all”.

I wanted to reach every girl with that. I have been all of those things! Sometimes we can be made to think nothing about us is good enough. I have been there too many times.


BLAM: The title alone lets us know that this isn’t your average children’s book. Why is it important to you to encourage and empower children in their struggles?

Thomasina: Because I know where they have been, children are very literal. And they tend to think that their current circumstance is all they have to hope for. It hurts me to share this, but I was blessed… I attempted suicide at 12, because I couldn’t cope. Thankfully I was not successful. I want to give children a glimmer of hope. So they will look at themselves different. They will view others different. And we will all gain a greater appreciation for one another.


BLAM: Wow..your story is truly a testimony. As adults and parents, we sometimes overlook the things that our children are dealing with and going through. How can parents and adults better connect with their children so that they know they have someone to go to when times get tough?

Thomasina: Never ignore the signs. WE know our kids. And we know when something is wrong. Don’t ignore your intuition. Stay involved with them and be on their team. Don’t allow someone else to be on your child’s team more than you. Reach them when they are young. If they are older keep the door open. Let them know after others are done with them that they can always come home.

BLAM: How can people buy your book and connect with you?

Thomasina: I have a website www.booksbythomasina.com I have a face book page www.facebook.com/booksbytj

And my handle on twitter is www.twitter.com/@booksbytj

BLAM: Well, thank you so much Thomasina for talking with us and for being willing to use your past hurt and pain to bring healing, wisdom, and love to others. You are truly an example of what it means (as we say here at BLAM) to “Stop Playing & Start Pushing.”

Read more

Beyonce Says Shopping For Maternity Clothes Is Fun; Tracy Morgan Engaged

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Even though most women find pregnancy to be one of the greatest times in their lives there’s still one part of it that is a drag: and it’s the task of finding stylish and flattering clothes when you have to account for all the baby weight you’ll be putting on. But maternity clothes have come a long way since the 80s, when women were just pairing oversized men’s shirts from the Gap with lots of jewelry. Today, there’s a lot more options for women — in fact, it’s become a trend to wear formfitting clothes so onlookers can see how far along your fetus is into growing his toenails.

But one person who isn’t stressing out about finding maternity clothes is Beyoncé, who told CNN that she actually finds dressing her new figure to be enjoyable. She said, “I’m having so much fun, it has been the most fun time now that [my pregnancy] has been announced and I don’t have to, you know, it was really difficult to conceal. But now that I can be proud and excited about it, I’m having so much fun shopping. It’s great.”

B even admitted sporting clothes from her own label, House of Deréon, even though they’re not intended to be for women who are expecting. She said, “What I’m wearing today is part of the collection and it’s not supposed to be, but it actually is really good for…maternity.” She then elaborated on her fashion mindset, saying “My mother has always taught me that beauty comes from within and what’s exciting about being a woman is you can say, ‘Today… I feel really conservative, today I’m feeling classy. Today I am going on a date and I want to just be a showstopper.’ And you know there is a variety of beautiful clothes that can bring out whatever you feel inside. But it comes from here and you should wear your clothes, they shouldn’t wear you.”

Source: Hollywood.com

TRACY MORGAN ENGAGED!



TRACY Morgan is getting married.

The 30 Rock funnyman has announced his engagement to his girlfriend, model Megan Wallover.

“We got engaged six months ago!” he said.

“We were in San Francisco,” Wallover explained. “It was pretty traditional. It wasn’t anything crazy. He was on bended knee.”

This will be the second marriage for Morgan, who filed for divorce from wife Sabrina in 2009 after 23 years of marriage. The couple has three sons together.

Source: Showbizspy.com

Mama, Why Can’t You Be Proud Of Me? Why Can’t You Praise Me? Am I Not Good Enough?

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If you are a teacher….WATCH THIS.  If you got kids in your neighborhood….WATCH THIS.  If you got nieces, nephews or grand children….WATCH THIS.  If you are the guardian of a child…WATCH THIS.  If you are a parent….WATCH THIS.  If you plan to be a parent….YOU BETTA WATCH THIS.

We first encountered the wisdom of Dr. Joy DeGruy 6 years ago.  To say the least we were truly impacted.  Her words will kick you in the gut and make you aware that IT’S OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO LOVE OUR CHILDREN AND RAISE OUR CHILDREN.  If we don’t give them love….it’s very easy (considering the world we live in) for them to internalize self hate.  We appreciate you Dr. DeGruy.  B Intentional Yall!

Dr. Joy is a nationally and internationally renowned researcher, educator, author and presenter. She is an ambassador for healing and a voice for those who’ve struggled in search of the past, and continue to struggle through the present.A highly skilled and educated activist for social justice, Dr. Joy reaches people on the community level and has a captivating way of persuading others to search for a deeper understanding of themselves. CLICK HERE to visit her website.

VIDEO: Simply Beautiful! Husband & Wife Record The Home Water Birth Of Baby Number 7!

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By Aiyana Ma’at

Bringing a new life into the world is one of the most beautiful and life changing experiences a couple can have.  I remember the birth of each of my 4 children and I promise you–it was as if the universe shifted (as did my consciousness and awareness) each and every time. Motherhood is truly a gift and I am enjoying the presents in my 4 little ones each and every day. 🙂

A few weeks back one of our wonderful twitter followers sent us a video of a mom & dad of 6 (now 7) having a Home Water Birth. This family recorded their experience and shared it on YOUTUBE. And, it was moving to say the least. So, all of you mommies (and mommies to be) out there, sit back and take a few moments to take in the birth of the Ysrayl family’s newest addition Nasir Inash.

We will be releasing our interview with this young beautiful married couple later this week. You’ll get a peek inside of how they work together at raising their large family and how they stay connected as a couple amidst all of the responsibilities that come with being Mommy & Daddy. Visit mom of 7, Shamiparyah Ysrayl’s, website for more about her experience. Enjoy the birth of Nasir!

Editor’s Note: Home Birth’s are a deeply debated issue in the United States. We encourage you to always do your own research and seek the advice of a medical professional you trust. Following are some resources for those considering the possibility of a home or water birth:

Click HERE to visit Shamiparyah’s website which she says “was created out of my desire to be more effective in answering the many inquiries that I’ve received over the last couple of years. The answers and suggestions given are simply based upon my years of research and the application thereof in my personal life and in those of my household.”

Ckick HERE to read an article published in the Los Angeles Times titled: At Home Birth has Pros and Cons

Click HERE to read the American Medical Association’s Position on Home Birthing.

Click HERE to read information about Home Birthing from the American Pregnancy Association.

Read HOME BIRTH: An Annotated Guide To The Literature published by the Division of Midwifery in the Faculty of Medicine, University of British Columbia in collaboration with the American College of Nurse-Midwives and the Midwives Alliance of North America.

So Official! Beyonce And Jay Z Announce Baby On Board

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Last night at the VMA’s Beyonce in stunning fashion “freed” herself by exposing the secret she’s been hiding from the public for some time…..she’s pregnant.  After performing “Love On Top” she dropped the mic, unbuttoned her jacket, and began rubbing her belly….instant classic.  Jay Z was grinning from ear to ear as the audience clapped and cheered.  This moment…their moment was definitely memorable.  Congratulations Jay Z and Beyonce on your pregnancy.  We at BLAM wish you health and happiness as you continue to build your family.  To check out their announcement….see the video below.

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, Beyoncé

Jada Pinkett Smith Puts Her Kids Before Her Career

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Actress Jada Pinkett-Smith is featured on the cover of the latest issue of Redbook magazine. In the issue, the actress reveals that she gave up her career so she could concentrate on raising her children Jaden, 12, and Willow, 10.

She says to Redbook magazine, “I had to make choices. Believe me, I would still be on the road with my band, Wicked Wisdom, and making as many movies as I can a year, and doing all sorts of other things if I didn’t have the responsibility of a family. But I have children with their own talents and dreams, and I know I have to be standing next to them for that journey.”

She adds, “It was excruciating, completely excruciating. When Jaden was auditioning for The Pursuit of Happyness, my band had just gotten an offer to open for Guns N’ Roses in Europe. For me, that was unbelievable. But the choice was: I could be a rock star, or I could be on the set with my son to make sure he was healthy and happy. We all know how that story ended!”

The working mom also admits that she would prefer to raise her children in Hollywood than “in the streets of Baltimore or Philly”.

“Let me tell you what I fear most: Them growing up like I did, in a house with drugs in a war zone, where if I walked out my door I could be shot. Hollywood ain’t nothing compared to that! Growing up in the streets of Baltimore, or the streets of Philly where Will grew up — I’d rather have my kids here. It still makes me nervous that they’re part of something that isn’t totally real, but it’s up to Will and me to teach them what’s real and what’s not.”