A Love Letter To My Husband: From Aiyana To Ayize

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Ayize doesn’t know I’m doing this but I just had to…. I was so inspired by a song I heard yesterday on one of my Facebook Friends pages. It just made me think about my relationship with my bestfriend, my boy, my confidante, my lover, my husband—Ayize Ma’at and I knew what I needed to do.

Dear Ayize,

I’m taking the time today to make sure you know…… I want you to be ever so clear about the depth of my love for you and my commitment to you, our marriage, and our family. I need you to know the impact you’ve had on my life. Ayize, the love I have for you is overwhelming and indescribable. I heard a song yesterday by Kindred The Family Soul. It’s called “Stars” and I just “felt” it when I heard it. But, the reason I felt it baby is because of you. It’s because of you that the wounds that my “on again, off again” father left early on in my life haven’t stayed as deep and painful as they used to be. It’s because of you that today I can say that I honestly know what it feels like to trust someone  completely. It’s because of your willingness to hold on tight and never let go that I know what commitment is really about in the first place. It’s because of your cool calmness that I have been able to really look at myself and learn new ways of being and communicating. It’s because of your ability to affirm me and allow me to be me that I have the self assured confidence that I have about myself….it’s because of you Ayize. When I begin to doubt myself and feel fear creeping up from behind I now know to deliberately stop whatever I’m doing, pause, and say to myself the words you first said to me “Just be”. It’s because you aren’t ashamed to say you love me, respect me, and see greatness in me that it makes it all the more easy for me to look at myself and find the greatness too. It’s because of your honesty with me…your willingness to call me out but then kiss me on the forehead or the nape of my neck that I have been able to learn how to accept and grow from criticism instead of letting it seep into my spirit and kill my self-esteem. It’s because of your vulnerability and your sharing your secrets with me that I feel and know that I’m important enough and worthy to be trusted. I love traveling life’s journey with you baby. So much of who I am today and have yet to be is because of you. Thank you King. I love you. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.

Here are the lyrics that inspired this letter. Listen to the song below.

Listen to the song below…

“We’ve come so far

Stars look up to you, baby

My heart belongs

Right here next to you, baby”

As always, leave a comment or submit a video response. Anyone out there inspired to do their own video love letter to their sweetie? Send it in and we’ll put it up! Here’s the song that inspired my love letter to my husband…..

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I Love Him But He’s Locked Up

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VIDEO: Would you stay in a relationship with someone that’s locked up or would you remain friends and wait on the opportunity to rekindle the passion upon their release? We weigh in on this issue in an attempt to help a young lady regain some perspective about her situation. She writes in basically asking should she trust the feelings of love she has and should she trust everything he’s saying to her. Listen in as we attempt to help her resolve these unsettling feelings of whether she should stay in the relationship…..or go live her life. Leave a comment or submit a video response with what you think.

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My Husband Is Lazy…What Do I Do?

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VIDEO: Have you ever been in a relationship where you felt used? It may not have begun that way but over time the spark in the relationship fizzles as your partner leans on you so much it’s hard to stand. In this video we address a viewer who feels like her husband isn’t carrying his weight. She says he’s lazy and is seriously questioning the future of their relationship. How have you dealt with a lazy mate? Leave a comment or submit a video response letting us know what you think.

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VIDEO: Everybody wants happy and healthy relationships that they feel cared for and respected in. A lot of people define success as having exactly that. If everybody wants happy and healthy relationships why doesn’t everybody have them? Maybe it’s because as individuals we’re not bringing “happy and healthy” to the table…. If you want good communication, hot sex, solid commitment, honesty, quality time that keeps the two of you bonded, and conflict that you manage versus it managing your relationship—then you’ve GOT TO DO SOME WORK! Great relationships don’t just magically happen. They come about as a result of two people doing the easy fun stuff and the hard work that gets on their very last nerve and is about to drive them crazy! We attended the well known and nationally recognized Smart Marriages Conference in Orlando, Florida last month. While there we talked with good friends of ours and colleagues Reggie & Peachie Williams about why they think it’s important to take time to B Intentional about what you’re putting into your marriage. A quick tip: Focus on what’s being said—not my crazy camera work! The camera’s all over the place yall so cut us some slack. 🙂 When you finish listening in ask yourself “What am I getting out of my marriage?” Now, sit down and try your best to get in your head that whatever you’re getting out of your relationship is a DIRECT REFLECTION of what you’re putting into it. It really is that simple.

Reggie & Peachie Williams are the creators of Courageous Conversations & Peachie’s Nectar. For workshop information contact them at workshops@courageous-conversations.org & to learn more about and receive Peachie’s Nectar contact Peachie at Peachiepw@gmail.com.

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VIDEO: What comes up for you when think about college? Dorm life, new friends, term papers, parties, & commitment? A young man writes in sharing that he is in love and he and his sweetheart are about to go to separate colleges. He wants to know whether they should try to make a long distance relationship work or…or should they temporarily postpone their relationship until after graduation. We weigh in…but what do you think?

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VIDEO: You never really know a person until you witness them handling hardship. If you are thinking about taking your relationship to the next level pay close attention to how your partner deals with difficulty, disagreements, and rejection. How they cope in moments of mild or significant conflict will help you decide whether this person is the one you truly want to spend your life with. Most folks we know try to avoid pain & conflict at all costs. But, we believe conflict is a normal and natural thing. Yes, we will even go as far as to say it’s a GOOD thing. Does it feel good? No. Is it necessary? Yes. If we never experience the strain and stress of pain and conflict with the one we say we love then we never get a chance to truly experience the remarkable healing power of forgiveness, repair, and emotional and spiritual maturation with another person. I once read somewhere that if you are comfortable you are not growing. While most of us would love to stay in La La land with our sweethearts 24/7 that is just not possible and we would dare to say it just isn’t healthy either. We believe one of the greatest gifts of our most sacred relationship is its ability to help “grow us up” mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. We are not supposed to stay the same. We are all supposed to evolve and the one we love more than anything yet gets on our last nerve at the same time is the perfect one to help us do it.! At the end of the day it’s really OK to “go through” before you say I DO.

FREE “How To Avoid Falling For A Jerk or Jerkette” Introductory Class & Information Session

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HOW TO AVOID FALLING FOR A JERK OR JERKETTE

Jerks, losers, men and women who ain’t about nothing…call them whatever you want—we will show you how to avoid them and find “the one” that’s right for you. This class will help you break destructive dating patterns that have kept you from finding the love you deserve.

Learn to:

*Ask the right questions to inspire meaningful, revealing conversations with your partner.

*Judge character based on compatibility, relationship skills, friends, and patterns from family and previous relationships.

*Resolve your own emotional baggage so you’re ready for a healthy relationship.

Come out on August 28th at 4:30pm and meet your instructors and other singles determined to pick a partner who’s right for them. Experience a sample class, meet other singles, ask questions, and get details about Fall classes & groups.

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A Moment Of Intimacy Knee To Knee…

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VIDEO: It’s good to take time in your relationship to connect in the midst of the busyness of everyday life. We have to B Intentional about making time to “get still & get connected in” with our partner. Sometimes that moment of intimacy where ears and hearts are open is experienced during a back rub, a foot massage, or…as we show you in this video…Knee to Knee. B Intentional about checking with your souse and exploring what’s on each other’s spirits. Take a peek inside of our relationship as we demonstrate this exercise to you and then commit to trying this in your own relationship. It certainly can’t hurt! It’s a good thing….your relationship is thirsty for it.

FREE “Basic Training For Couples” Introductory Class & Information Session

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B INTENTIONAL, LLC

PRESENTS

Spend time with other couples looking for the same thing you want, a great relationship or marriage. Fabulous relationships don’t just happen. They happen because couples learn the skills to make it happen. If you don’t work for your relationship it won’t work for you. Learn why marriage is important, the sweetness of surrender, how to move from “I” to “We”, communication skills, how to manage conflict, hot monogamy, and so much more!

Come out on August 28th at 2pm and meet your instructors and other couples determined to make their relationship last. Experience a sample class, meet other couples, ask questions, and get details about Fall classes & groups.

FOR MORE DETAILS AND TO REGISTER CLICK HERE!

REGISTER NOW! CLICK HERE!