Fellas if you’ve got any female friends you’ve probably heard them mention one if not all of the 8 annoying club behaviors on this list.  What’s funny is that even though you know it…you really could give a damn because there’s always some woman, inebriated or not, that will give you the time of day regardless of what you do.  But fellas…despite all of that, let this list (from Madamenoire.com ) serve as a reminder of what the majority of women can’t stand about your behavior at the club.

#1 The Shackle Grab
I don’t know when it ever became acceptable to grab a woman in public but the shackle grab is one of the worst things you can do. Wrapping your entire man paw around my delicate wrist is not going to persuade me to dance with you. In fact, now I’m disgusted. Make yourself scarce.

#2 Run Up and Get it
Sometimes women are just as much to blame as men are for this tacky tactic. If you’re bent over at a 90 degree angle, giving dudes the eye in between booty claps you’re pretty much asking for it. But that’s not me. So I don’t understand why you took my fully erect, two step to mean that I wanted you to slam your junk into my booty. Ugh…no! You sir get the swift stank face as I relocate.

#3 Crushing my toes
Now you don’t go to the club to dance alone, so there’s always one dude who will approach you with the right combination of charisma, politeness, and at least a sprinkle of cute. When you find that combo you’ll be inclined to dance with him. And while we won’t be inclined to totally dismiss you, stepping on my toes during a slow dance is a serious mood killer. I’m trying to be cute tonight and you stepping on my baby toe, making me limp across the dance floor is not cute.  Gots to be careful.

#4 Interrupting the “girl” circle

Girls Night Out is in no way a new concept; yet, without fail some dude will interrupt the girl circle by jumping in right as your song comes on. Maybe it has something to do with the extra sparkle that appears in your eye when the DJ starts spinning your jam. All that aside, now is not the time.

#5 Chafing Skin

The only thing worse than being grabbed by a man in the club is being grabbed by a man who seems to be shedding his skin. This problem is most prevalent in the wintertime. It’s always these men that want to rub up and down the entire length of your arm. Eeew. Could you not? I don’t want to take your dead skin cells home with me.

#6 Trying to get my life story

You opened your heart and decided to dance with dude for one song. Instead of letting you concentrate on your moves, this man wants to engage in full on conversation. Questions like “where are you from?” “do you live around here?” and “what do you do for a living?” are too much for the dance floor. If I’m feeling you after the dance then we can get into the first level personal information.

#7 Liquid Conversations

You know the club scene is loud, so you’ll have to lean and do the muffled scream all night. (Hence the reason why you shouldn’t be trying to get my life story.) The more talking the more likely you’re going to start spraying. The fact that you’re leaning in means your saliva will most likely land in a place I don’t want it, like my upper lip, which will immediately start burning. All conversations should be kept to a minimum until we can transition to a quieter area or I decide to bless you with my phone number.

#8 Not knowing when your time is up

Men are not good at reading body language. As visual as they are, sometimes…most times they just struggle with distinguishing the difference between “feelin’ you” and “fed up”. When your time is up baby, exit gracefully. Thanks.

Ladies are there any other No No’s that brothas need to know about?

By WisdomIsMisery

Before I begin this post, I need to dispel a few rumors. For one, there is no black women marriage crisis. That is a myth, mostly broadcast by news outlets looking to gain easy views, reads, and rehashed blog topics. However, black women do marry later – 75% will marry by age 35. Secondly, there is no interracial marriage crisis. According to two doctorates from Howard and Morehouse University, “Six percent of married black men who are high school dropouts have a white wife and 92% have black wives.  Among black men with college degrees, 10% have a white wife and 85% have black wives.” When eight of 10 black men will marry a black women, it doesn’t seem like much of an epidemic. Lastly, no list is all-inclusive.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way.

Lack of appropriate role models.

This is not meant to disrespect single mothers. Honestly, having a bad father in the home is no better than having an absent father. No, this is about a lack of role models for young black men, regardless of their paternal relation or non-relation to the young man in particular. A number of black men don’t have enough appropriate role models to look up to, speak to, and/or imitate. They must figure out how to be men on their own, because they were never shown in practice what being a man entails when they were young and impressionable.

Result: Since a number of black men never observed the roles and responsibilities a man is supposed to play in a woman’s life as a husband/father – other than what they’ve seen on TV, movies, or heard in music – they marry later. Many black men have to figure out their place in a woman’s life through trial and error. Naturally, this ‘on the job training’ takes longer, and we are assuming they ever figure it out.

“The economy, stupid.” – James Carville

I’m not going to deliver a tirade about ‘The Man’ holding the black man down. I’m simply going to state a few universal facts. Fact: Unemployed people tend not to get married. Fact: In May 2012, the national unemploymentrate in the United States was 8.2 percent. For African American men it was 13.6 percent. For context, it was 13.6 percent in 2007, too.

Result: It’s hard to get married when you’re statistically and historically underemployed.

Black men don’t view black women as a team member.

Many men view women as another achievement once they’re successful. While we can unite as a people when we are called upon for a cause, on the day-to-day front black men and women have a very independent structure. To the best of my knowledge, we are the only culture that champions the ‘independent woman’ and ‘M.O.B.’ manifestos in song. I’m not saying this is good or bad. I am saying it wasn’t always this way. Many young black men and women view themselves as independent. In fact, to be seen as co-dependent is seen as a weakness not a strength. If we don’t see a need for each other, is it any wonder why we act like we don’t need each other?

Result: Many black men feel they need to be established before they can approach the woman they want or he won’t be “worthy” of her. Further, some women believe, as Kanye West so ingeniously put forth in song, “I aint sayin she a gold digger but she aint messin with no broke n….” Success takes time, especially when you’re determined to do it alone instead of as a team.

More black women are going to college than black men.

This one is twofold. First, there was a time in America where you could still make a decent income even without a college education. Presently, 60 percent of new jobs require a college degree – many employers require a degree for entry-level work simply because they can. In 2011, women of all races obtained college degrees faster than men. For African American women, this rate was almost 2 to 1. Secondly, a number of studies have shown college graduates, both men and women, prefer marrying college-educated partners.

Result: Unfortunately, in this case, perception is reality. Women have fewer college-educated men to “choose” from and men have fewer women willing to “settle” for them if they don’t attend college.

CLICK HERE to read more.

By Matt Fuller

The social element of online dating allows us to explore all walks of life – however before you start to hit on every appealing profile, give yourself the best chance of success by learning the 10 commandments of online dating. Dating online is a universal matchmaking tool that will unlock opportunities you thought never existed.

If you are tired of sleeping alone every night, or have just come out of a long relationship and are perhaps stuck for ideas on expanding your social network please read on…

1. Knowing who you are.

Figure out what it is you are searching for in a partner. If it’s just meeting new people in your spare time for casual relationships with minimal commitment, make this known in your profile – likewise if you seek something more permanent. Single people often join a dating site without even meeting anyone in person. Dating sites with chat rooms provide a means of company for people who are not ready for realism but seek fantasy.

2. Seek advice.

You probably know someone that has had experience with online dating. Seek advice from this person on what chat rooms and online dating sites are worth joining. It’s a pretty important decision to take the leap into the cyber land of romance and the best advice you can get is from someone you already know.

3. Take it slowly.

As with anything is life, taking your time to research your options will probably end up saving you time in the long run instead of rushing in and relying on trial and error. The whole idea of online datingis that it provides the opportunity to fully assess potential dates before a real life face to face date.

4. Just be honest – it works!

When you create an online dating profile or engage in an online chat, it provides a means for you to highlight your good points – which is a good thing. But after establishing online contact with someone for a period of time, many online singles neglect to paint the true and complete picture of themselves which can set the scene for a disappointing first date. If your profile picture was taken before you shaved your head – make it known before your first date.

5. Prioritize.

When you first join the dating site of your choice you will be a little shell shocked at the amount of profiles to choose from. Many online singles make the mistake of shooting off emails to multiple people. Try to be selective with whom you contact and make each introduction personalized to them based on their profile description.

6. Online dating – not for the gullible.

Snakes in the grass are common on the web. Take down information about people you chat to so you can verify their details at a later date. Check with others in the chat rooms to see if anyone can vouch for this persons character. Never take anything beyond the chat room if your gut feeling says otherwise.

7. Brush up on your chat room manners.

By entering a chat room session doesn’t mean you can start saying anything you like to anyone you like. Imagine that you are sitting at a public park, would you start mouthing off suggestive comments to every attractive person that passed you by – hopefully not! Consider this when in a chat room and start the conversation off in a very low key manner.

8. Big bang for your bucks!

Add up the cost if you were to go bar hopping or on singles holidays for 3 months. The cost would run into the thousands of dollars. By joining one of the popular online dating sites for 3 months you could expect to pay around $120.00 and get 24/7 live access to dozens of singles within a square kilometer of where you live. In recent times, ad funded free online dating sites have also emerged – need we say more? the decision to sign up to online dating sites starts with your wallet or purse.

9. Strike while the iron’s hot.

You need to stay in touch with your dating site and check your mail/inbox regularly. If you become too unavailable the person trying to contact you will move onto someone else. That’s the beauty of online dating, there’s so much choice – if one door closes another opens.

10. Safety first.

When you agree to meet someone in person, do so in a public place. Provide your own transport, and have a quick exit strategy in place in case your date isn’t the person you perceived them to be.

Matt Fuller writes about a number of topics that relate to social networking, dating sites in Australia and social media. Matt has been an online dating consultant for nearly a decade.