Some Women Want To Get With Married Men…… Why?

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VIDEO: What’s the attraction in messing with someone that doesn’t belong to you and messing up their relationship? There are a lot of woman out there that intentionally go after married men. Where is the respect ? Some folks are so focused on satisfying their own needs that they ignore the sacredness of marriage and the communal consequences of engaging in this “me first” behavior. This ain’t good!

Stephanie Modkins, an associated content.com writer, offered up her thoughts in an article she wrote with the following 5 reasons she thinks women date married men:

#1 The sex is hot. Just like a lot of men, many women crave sex. As a result, when some women meet a man that they have an undeniable sexual attraction to, they rush forward and pounce. Although it’s not always admitted to, this is one reason why some women just can’t let a married man go. They love the sex and, as a result, refuse to end the relationship.

#2 She doesn’t think it’s hurting anyone. Have you ever heard the saying ‘what you don’t know won’t hurt you?’ This is a statement that some females who play the role of the other woman live by. They feel that as long as nobody knows (especially the wife) what they’re doing, it’s okay. As a result, this woman will never stop seeing the married man until things blow up.

#3 She loves the money. Some women barter sex for money. This exchange is as old as the bible. As a result, if a man has a lot of cash that he’s willing to spend on her, the other woman will go for it without any regret. It’s not that she want’s to hurt anyone or even be the other woman, she just needs help paying her bills.

#4 She believes all men are dogs.You’d think that a woman who thinks so lowly of all men wouldn’t wind up in a dirty affair. However, this idea is wrong. Because she thinks all men are dogs, she expects very little from them – including faithfulness. So it seems natural to her that a married man would cheat since that’s what all men do anyway. If you ask her about the wife, nine times out of ten she’ll tell you about the number of times she’s been cheated on by a man. It’s her justification for her actions.

#5 She needs to feel powerful. This point is where I believe Monica Lewinsky falls. Sleeping with the President of the United States probably lifted her self-esteem and made her feel powerful. It’s a trap women fall into who like to sleep with high-profile men. They get their energy and life from an accomplished man instead of finding other ways to build themselves up.

In conclusion, the other woman might just be holding onto a married man for reasons outside of love. She has her own agenda and unless it’s upset in some type of way, she will never let go. Monica Lewinsky capitalized on her infamy by writing a book and starting a business.

What do you think B Intentional Family? Why is it so easy for some women to go after another woman’s husband? Leave a comment or submit a video response letting us know what you think.

Announcing The Winner Of 7 Marriage Movies & Books!

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All last week we did Give Aways to celebrate our 100th video and to thank each and every one of you, B Intentional Family, for supporting & participating in the work of uplifting, examining, and keeping it real about love & marriage in our community.

Well, we’ve got a Winner for the fourth Give Away of the week! It’s Brooke!!! Yay!!!

We asked for folks to leave a comment with one of the most important things they felt black people need to work on to improve our relationships.

Here’s what Brooke said:

One of the things black people need to work on is valuing each other. My husband and I were just talking about how so many people in general don’t value life…the same is true for relationships. We need to see each other as wonderfully, worthy people who matter. Each of us has value, and in our relationships we need to honor that and treat each other as important – which doesn’t happen as much as it should.

Brooke won 7 Marriage Movies & Books!

Get ready to get reading, watching, & growing Brooke! Congratulations!!!

Do You Really Understand The Power Of Touch In Your Relationship?

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VIDEO: Do you have special people in your life? Is your man or woman a unique, irreplaceable, and special part of your existence? If the answer is yes….let me ask you….does he/she know? It’s important that you let the people you love know that you love them and why you love them. ….. It doesn’t always have to be through words..sometimes a simple touch can say what words can never convey. Listen in to truly understand why & how you should Recognize your sweetheart through touch, Reassure you baby through touch, and Revitalize yourself and the relationship through touch. You and your relationship deserve it.

Final Chance To Enter For 5 Free Give Aways!

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Dear B Intentional Family,

It’s been a fabulous week of Give Aways and, of course, talking about relationship joys,triumphs, difficulties, and drama. Today is your FINAL CHANCE to ENTER TO WIN one of these great Give Aways that we know will be a blessing in more ways than one. Below are links to all of the Give Aways in case you missed one or some. All Give Aways will be closed for entry at MIDNIGHT TONIGHT.  Put your name in the hat and have an Intentional Saturday!

Give Away # 1: FREE Dinner & A Movie For 2!

Give Away #2: FREE $50 American Express Gift Card!

Give Away # 3: FREE Home Chrome Secret Dancer Pole, How To DVD & Music CD Set, & A $50 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card!

Give Away # 4: FREE Relationship Care Package -7 Marriage Movies & Books!

Give Away # 5: FREE $150 TicketMaster Gift Card To The Event Of Your Choice!

Week Of Give Aways #4: Enter For Your Relationship Care Package: 7 Free Marriage Movies & Books!

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We’re celebrating our 100th Video with an entire week of give aways and today marks Give Away # 4! We’re giving away 7 Free Marriage Movies & Books! Knowledge is Power. Doing something with that knowledge is even better! Go ahead and Enter! Leave a comment below with one of the most important things you feel black people need to work on to improve our relationships. Don’t forget to leave your email address in the email field so we can enter you and contact you if you’re the winner. If you want to be anonymous then make up a name when leaving a comment—just be sure that your email address is correct. The winner will be selected randomly. It won’t cost you a thing. This is our way of saying thank you for helping www.Blackloveandmarriage.com become it all it has (and all it is yet to be!) The winner will be announced next Thursday, Oct. 14th. Happy Thursday! See you back tomorrow for Give Away #5!

You Saved Me

With African American marriage numbers at an all time low and African American divorce numbers at an all time high the hopes of positive, lasting, relationships look bleak until now. Executive Producers Lamar and Ronnie Tyler bring real married couples to the screen to chronicle the greatest love stories ever told. These real couples explain how their marriages had a direct impact on their lives. Featuring candid and transparent looks inside of the hardships, trials, and ultimate success stories of these amazing couples. YOU SAVED ME offers an unprecedented look inside of real relationships and what is required to sustain them.

Not Easily Broken

A couple’s strength and faith are tested after the wife is injured in a car crash and husband becomes attracted to another woman.

Fireproof

A heroic fireman locked in a failing marriage accepts his father’s challenge to take part in a 40-day experiment designed to teach both husband and wife the true meaning of commitment in this faith-based marriage drama starring Kirk Cameron and Erin Bethea. When he’s battling blazes, Capt. Caleb Holt (Cameron) adheres to the old firefighter’s adage about never leaving your partner behind; back at home, it’s an altogether different story. Caleb and his wife Catherine (Bethea) have been married for seven years, but lately arguments over career, housework, finances, and outside interests have driven the once-happy couple hopelessly apart. Just as Caleb and Catherine prepare to officially dissolve their marriage, Caleb’s father John (Harris Malcolm) presents his son with a most unusual challenge: commit to a 40-day experiment called “The Love Dare,” and take one last shot at saving his marriage. While at first Caleb agrees to take a chance on “The Love Dare,” the discovery that it’s closely tied in with his parent’s newfound faith causes him to momentarily reconsider. Still, Caleb carries on with the experiment despite being constantly rejected by his skeptical, embittered wife. When Caleb asks his father how he can be expected to love someone who refuses to give him a fair chance, John tells his son that this is precisely the same love that God shows for humankind. Now, with a little help from above, the man who makes headlines for saving lives will fight to be a hero to the one person who matters most — his wife.

Happily Ever After: A Positive Image Of Black Marriage

From the creators of the award winning website Black and Married With Kids.com comes a ground breaking documentary set to challenge negative stereotypes surrounding marriage and parenting in the black community. Couples and experts discuss topics such as the image and portrayal of black marriages and families, the effect the Obamas will have on marriage in the black community and the importance of parenting.

The Conversation:

How Black Men & Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships

African Americans have always turned to family in times of need. But now, this proud and strong legacy is in peril. Black men and women have stopped communicating effectively, threatening the relationships and marriages necessary to sustain the Black family. In this moving and practical book, Hill Harper — bestselling author, NAACP Image Award winner, and CSI: NY star — undertakes a journey both universal and deeply personal in search of answers to this dilemma.

Turn Up The Heat: A Couple’s Guide To Sexual Intimacy

One of God’s greatest gifts is the pleasure and privilege of sex within marriage. Dr. Kevin Leman knows even married people have lots of questions about sex, but sometimes they feel too embarrassed to ask or don’t know where to turn for the best answers. For all those questions readers couldn’t imagine asking their pastor or even their close friends, Dr. Leman is ready with open ears and expert advice. Often asked about sex and intimacy as he speaks and travels, he bets that some of those questions are the ones readers want answered too. With his trademark humor and wit, he offers frank answers to the burning questions all of us have about sex. Covering such topics as God’s original intentions for sex, body image, attraction, expectations, sex drive, sex after children arrive, and much, much more, Turn Up the Heat is comprehensive in scope and just what the doctor ordered. Readers will not only get the answers they crave but plenty of the hearty chuckles they expect from Leman. Perfect for newlyweds or couples who have been married for years.

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret To Love That Lasts

Are you and your spouse speaking the same language? While love is a many splendored thing, it is sometimes a very confusing thing, too. And as people come in all varieties, shapes, and sizes, so do their choices of personal expressions of love. But more often than not, the giver and the receiver express love in two different ways. This can lead to misunderstanding, quarrels, and even divorce. Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Dr. Gary Chapman identifies five basic languages of love and then guides couples towards a better understanding of their unique languages of love. Learn to speak and understand your mate’s love language, and in no time you will be able to effectively love and truly feel loved in return.Skillful communication is within your grasp!

Never Underestimate The Importance Of ‘Me’ Time

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VIDEO: A viewer who is a new wife and new mom recently wrote in and shared how overwhelmed she is with her two new roles (and all the responsibilities they bring) . She says the one thing she would love to have is about an hour each day to herself to do whatever she wanted….sit and do nothing, watch mindless TV, have a drink…whatever! The problem: she feels guilty for wanting, in her words, “to get rid of baby and hubby”.  Ok, so my (Aiyana’s) initial thought was….Get over it!! Take an hour, shoooot take 2, have 2 drinks, watch some dumb TV and feel good about it. Early on in my marriage, 1 child in, my husband used to make me so mad because he would routinely make sure he took him some ‘me ‘ time. He would let me know “I’m getting ready to take a nap for a couple of hours” or “Going to the movies baby, be back later”. I was secretly jealous of how easy it was for him to take time out for himself. When I would show my irritation he would simply look at me and say “Nothing’s keeping you from doing the same thing baby…that’s on you”. So, now 4 children later I am crystal clear on the importance of taking some intentional time out just for me. It’s not an option now….it’s a MUST.

What I know now that I didn’t know then is this: When you enter into a relationship you give up some of yourself to achieve a common goal. However, in the midst of merging two lives it’s crucial that you find space to maintain some sense of who you are so you can bring your best to the relationship. A video we did awhile back really breaks down yet another basic relationship requirement: “ME TIME”. Drop a comment or submit a video response letting us know what you think.

Response Video Opinion: A Husband Speaks Up On The Importance Of “A Marriage Dress Code”

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RESPONSE VIDEO: A couple of weeks ago we answered a viewer who asked if there should be a dress code when going out with your sweetheart. So, we tackled that question and also shared some general rules that we feel all couples should adhere to when hanging out together. Now, a husband has submitted a video response to weigh in on this topic. Listen in for a husband’s perspective.

A Husband Speaks Up On The Importance Of “A Marriage Dress Code”.

Miss the video this hubby is responding to? Check it out below.

Today, we’re going to answer a 3 part question that came in. From what type of rules we have in our relationship to talking honestly about being attracted to another person—we’re answering all of this viewer’s questions. She says she’s pretty open minded and transparent…but her man is closed mouthed when it comes to telling her what he REALLY thinks of other women. I wonder why ? We think it comes down to one 5 letter word. Hmmm… Should there be “rules” in a relationship? Absolutely. Will they always be the same from relationship to relationship? Not necessarily. However, there are some basics that everyone should be operating from. Here are a few… What are some “Relationship Rules” that have worked (or not) for you and yours? Leave a comment letting us know what you think or submit s video response and we’ll post it on our site at www.blackloveandmarriage.com.

What Men NEED Women To Know During Football Season!

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It’s that time of year again…when men get comfortably nestled in their recliner in anticipation of opening kickoff. Disinterested wives are abandoned as men flock to fantasy football and the excitement of the NFL season.  Women…..you can get through this period if you take heed to a couple of tips.  Listen in and see how you can maintain some sense of sanity and keep the peace in your home as men jump head first with NO helmet into football season.

Do Something Different.Do Something New. Do Something For Your Relationship. Do Something For You!

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Basic Training For Couples Registration is happening now. Will you be there? Let’s predict the conversation….

Partner 1: You know that Basic Training class…the couples class I was telling you about? It starts September 28th.

Partner 2: Oh, yeah? What’s the point of it though? Isn’t it for people who have alot of problems?

Partner 1: I think it really doesn’t matter. You can be having no problems or be on the verge of divorce.

Partner 2: We’re fine. I mean, what they gon’ tell me that I don’t already know? Most people know what they need to do they just don’t do it, ya know?

Partner 1: Yeah, I know….that’s exactly why I think we should go.

This is just one of how many conversations will go between couples when talking about taking a relationship class. There is usually one person who is curious or feels they need it and there is usually one person who thinks it’s just not that serious. If you or your sweetie is unsure about whether this class is for you drop us a line or give us a call at 1-888-307-7970. We won’t hesitate to answer any and all of your questions. Do something different. Do something new. Do something for your relationship. Do something for you! This is the perfect opportunity for you to Stop Playing & Start Pushing.

Click here for frequently asked questions and here for registration information.

How To Avoid A Jerk/Jerkette Registration Has Begun!

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Jerks, losers, men and women who ain’t about nothing…call them whatever you want—we will show you how to avoid them and find “the one” that’s right for you. This class will help you break destructive dating patterns that have kept you from finding the love you deserve! Are you ready to start the journey? Mark your calendar! This class begins Sept. 30th!

Click here for details and registration information